Supporting Autonomous Learning at Home

In early March, in an extra snowy year, on an extra chilly day, just before Spring Break, a bubbly girl laid her jacket at her feet, put both arms in, and flipped it over her head. As she carefully aligned the zipper and pulled it up until she’d covered her mouth and nose, her eyes lit up and she took a little hop and exclaimed, “I can do it!” This moment has stuck with me for many years as I’ve patiently stood, waiting to go outside and play, while students help each other solve this small problem. That feeling of independence took time and effort from all of the adults in the child’s family, but especially from that early learner.

Building autonomy in our learners is an important step in preparing them to transition to the next grade. However getting to that step of “I can do it!” takes work from both adult and child. One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to give children the space to solve a problem. While they are sitting at a table eating, it’s much quicker for us to pour water into their glass or to cut all of their food for them. We encourage you to give them the space and tools they need to be able to eat independently. Mirroring how to cut or pour while letting them do it for themselves gives your child the chance to solve the problem for themselves. Likewise, if you are on your way out the door and your child seems intent on letting you put on their shoes, remember that giving them the space to solve their own problem builds not just the ability to put on their shoes, but the feeling of independence that comes along with it.

Another way to help children build independence is to let them make choices. This can be something as simple as letting them choose which way to go on a morning walk or what color to start painting with. Consider giving them the opportunity to take ownership over one aspect of their daily schedule. Every day after they eat a snack, perhaps there’s a short period where your child can be the one to choose their next activity. Remember also that tools like a daily schedule are great ways to help children build autonomy. Children love taking ownership over their daily plans. Instead of feeling like they rely on a grownup to tell them what is happening next, a daily schedule gives children the opportunity to check what is happening next for themselves.

Guiding children towards autonomy is not an easy task. Finding that balance between being supportive and giving them space can be tricky. As you’re focusing more on building autonomy remember to keep the “I can do it!” moment in your mind. While I would love to be out the door a few minutes early to play, I have to remind myself about what we are working together on accomplishing: “I can do it!