What do I want my classroom to look like? I sat down to dream about how my classroom could change, agonizing over this question for weeks. Book clubs? Peer mediation? More flexible seating? What would make the biggest difference in how my students experience English class with me? I wanted my classroom to have systems, structures, and ultimately, a culture of engagement and effort in which my students try because they believe they can even if they have not yet. How do I get there?

Once I landed on this ideal, I made a list of what kept this from being a reality.

• Trauma: Students carrying the burden of trauma struggle to engage or relate
• The "Slippery Slope Syndrome": Students are so behind that they can't imagine catching up.
• Playing the System: Apathy and disengagement hasn't kept them from passing yet!
• Drama: In and out of school, students are provoked, misunderstood, and etc.
• Self-Efficacy: Students believe they can't because they haven't yet.
• Value Discrepancy: Education offers no tangible or immediate value; also, it's not fun!

This is a pretty hefty list. Yet, as daunting as it is, I found hope in the experiences I've had with students in the past: we all have experienced breakthroughs with students simply because we were able to relate to them. Could these inhibitions be removed through a structured time to relate and encourage my students?

At this point, the idea of a highly structured, conversational conferencing system just fell together as I describe it on "the product" tab. However, I still felt like my own teaching rhythms would make it nearly impossible to execute. How do I make time for conferencing when the majority of my students are behind grade level? How do I prioritize this endeavor as well as the many other components of weekly class time? How much time will this take? And, perhaps the item I was most apprehensive about, how do I maintain classroom management when all of my attention is siphoned into a personal conversation with one student? I found myself equally excited and suspicious; as great as it sounded, could it implement it with fidelity?

Finally, I began. It was definitely a struggle. I found myself fully exhausted at the end of conferencing days, having spent all of my energy juggling intentional, meaningful conversations with the normal stresses of managing the behavior of often-rowdy students. I would tweak things here and there - the kinds of activities students were completing while awaiting their turn, the number of minutes allotted for each conversation, even which day was set aside for it. Despite all of the tweaking and re-evaluating, my students immediately loved it. I found behavior to be better than normal, because students recognized that my attention was earnest and with their good in mind. Kids who typically tried to be nonchalant or distant were begging to sit and talk with me. It was a success. A struggle, for sure. But also a success.

Having practiced this for some time now, I still struggle. There are days where it gets pushed to the back burner. I frequently have to rain-check some kids on the roster, having run out of time. Unfortunately, relationships just aren't easy to prioritize in such a structured capacity. But again I'll say it: it's so worthwhile. Despite the added burden of implementing conversational conferencing, I find myself more convinced of its importance in establishing my classroom as a safe place.