communicating performance gaps

There will be times you will need to have difficult conversations with employees. Tension and differences are inevitable, but it's how we approach and handle these moments that can either help or hinder team growth. As a Recreation Coordinator, it’s essential to have a clear strategy for addressing concerns in a way that promotes learning, development, and improved performance.

Steps for Conducting Difficult Conversations:

1. Schedule the Meeting

While some performance gaps can be addressed in the moment, others need dedicated time to for the conversation. Scheduling a meeting with the employee will shows them that you're serious about their development and ensures you have enough time to discuss things in detail.

2. Prepare Ahead

Come to the meeting prepared and ready to share your observations. 

3. Keep it Constructive

The conversation should always stay focused on solutions and growth rather than blame. Be mindful to avoid negative language that could make the employee feel defensive. Stay solution-oriented and use feedback that helps them move forward.

• Tip: Focus on behavior rather than personality. Instead of saying "You’re not a good communicator," try "I noticed that there was some confusion when communicating with parents about their children's behavior. Let’s explore how we can improve that."

4. Describe the Gap

Clearly explain the difference between the current behavior or performance and what you're looking for. Make sure to describe the gap in terms of what’s expected and why it’s important for the program.

• Tip: Listen to their perspective as well. Understand the challenges they’re facing before jumping into a solution. This helps make the conversation more collaborative.

• "Mistakes are Opportunities to Learn" This mindset should be at the core of every difficult conversation. Emphasize that mistakes are natural and part of the learning process. The goal is not to focus on the mistake itself but on how to learn and grow from it.

5. Generate Options, Then Plan

Collaborate with the employee to generate possible solutions. It’s important to not just give orders but to work together to find actionable steps that both you and the employee are on board with.

6. Follow Up (Email, Check-ins)

After the conversation, it’s important to follow up with the employee to ensure clarity, maintain accountability, and foster a continuous support system.  

• Email: After the performance conversation, sending a follow-up email is crucial for reinforcing key points and providing written documentation of the action plan. Here's an example of how you might structure this email: 

Dear [Employee's Name], 

Thank you for meeting with me today to discuss your performance and development. I appreciate your openness and commitment to growth. As discussed, here is the plan moving forward:

1. [Summarize Key Discussion Points]: This could include specific goals, actions, or performance areas we’re focusing on.

2. [Next Steps/Action Plan]: Outline any immediate actions or steps you expect from the employee.

3. [Resources/Support]: Mention any resources or support that will be provided to help the employee succeed.

I will check in regularly to assess your progress, and please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need anything in the meantime. If you have any questions or need further clarification, feel free to let me know. 

I am looking forward to seeing your continued growth and success.

Best regards,

• Check-ins: Schedule follow-up meetings or check-ins to assess progress. This shows your commitment to their development and gives them the opportunity to share feedback on how things are going. Reinforce that you're there to help. This isn’t about creating distance, but building a supportive, ongoing relationship for growth.
  
  

Example of a Difficult Conversation:

Scenario: An After School Program Recreation Leader has been struggling to manage the children during group activities, leading to disruptions.

• • You: "Hi [Name], thanks for meeting with me today. I wanted to chat about a couple of things I’ve observed recently. First, I want to say I really appreciate the care you provide to the children. You’ve been doing a great job with their individual needs."

  • Leader: "Thank you! I really try my best."

  • You: "I noticed that during group activities, things can sometimes get a bit chaotic, and the children aren’t always staying focused. I’d like to understand your perspective on what might be causing that."

  • Leader: "I’m not sure. I guess I’m trying to give each child attention, but when there are a lot of kids, it can get hard to keep everyone engaged."

  • You: "I understand that, and I think it’s great that you’re trying to give them individual attention. The goal is to make sure all the children are engaged and that the activities run smoothly. How do you feel about using more structured transitions or offering small group activities to help manage the kids better during these times?"

  • Leader: "That sounds like a good idea. I think if I break them into smaller groups, it might be easier to manage."

  • You: "Great! Let’s also think about using some visual aids or songs to help guide the transitions between activities. How does that sound?"

  • Leader: "I think that would help a lot."

  • You: "Awesome! I’m confident this will help, and I’ll follow up with you in a week to check in and see how things are going. Does that sound good?"

  • Leader: "Yes, thank you for your support!"

  • You: "Of course, I’m here to help. Keep up the good work, and we’ll keep making progress together."

The language you use when coaching staff plays a significant role in how your feedback is received and how well your team members respond to it. Effective coaching language should be constructive, empathetic, and focused on growth. Here are some strategies and specific language tips to guide you when coaching staff:

1. Use Positive Framing and Perception Language

Instead of starting with negative statements or accusations, try to frame your feedback in a positive, supportive way. Use perception language. This helps to reduce defensiveness and opens up space for learning. Using phrases like "I noticed..." or "I observed..." makes it clear that you’re speaking from your perspective and provides room for dialogue. This avoids sounding accusatory. Be clear, honest, and specific with your feedback. 

• Instead of: "You’re not keeping the children’s attention."

• Say: “I noticed that some of the children were getting distracted during story time today. Let's talk about how we can make the activity more engaging next time. Maybe adding more interactive questions or varying the tone of your voice could help keep them focused.”

2. Focus on Specific Behaviors, Not Personalities

Focus on the behavior or actions you’re addressing, not the person. This helps staff feel that the issue is something they can change, rather than a judgment on who they are.

• • • • Instead of: "You're not a very patient person."

      • Say: "I observed that during playtime, a few children seemed to be struggling with the activity, and I could tell you were getting a bit frustrated. Let’s talk about ways we can approach those moments with more patience and understanding. Maybe we can offer extra support for those children to keep the activity flowing smoothly.”

3. Ask Open-Ended Questions for Reflection

Encourage the employee to think critically about their performance and reflect on their own development. This fosters a growth mindset and helps them take ownership of their improvement.

• • • • Tell me more about...

      • Help me understand...

      • What made you decide...

      • Can you give me an example...

      • What have you tried already?

4. Reinforce the “Why” Behind the Feedback

When coaching, always try to explain the why behind the feedback. Help the employee understand how their actions impact the team, the organization, or the goals.

• 1. 1. • Instead of: "You need to follow the rules more strictly."

        • Say: "Following the routines and guidelines helps create a calm and structured environment for the children. When they know what to expect, they feel more secure, and it helps prevent disruptions. Let’s work on making sure the children stay on schedule and that the transitions are smoother.”

        • Instead of: “You’re not being punctual."

        • Say: “Being on time helps ensure the team can start on schedule and that no one is left waiting. It also sets a good example for the rest of the team.”
          
          

5. Encourage and Empower

Always end coaching conversations on a note of encouragement. This can help your staff feel supported, rather than criticized, and can motivate them to improve.

• 1. 1. • Instead of: "This needs a lot of improvement."

        • Say: “I know you’re committed to providing the best care for the children, and I can see how much effort you put in. Let’s work together to fine-tune a few areas, like managing group activities, and I’m confident you’ll continue making a positive impact on the kids.”