FRQ 3

Author Study: FRQ #3

In the book What Happened to Goodbye, Sarah Dessen discusses Mclean’s journey of escaping from the pain of her fractured family and her avoidance of making deep, long lasting connections with others in order to convey Mcleans deception of her true self from the people around her, ultimately illustrating individuals will go to extreme lengths to avoid facing the past.

Dessen converses about  Mclean’s attempt to escape the poignant feelings she endures from her broken family in order to highlight the unhealthy coping methods Mclean utilizes. For instance, Mclean constantly tries to avoid any type of emotional connection with her father. She actively keeps away from discussing her feelings with him even though it is apparent he wants to rekindle their relationship. Because Mclean feels betrayed by her father she forces herself to detach emotionally from him. After the divorce of her parents, Mclean believes her father to be neglectful of true emotion and therefore tries to keep everything surface level with him. Whenever Mclean's father tries to have a heart to heart discussion with her or tries to become more involved with her personal life, Mclean will resist and shut off her true feelings. Deep down, Mclean wants to renew her relationship with her father, yet she consistently deceives him in order to keep the pain of their broken family submerged. Furthermore, not only does Mclean stay emotionally disconnected from her father, she also stays detached from her mother in order to further avoid the pain of her splintered family. For example, Mclean avoids her mother almost entirely, but when she is not able to do so she ensures that she completely hides all true emotion from her mother. Mclean wants to stay as emotionally detached from her mother as possible. Because Mclean's mother is another source of emotional pain, Mclean will circumvent any type of closeness with her. Once again, Mclean feels betrayed by her mother because she believes her mother did not fight hard enough to keep their family together, and instead she created a whole new life in which Mclean feels she has no place in. Mclean resents her mother for the actions she has taken, yet she doesn't want to show her mother how much it truly hurt her. Thus, Mclean tries to deceive her mother into believing that she is okay. 

Furthermore, Mclean avoids personal connections with her peers to avoid others seeing the pain and hurt she truly feels, Dessen discusses Mclean's various strategies she uses in order to deceive others and hide her true self. For instance, Mclean made a habit of picking and choosing different identities with every move she makes. Because Mclean and her father-move very frequently due to her parents divorce and her fathers job she is constantly having to reintroduce herself. Consequently, with each new town, Mclean creates a new persona for herself giving her the opportunity for a fresh start. This allows Mclean to avoid the burden of her past relationships and friendships knowing who she truly is. For example, in one town she will adopt the quiet, shy girl, while in another, she is the outgoing, carefree girl. Therefore these altering identities interfere with anyone from truly getting to know Mclean. Additionally, with all of Mclean's personality changes she ensures that no matter what she never displays any emotional vulnerability. For example, Mclean keeps her emotions hidden from everyone around her including family, classmates, and friends. Because she burdens only herself with her emotions, nobody sees the pain she is carrying from her parents divorce or the confusion she has about her identity. Consequently, she pushes people away by the distance she creates within their relationships. She avoids deep conversation, often keeping the topics superficial. For instance, when people ask about her family or personal life, Mclean will deflect away from the question or answer very vaguely. Thus, with deception and emotional detachment she creates within her relationships with her peers allows her to maintain control and avoid the risk of being hurt further. 

Overall, Mclean's methods of deception allows her to protect herself from the emotional fallout she experienced after her parents divorce and from the possibility of forming deep connections. Mclean hides herself from the people she is supposed to be closest to, her mother and father. She wants to ensure that she burdens nobody but herself, and does so by creating fake personas and emotionally detaching from everyone. Ultimately displaying people will go to great lengths to avoid confronting their past.

2nd Author Study: FRQ #3

In the book Dreamland, Sarah Dessen discusses the cycle of abuse and the loss of identity in order to convey Caitlin’s personal journey and the evolution of her identity, ultimately illustrating the psychological and emotional distress individuals endure within an abusive relationship. 

Dessen discusses Caitlins repetitive cycle of abuse that she endures from her boyfriend Rogerson in order to highlight the psychological trap Caitlin feels she is in. For example, the first time that Rogerson hits Caitlin it happened very unexpectedly. He slapped her across the face after she was late to pick him up. Caitlin was shocked by what Rogerson had done, but she rationalizes his behavior, convincing herself it was an accident and that she provoked hsi behavior. Consequently, this instance marks the beginning of the control Rogerson has over Caitlin. She is blinded to the true danger of her situation because she feels they are in love. Caitlin begins altering her behavior and grows into isolation in order to avoid upsetting him. Therefore, this initial sign of abuse is a pivotal moment that shifts Caitlin and Rogersons relationship from loving to abuse. Caitlins clouded judgment of Rogerson and her situation highlights the beginning stages of a toxic, abuse cycle. Furthermore, Caitlins experience of abuse continues to escalate over time. The abuse becomes more frequent and severe, resulting in Caitlin living in constant fear of setting him off. An example of the escalated abuse was an instance when Caitlin did not answer his call quickly enough. Rogerson responded to this by hitting her harder than ever before. Instead of just a slap across the face, he left visible bruises on her. Because Caitlin feels she has to protect Rogerson and she is covered in bruises she feels obligated to cover them up and further isolate herself from others. Over time, she stops resisting his violence, anticipating his anger and doing everything she can to avoid upsetting him. Consequently, this escalation shows how Caitlin becomes deeply trapped in a cycle of abuse, normalizing Rogersons violent behavior. Thus, it is apparent that cycles of abuse can feel helpless to victims. Caitlin feels that she has no other option besides being with Rogerson. Rogerson has completely manipulated her into believing that he loves her, and the abuse is just an expression of how much he cares for her. This manipulation and cycle has taken a complete toll on Caitlins psychological state. 

Additionally, not only does Dessen converse about the struggle Caitlin faces when stuck in the cycle of abuse, she also discusses the immense negative impact abuse has over Caitlins identity. Dessen confides about Caitlins struggle and loss of identity when in a relationship with Rogerson in order to demonstrate the emotional turmoil it had over Caitlin. An example of Caitlin losing herself and her identity was when she gave up her passion, photography. As her relationship with Rogerson became more abusive, Caitlin decided to take time away from the things she enjoyed and instead spend it with Rogerson. Caitlin was desperate to avoid any sort of conflict with him. Because Caitlin was so focused on trying to manage Rogerson’s moods and avoided provoking him, she faded away from her passion for photography. Consequently, Caitlin giving up the one thing that she truly loved prior to her relationship with Rogerson reflects how deeply the abuse impacts her sense of self. She begins to define herself not by her interests or passions, but through the view of an abusive relationship. Therefore, this gradual abandonment of her identity is an illustration of how the abuse stripped away Caitlins sense of who she is, leaving her feeling lost and disconnected. Furthermore, prior to Caitlins epiphany she was subconsciously losing her identity however, even when she becomes more aware of her situation she is still struggling with losing her identity. An example of Caitlin’s epiphany was her coming to a realization of her situation and saying to her friend that she felt as if she was becoming less and less real and with each mark Rogerson left on her she slipped away from herself more and more. Because Caitlin comes to this realization it illustrates how the abuse was slowly diminishing Caitlin’s individuality, making her feel like nothing more than a shadow of Rogerson and the person she once was. Since Caitlin is recognizing the toxic nature of her relationship, she internalizes the pain as she believes that staying with Rogerson is her only option. Thus, her silence and withdrawal reflect the devastating impact of abuse, ultimately leaving her feeling powerless and disconnected from her own identity. 

Ultimately, Sarah Dessen Explores the cycle of abuse and the loss of identity to depict Caitlins personal journey and her transformation. Within Caitlins abusive relationship she endured struggles with identity and self worth. She struggled to find the will to stand up for herself as she was completely manipulated by Rogerson. Through Caitlins challenges, Sarah Dessen highlights the psychological and emotional impact of an abusive relationship.