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Link to Chaucer's Prologue for Canterbury Tales:

http://www.librarius.com/cantales.htm
Edited from: http://english.fsu.edu/canterbury/wifepro.html
Excerpts from the The Wife of Bath's Prologue
"Experience, though no authority
Were in this world, would be enough for me
To speak of woe that married life affords;
For since I was twelve years of age, my lords,
Thanks be to God eternally alive,
Of husbands at the church door I've had five
(If I have wed that often legally),
And all were worthy men in their degree.
But I was told not very long ago
That as but once did Jesus ever go 10
To a wedding (in Cana, Galilee),
By that example he was teaching me
That only once in life should I be wed.
And listen what a sharp word, too, was said
Beside a well by Jesus, God and man, 15
In a reproof of the Samaritan:
'Now you have had five husbands,' Jesus said,
'But he who has you now, I say instead,
Is not your husband.' That he said, no doubt,
But what he meant I haven't figured out; 20
For I must ask, why is it the fifth man
Wasn't husband to the Samaritan?
How many men was she allowed to wed?
In all my years I've never heard it said
Exactly how this number is defined; 25
Men may surmise and gloss how it's divined,
But I expressly know it's not a lie
God bade us to increase and multiply--
That noble text I well appreciate.
I also know the Lord said that my mate 30
Should leave for me his father and his mother,
But mentioned not one number or another,
Not bigamy nor yet octogamy.
Why should men speak, then, disapprovingly?
"Look, here's the wise king, lordly Solomon: 35
I do believe his wives were more than one.
Would that the Lord permitted me to be
Married half as often as was he.
Five-husband schooling's done the same for me.
I am ready for the Sixth husband, wherever he may be!
"But first I pray this company,
If I should speak as it may fancy me, 190
Will not be too upset by what I say,
For my intent is nothing but to play.
"My lords, I now will offer you my tale.
If ever I may drink of wine or ale,
I'll tell the truth on husbands that I've had, 195
As three of them were good and two were bad.
The three men who were good were rich and old,
200
So help me God, I laugh to think
How pitifully I made them work
Though, by my faith, it meant not much to me;
They gave me so much of their treasury
I didn't need to practice diligence 205
To win their love or show them reverence.
For they loved me so well, by God above,
That I put little value in their love.
The woman's wise who's busy till she's won
The love she wants, or she'll be left with none. 210
But since I had them wholly in my hand
And they had given to me all their land,
Why should I pay them heed and try to please,
Unless it were for profit and for ease?
I governed them so strictly by my law
That each of them was happy to a flaw 220
To bring me back some nice things from the fair,
And glad when I would speak with pleasant air,
For God knows I would chide them spitefully.
"Now hear how well I bore myself, and see,
The wise among you wives who understand, 225
How you should speak: accuse them out of hand.
There's no man who can falsely swear and lie
As half as boldly as a woman.
Now listen to my typical tirade:
"'Old sluggard, you would have me dress this way? 235
Why does my neighbor's wife have fine array?
She is so honored everywhere she goes;
I sit at home, I have no nifty clothes.
What are you up to at my neighbor's house?
Is she so fair? So amorous are you, spouse? 240
What do you whisper with our maid? Ah, bless me!
Sir Lecher, will you stop your treachery!
Yet if I have a confidant or friend
In innocence, you chide me to no end
If I so much as walk into his house. 245
You come home just as drunken as a mouse
And preach upon your bench. Bad luck to you!
That she'll not long in chastity abide 255
When she's assailed on each and every side.
May lightning and a bolt of wildest thunder
Come break your withered neck with fiery stroke!
"
"'And our apprentice Jenkin, by his hair--
Those curly, golden, shining locks so fair--
And by the fact he squires me where I go, 305
Gives you a false suspicion. Kindly know
I wouldn't want him if you died tomorrow.
"'But tell me this, why hide (be it your sorrow!)
The keys from me that lock your chest? I'll tell
You this, your property is mine as well. 310
Am I an idiot like some other dames?
I tell you by that lord they call Saint James,
You won't be--you can rave mad in the woods!--
Master of both my body and my goods;
You'll forgo one, I tell you to your eye. 315
What help is it to ask around and spy?
I think that you would lock me in your chest.
To say, "Go where you please, wife," would be best,
"Have fun, I won't believe tales told in malice,
For I know you to be a good wife, Alice." 320
And yet just like a horse I'd bite and whinny,
Complaining well when I myself had guilt,
For they'd have killed me had the beans been spilt.
Who comes first to the mill is first to grind;
I'd be first to complain, and always find 390
Our war was quickly over--gladly they
Repented things they didn't do or say.
On wenches I would give them reprimand
When they were so sick they could hardly stand.
"Yet each was tickled in his heart to see 395
What he thought was such love for him in me.
I swore that all my walking out by night
Was just to keep his wenches in my sight.
With that excuse I had me lots of mirth.
For we are given such keen wits at birth 400
To cheat and weep and spin; these God will give
To women naturally long as they live.
So one thing I can speak of boastfully,
And so to every man I tell this tale:
Gain what you can, for everything's for sale,
And no hawk by an empty hand is lured. 415
"The words we'd have were always of that sort.
And now on my fourth husband I'll report.
"A reveler was husband number four,
That is to say, he had a paramour( lover).
And I was young and wanton, passionate, 455
As jolly as a magpie, obstinate
And strong. How I could dance to a small harp, too,
And sing like any nightingale can do
When I had drunk a draught of good sweet wine!
Metellius, that dirty churl, the swine, 460
Picked up a staff and took his spouse's life
For drinking wine. If I had been his wife,
He never would have daunted me from drinking!
465
And now I'll tell of husband number four.
"I had within my heart a great despite
That he in any other took delight.
I paid him back, by God and by Saint Joyce,
With a hard staff from wood of his own choice;
Not with my body, not by sinful means, 485
But entertaining folks in merry scenes,
I made him fry in his own grease till he
Was quite consumed with angry jealousy.
By God, on earth I was his purgatory,
For which I hope his soul is now in glory. 490
For there was none save God and me who knew
The many torments that I put him through.
He died when I came from Jerusalem; 495
Beneath the rood-beam where we buried him,
His tomb was surely not as finely done
As was great King Darius's, the one
Built by Apelles with such skill and taste.
A costly burial would have been a waste. 500
"Of husband number five I now will tell.
God grant his soul may never go to hell!
And yet he was to me the very worst; 505
I swear I loved him best of all, for he
Was always playing hard to get with me.
We women have--the truth, so help me God-- 515
In this regard a fancy that is odd;
That which we can't get in an easy way
Is what we'll crave and cry for all the day.
Forbid us something and then we'll desire it,
But press it on us and we'll not require it. 520
"My husband number five, God bless his soul,
I took for love, no riches were my goal.
He once had been an Oxford clerk, but then
Had left school and gone home, and boarded in
Our town with a good friend of mine, the one,
God bless her soul, whose name was Alison. 530
She knew my heart, each of my secrets well,
Much better than the parish priest. I'd tell
Her everything, disclosing to her all;
For had my husband pissed upon a wall
Or done something that could have cost his life, 535
To her and to another worthy wife--
And also to my niece, whom I loved well--
His every secret I would fully tell.
God knows, I did this so much, to his dread,
It often made his face get hot and red. 540
He felt ashamed, but blamed himself that he
Had told to me so great a privity (privacy)
"It so befell that one time during Lent,
As often to this close friend's house I went
(And I so loved to dress up anyway 545
And take my walks in March, April, and May
From house to house, to hear what tales were spun),
This clerk named Jenkin, my friend Alison,
And I myself into the meadows went.
My husband was in London all that Lent, 550
So I had much more leisure time to play,
To see and to be seen along the way
By lusty folks. How could I know when there
Would come good fortune meant for me, or where?
And so I made my visits, I'd attend 555
Religious vigils and processions, wend
With pilgrims, hear the sermons preached; also
To miracle plays and weddings I would go.
The clothes that I would wear were scarlet bright;
There never was a worm or moth or mite, 560
As I may live, could bring to them abuse.
Do you know why? They always were in use.
"I'll tell you now what happened next to me.
I've said we walked into the fields, we three;
And there we really had a chance to flirt, 565
This clerk and I. My foresight to assert,
While we were talking I suggested he,
If I wound up a widow, marry me.
For certainly--I say it not to boast--
Of good purveyance I have made the most 570
In marriages and other things as well.
"When my fourth husband lay upon the bier,
I wept, of course, grief-stricken to appear,
As wives must do (the custom of the land),
And hid my face with the kerchief in my hand. 590
But as I'd be provided with a mate,
I wept but little, I can truly state.
"Now as my husband to the church was borne
That morning, neighbors went along to mourn,
With our clerk Jenkin being one. As God 595
May help me, when I saw him trod
Behind the bier, I thought that he had feet
And legs as fair as ever I could meet,
And all my heart was then in his dear hold.
He was, I think, then twenty winters old, 600
And I was forty, telling you the truth;
But I have always had a coltish tooth.
"What shall I say except, when that month ended,
This jolly Jenkin whom I thought so splendid
Had married me midst great solemnity.
I gave him all the land and property 630
That ever had been given me. And yet
It was thereafter much to my regret;
Of nothing that I wanted he would hear.
By God, he struck me so once on the ear
(Because I tore a page out of his book)
That it went deaf from that one blow it took.
But I was stubborn like a lioness
And lashed him with my tongue without redress.
And I'd go walking as I'd done before
From house to house (though I would not, he swore), 640
For which he oftentimes would start to preach
To me. Old Roman stories he would teach,
Like how Simplicius Gallus left his wife,
Forsaking her the remainder of his life,
Because he caught her looking out the door 645
One day bareheaded--that and nothing more.
"A Roman, too, he told me of by name
Whose wife had gone out to a summer's game
Without his knowledge; he forsook her too.
And then he'd go and search his Bible through 650
For a proverb of Ecclesiasticus
Wherein he gives a firm command to us:
No man should let his wife go roam about…
(He then reads to her for 6 straight pages more of examples of biblical bad wives who deserved punishment until she can no longer hold her temper)
Who could have thought, whoever would suppose
The woe and torment that was in my heart?
"And when I saw that he would never part
With reading in this curséd book all night,
Three leaves all of a sudden I tore right 790
Out of his book while he was reading it,
Then with my fist I gave his cheek a hit
And he fell backwards right into the fire.
He jumped up like a lion full of ire
And with his fist he hit me in the head, 795
And I lay on the floor then as if dead.
And when he saw how stilly there I lay,
He was aghast and would have run away,
But then at last out of my swoon I woke.
'O false thief, have you slain me?' then I spoke. 800
'You've murdered me for all my land, that's why,
Yet let me kiss you now before I die.'
"Then near he came and knelt down by my side,
And said, 'Dear sister Alison, my bride,
So help me God, I'd never hit my dame (lady); 805
For what I've done you are yourself to blame.
Forgive me, I beseech you and implore.'
And then I hit him on the cheek once more.
'This much I am avenged, O thief,' I said.
'I can no longer speak, I'm nearly dead.' 810
"But in the end, for all we suffered through,
We finally reached accord between us two.
The bridle he put wholly in my hand
To have complete control of house and land,
And of his tongue and hands as well--and when 815
He did, I made him burn his book right then.
And when I had by all my mastery
Thus gained for myself all the sovereignty--
When he had said to me, 'My own true wife,
Do as you please the balance of your life; 820
Keep your honor as well as my estate'--
From that day on we never had debate.
I was as true as any wife you'd find
From India to Denmark, and as kind,
So help me God, and he was so to me. 825
I pray that God who sits in majesty
Will bless his soul for all his mercy dear.
Now I will tell my tale if you will hear."

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