Effective mentee/mentor relationships are grounded in clear, open communication and trust. For mentors, this also includes an understanding that expectations and the academic environment shifts and changes and that their mentee's experiences may be different from what they experienced preparing for tenure. For the mentee, being able to express goals and needs is critical.
The following extracted with permission from the UCSF Faculty Mentoring Handbook by Mitchell D. Feldman, MD, MPhil, (2017)
Effective Mentee/Mentor Meetings
A critical component of a successful mentoring relationship is clarity of commitment and expectations. Mentors and mentees should to agree on:
Scheduling and logistics of meeting
Frequency and mode of communicating between meetings
Responsibility for rescheduling any missed meetings
Confidentiality
“Off-limits” conversations
Giving and receiving feedback
Working with formalized mentee goals
Structured, regular meetings can help provide clarity and build effective mentee/mentor dynamics. One suggestion is the “10/20/60 Rule” that will help you to establish a solid partnership and address mentoring goals and everyday issues. For a meeting of about 1½ hours split the time roughly as follows:
First 10 Minutes: Engage in personal/professional “check-in”
Next 20 Minutes: Focus on ‘front burner’ issues (upcoming presentation, manuscript revision, etc.)
Next 60 Minutes: Discuss current and long term goals and priorities; summarize discussion, clarify tasks, schedule follow-up meeting
When people trust each other, they allow their most authentic self to emerge. They feel free to share concerns, insecurities and doubts. Listening to each other builds trust. Sharing reservations and uncertainties builds trust. Most importantly, demonstrating by our acts that we are trustworthy builds trust
Behaviors That Build Trust: Behaviors That Destroy Trust:
Being a proactive listener Not paying attention to what is being said
Cooperating with others Being competitive
Openly sharing and being vulnerable Withholding and keeping people out
Actions are parallel to words Acting contrary to words
Accepting and non-judgmental Criticizing and disapproving
Authentic and true-to-self Acting with a hidden agenda
Freely admitting mistakes and errors Blaming others for mistakes
Actively seeking out different perspectives Keeping a closed mind to new ideas
Encouraging others to succeed Discouraging others from taking risks
Having a positive, upbeat outlook Projecting a negative perspective
Honoring and respecting confidentiality Breaking confidence
Mentees want to receive honest, candid feedback from their mentor. Equally important is the feedback mentees can offer to mentors. Engaging in reciprocal and on-going feedback is a vital component of the partnership.
Effective feedback:
Is offered in a timely manner
Focuses on specific behaviors
Acknowledges outside factors that may contribute Emphasizes actions, solutions or strategies
Effective Feedback from Mentee:
Whether the advice or guidance you offered was beneficial and solved an issue
Whether the mentor communication style and/or actions facilitate a positive mentoring experience
Whether the mentor communication style and/or actions create challenges to a positive mentoring experience
Effective Feedback to Mentee:
Mentee strengths and assets
Areas for growth, development and enhancement Harmful behaviors or attitudes
Observations on how your mentee may be perceived by others
See also: Tools for inclusive communication
Additional resources:
Giving and getting career advice: Giving and Getting Advice.pdf
American Heart Association Mentoring Handbook
http://my.americanheart.org/idc/groups/ahamah- public/@wcm/@sop/documents/downloadable/ucm_319794.pdf
Association for Women in Science
http://www.awis.affiniscape.com/displaycommon.cfm?an=1&subarticlenbr=37
MedEd Mentoring http://www.mededmentoring.org/default.asp
MentorNet http://www.mentornet.net/
Woman to Woman Mentoring Program http://www.w2wmentoring.org/
The American Physiological Society http://www.the-aps.org/mm/Career/Mentor/Mentoring-and-Being-Mentored
The Mentor Directory http://www.peer.ca/mentor.html
Virtual Mentor, American Medical Association Journal of Ethics http://virtualmentor.ama-assn.org/
https://apo.ucla.edu/faculty-career-development/mentoring-resources-council-of-advisors
https://nap.nationalacademies.org/resource/25568/interactive/index.html
https://www.nationalacademies.org/our-work/the-science-of-effective-mentoring-in-stemm
https://med.nyu.edu/for-faculty/sites/default/files/faculty-mentoring-handbook.pdf