A Year of Trials and Triumph: Finding Strength in Love and Hope

By Brian Tomlinson

December 2024

As the calendar turns to another year, I find myself exhaling deeply—part relief, part gratitude, and part just utter disbelief. The last twelve months have been an unforgiving storm of challenges: health scares that left my family and me vulnerable, heartbreaking losses of dear friends, challenges at work, and an election that promises to redefine the very soul of this nation. Yet, here I stand, reflecting not just on survival but on the profound lessons of resilience, love, and hope that carried me through.

It began with whispers in a doctor’s office—words you never want to hear about your own health. As the weeks unfolded, it seemed every corner of life presented a new test, and we found ourselves navigating the labyrinth of hospitals and treatments. I was about to be tested mentally and physically in ways that I never thought would happen. I ran through the gamut of emotions, from anger, and disbelief, to utter fear, and then acceptance. To add to the weight, several friends, and family members passed away in quick succession. Each loss was a gut punch, a reminder of life’s fragility and the inevitability of change.

Just as I thought I might catch my breath, the country stood at the precipice of a historic election. The outcome felt seismic, shaking the foundations of what many of us held as truths about justice, fairness, and unity. It was a stark reminder that democracy is not a given but a constant act of striving and belief.

Amidst the chaos, my anchor has been my family. My wife, the love of my life, showed me once again the true depth of partnership. Her strength, even when she felt weak, her unwavering belief in better days, and the quiet moments where her hand found mine—all of it reminded me why we vowed to walk through life together. I am here today because of her love, patience, and strength.

Our children, most now grown, became our pillars. They checked in, made us laugh, and shouldered burdens when we faltered. Their love was a lighthouse guiding us through the fog. The bond we share feels unbreakable, forged even stronger by the fire of this year.

The election loomed as the nation’s great reckoning, and its results, a sharp pivot in direction, have left many of us grappling with what the future holds. Policies are set to change that could reshape families, economies, and the fabric of our communities. Still, I am trying to hold onto the belief that, even in uncertainty, there lies the possibility of renewal.

What I’ve learned this year is that hope isn’t born in the absence of struggle but rather flourishes despite it. Like the great thinkers—Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius, and the Stoics often remind us—it is within our control to choose our response.

The Stoics teach us that external events, while often painful, are not ours to control. What matters is how we rise to meet them. This year, I’ve leaned heavily on that philosophy. Journaling became my ritual, a way to unpack the day and recalibrate. Each morning began with a silent meditation: What can I do today to bring love, clarity, or peace to my little corner of the world?

As I look forward, I carry the lessons of this year close to my heart. Life is precious. It is fleeting. But it is also resilient, like the small shoots of green that push through cracks in concrete.

To my family, I owe everything. To the family and friends who are no longer here, I promise to honor their memories by living fully and authentically. To my country, even in this fractured moment, I will continue to hope—for healing, for listening, and for understanding that we are all bound together.

Through the storm, I’ve learned to find joy in the simple things: the laughter of my wife, the warm embrace of my children, fellowship and service with my Masonic brothers, or just a quiet evening with a glass of whiskey, and the stories that make up a life. These small, radiant moments are what sustain us.

“This year has been a ‘mental Olympics,’ testing my physical, emotional, and spiritual resilience. But with love as my compass, hope as my fuel, and the wisdom of experience guiding my path, I am prepared for whatever comes next.I think we are all capable of finding strength within ourselves, no matter how difficult the circumstances.

To those who’ve walked this journey with me, I am endlessly grateful. To those we’ve lost, your legacies light our way. And to all of you reading this, may your journey be one of love, strength, and purpose. Let’s embrace the days ahead together, one step at a time.

These are some of the books I have found very useful. 

• The Daily Stoic 

  • Ryan Holliday

• Meditations

  • Marcus Aurelius

• Unfu*k Yourself

  • Gary John Bishop

Growing My Mental Health

Brian Tomlinson

-September 2024

I have fallen in love with "my garden." I say "my" garden, but it's really my wife’s. I built it, carried the wood, poured the dirt, and decided on what to grow (I’m about to make my own tomato sauce again this year). She, however, tends to it daily, picks the vegetables and fruits, waters and weeds, and fiercely protects it from landscapers who, in her words, “disturb her babies.” 

Since the pandemic, my wife and I have nurtured a pretty large garden and began composting. Sharing this hobby with my wife has been a blessing—there’s only so much football, basketball, and baseball she can tolerate! We’ve read countless articles and watched what seems like a million YouTube videos on gardening tips. We even started a podcast about it. Ten years ago, if you told me I’d be gardening, I would have thought you were crazy. But here I am, learning what vegetables I can grow in August in Zone 7A! Let’s take a stroll through my garden, and I’ll show you how this hobby can be both calming and fulfilling.

Growing for Mental Health

Gardening is more than just having a neat yard or a few vegetables. For men over 50, it can become an essential part of self-care routines. With more time on our hands, gardening can help manage stress, strengthen mental health, and keep us physically active—when we're not golfing, of course!

I’ve noticed that gardening reduces my day-to-day anxiety and improves my overall mood. Studies have shown that time spent in nature lowers cortisol levels, the body's stress hormone, and promotes a sense of peace. Sometimes, I feel differently while on the golf course, but I digress. Gardening offers the perfect blend of physical activity and mental relaxation for those of us seeking a therapeutic hobby.

Growing for Mindfulness and Meditation

Gardening has a zen-like quality. Digging in the dirt, pruning vines, and picking ripe vegetables all give me a deep sense of satisfaction. While I don't meditate in the garden, I can see how it can bring a sense of calm to someone else. It's an activity that de-stresses, calms, and offers physical engagement—all good things.

Why Gardening Matters to Me

Since the pandemic and my prostate cancer diagnosis, mental wellness has taken on new importance in my life. I believe that men over 50 should naturally progress towards mental and physical well-being. Gardening not only offers purpose, but it also keeps us connected to nature and gives us a satisfying sense of achievement. 

By embracing this, we’re redefining what it means to age gracefully. Gardening encourages a healthier, more grounded lifestyle that nourishes the body, mind, and spirit. And I’m all in.

Whiskey Business: Navigating the Spirited World of Budget-Friendly Whiskeys

Brian Tomlinson

-April 2024

While I'm continually exploring the wide world of whiskies Though I have seen many after drinking them. But I know what I like, I know what I want to pay for, and I know how to enjoy a good whisky, especially paired with a good cigar every now and then. But, exploring the world of whiskey can be as much about navigating diverse flavors as it is about finding the right bottle to fit your budget. Whether you're a beginner and have no idea how to chose a whiskey, or you are a connoisseur looking for a luxurious single malt or just casual drinker seeking a quality blend that won't break the bank, there's a whiskey brand out there for you. In this article, we'll dive into some of the top whiskey brands for every budget, based on expert recommendations and consumer reviews. Now, what I learned from someone at Johnnie Walker, is that actually called a Scotch whisky it must be entirely made in Scotland, and has to be made from malted barley or grain and aged in oak casks no bigger that 700 liters for no lets that three years. Irish, the same made from malted cereal grains, and must be aged in wooden casks for at least 3 years. Now, I also learned that American whisky are mostly bourbons they are made from any cereal grain, rye corn barley and wheat. There is Tennessee, and Rye. 

Budget-Friendly Whiskeys (Under $50)

For those new to whiskey or looking for a daily sipper without a hefty price tag, several brands offer quality at an affordable price. I have tried  all of these, my brother-in-law introduced me to Monkey Shoulder, which made its debut in 2005, and it has become my favorite and go-to whiskey, along with the reliable Jameson. 

1. Buffalo Trace - Known for its smooth finish and complex flavors, it's a standout bourbon that's both accessible and enjoyable.

2. Monkey Shoulder - A blend of three single malt scotches, it's crafted for mixing but is equally satisfying neat.

3. Jameson Irish Whiskey- A staple for many, this Irish whiskey is versatile for cocktails and smooth enough to drink on its own.

Mid-Range Whiskeys ($50-$100)

In the mid-range price bracket, you can start to explore some of the more aged expressions or unique cask finishes. If you looking to step your game up a little, and order confidently at the bar, I think you cannot go wrong with the Glenfiddich 12 year old. I have not tried the Hibiki as of yet, but will be sampling some this summer.

1. Woodford Reserve** - With its rich flavor profile and refined smoothness, it's perfect for those looking to step up their whiskey game.

2. Glenfiddich 12 Year Old - A classic single malt Scotch that balances notes of pear and oak with a subtle peaty undertone.

3. Hibiki Harmony - From Japan, this blend offers a harmonious flavor profile with a hint of smoke and sweetness.

Premium Whiskeys ($100-$200)

These whiskies are typically more about the experience and complexity that comes with age and meticulous crafting. Now, personally, I would not spend this amount on whiskey, but that’s just me. However, the Macallan 12 and the Balvenie DoubleWood 12 are top tier and just smooth to the taste. I totally recommend at least one time to taste these. 

1. Macallan 12 Year Double Cask - Known for its rich amber color, it delivers a perfect blend of oak and sweetness.

2. Talisker 10 Year Old - For those who enjoy a smokier flavor, this single malt Scotch provides peaty complexity with a smooth finish.

3. Balvenie DoubleWood 12 Year Old- It gains its distinctive character from being aged in two wood types, offering layers of spice, honey, and fruit.

Ultra-Premium Whiskeys ($200 and above)

For the collector or special occasion, these whiskies represent the pinnacle of the distiller's art. I was able to get a hold of a bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue and though I am not spending that money, I am not mad at those who do. I was told to drink this neat with ice cold water to enhance the overall flavor the whiskey….yeah…it worked!

1. Yamazaki 18 Year Old - A superb example of Japanese craftsmanship, offering a sophisticated blend of sweet and spicy flavors.

2. Glenlivet 21 Year Old Archive - This Scotch is rich and rounded with deep fruity flavors and a complex, spicy finish.

3. Johnnie Walker Blue Label - A legendary blend that showcases the art of blending rare Scotch whiskies, known for its remarkable depth and silky finish.

Whether you're buying your first bottle, ordering at a bar, or looking to add a special something to your collection, the whiskey world offers a vast range of choices across all price points. From the robust and rich flavors of Kentucky bourbons to the subtle complexities of Scotch and the refined smoothness of Japanese whiskies, there's a brand and bottle that's perfect for every preference and budget. You may or may have not noticed the difference in spelling of the word whiskey/whisky. Here is something that is pretty cool and I did not know. The difference in the spelling refers to the where and how. Whiskey (with an “e”) refers to grain spirits which are distilled in Ireland and the U.S. Whisky (with no “e”) refers to Scottish, Japanese, or Canadian grain spirits. So if you want to know what you’re drinking, check the spelling. 

Do you have any favorite Whiskies? If you smoke cigars how do you pair them with your whisky? Share your thoughts.