Mexican Bird Army?

Disturbing news coming in over night. Confirmed reports of a bird army from Mexico are coming in by the dozens. Our reporter on the ground had this to say, "In these close ups behind me you can see many different birds training fo battle, chickens, chicks, and even bald eagles. Concerns are growing on the US-Mexico border. Some people goin as far as to equip their houses with anti-air guns. Some school buses equiped with tail guns, and we see children with handguns. We have asked for a comment from our president, but he has not responed. This is Jeff Bezos on the ground in Mexico."

Unfortunately, the birds found out Jeff was there and tortured and killed him immediately. Our condolences go out to Jeff and his family in their time of grieving. More reports are coming in about the size of the army but it is currently unknown. Before Jeff died he talked to some of the men and women who lived on the border. One of them was a bus driver, lets here what he has to say, "We folk down here are the first ones who gonna be attacked I tell yah. We be arming ourselves and protectin' the children. I was the one who had the great idea to strap this tail gun to the back of the bus," He saided pointing at his bus, "Cost us a few hundred dollers but if it means keeping the children safe and those dang immigrants out than it's fine with me."