Carter Goes K-pop

PHOTO COURTESY OF DANIELLE CERULLO VIA UNSPLASH

Originally published June 6, 2024

WARNING: The contents of The Canine Comical are purely fictional and intended to be humorous, satirical. Readers are advised not to confuse them with real incidents. 

   Mr. Carter, esteemed geometry teacher and avid k-pop collector, has been added to the line-up for SMYBE Entertainment’s new global group ‘PR1ME’. Along with six other members, Carter’s group is slated to debut on June 31st of this year. 

   “[To get accepted into a company] attend local or online auditions for your desired entertainment companies and show off your refined skills with confidence to the judges.” Wikihow said. “If you’re accepted as a trainee, be prepared for intense practice sessions, rigorous schedules, and monthly evaluations of your skills.” 

   Juggling grading papers and intense choreography, Mr. Carter spends an average of 135 hours a week at school or at the studio. 

   “[We practice] eight to twelve hours a day. We’re doing cardio, working with our vocal coaches, and working with our choreography coaches. Though, on days where we perform we might only train for three to five hours.” Carter said. 

   The passion for K-pop started out at a very young age. Though he was embarrassed about it, he eventually grew to accept his hobby as something to be pursued, leading to his audition at SMYBE a few years back. 

  “When I was younger, I was memorizing all the dance routines of all my favorite k-pop bands. ” Carter said.

   Their debut single, “First Equation”, takes inspiration from groups such as OldJeans, DTS, and Thrice. The summer release hopefully making it stick in the charts. 

   “[Our comeback will top the charts because] it all depends on the release date.” Carter said. “A song that will hang on the charts for about three to four months while the sun's out.”

   Rumors have been circulating the company from netizens, saying that SMYBE is too strict on its artists and not protecting them in the ways they should. All attempts to get a quote from SMYBE have been ignored.

   “We have to make sure that all of our outfits fall within a specific criteria that the company allows, and we can’t deviate from it.” Carter said. “When we sign our contract, even our public appearances and how we maintain our hair, our hairstyles have to fall within the guidelines of the K-pop Industry!” 

   Many of his students have started to notice the impact that this stressful career is having on Mr. Carter. His star student, Kylee Curtis, being one of them. 

   “He keeps muttering lyrics from his songs under his breath, it’s really unsettling,” Curtis said. “Even when he’s teaching he slips up and says things vaguely related to his debut single!”

   We at MBMS are lucky to have such a hard-working teacher at our school. Even though his social life may be suffering, he’s determined to make his fans and students happy.

   “We’ve come a long way and we’ve still got a lot more to put out. A lot more albums, a lot more money to generate for the company.” Carter said.