Family Wellness Tip

Peace Out

I'm guessing we aren't the only ones who use this term. Peace out is what we say when we are leaving. In this case we're talking about when your kids finally decide, sometimes with a push from you, to move out of the family home. Some kids are very excited to leave home and be on their own. No adults. No bedtime. No having to clean if they don't want to. It can be a glorious time. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, with freedom comes responsibility. Let's help prepare our kids to be responsible AND have fun. Sound a little nerdy? Probably. Setting them up for success is always the best move (pun intended).

How do you set your kid up for success as they're running out the door? Start early and make sure they understand some of the following (which is NOT a complete list):

  1. Budgeting is huge.

    • Have them practice with a sample budget using the job they have now or are getting. Let them see how much they will have on their paycheck after taxes. Look at different living situations (roommates, rooms for rent, living alone, etc.). Break down all monthly costs (gas, car maintenance, groceries, utilities, rent, fun stuff, etc.). Teach them to save enough for at least 1 month of living without a job.

    • Part of budgeting, is paying bills on time. Paying bills on time stops them from getting extra fees that will make them pay more and maybe go over budget.

  2. Discuss credit card reality.

    • Oh man. Credit cards can be dangerous, especially for kids and their not-yet-developed brain. It looks great and feels good to be able to have all the things you want. BUT it is often forgotten that you will pay an extra 16% on all the things you buy. The level of credit card debt can easily get racked up to $15K. That's crazy. For some kids starting off, they may barely make that much a year...so how are they supposed to pay without being stuck for years of payments. Teach delayed gratification. Big term for teaching your kids to work to save up for the things they want. Another good rule of thumb is the 30 day rule: if you still want a thing you see in a store 30 days later and have the money, then you can get it. It teaches kids not to be impulsive shoppers. It's good to start early with this one too.

  3. Noise ordinance.

    • As kids we often don't think about how loud things are to others, especially during typical sleeping hours. Teach them that different communities and towns may have different starts to "quiet time". Remind them that it is respectful and courteous to follow these rules.

  4. Regular check-ins.

    • Plan ahead of time how you or they will be checking-in. Yes, this is more for us AND it also keeps the lines of communication open for them. If they move across the country or world, texts and emails might be easiest to respond to. No matter where they are, phone calls, FaceTime, and face-to-face visits are the best.

  5. Car maintenance

    • My dad talked about this over and over. I'll be honest, I wasn't the greatest but did the minimum. I finally got it when I got a car I had to really take care of. It is the key to keeping your car longer and keeping it working better.

  6. Cleaning & Picking up

    • Give them a maximum amount of time they should go without cleaning. If they live with others, the time might be less to keep things running smoothly in the house.

    • Remind them that picking up after themselves, especially when living with others, is a big deal. Dishes in sink no longer than a day. Wipe down counters after fixing food. Pick up dirty clothes and keep contained in 1 spot. Wash bedding regularly. These simple things help with smell and critters.

So much to remember. Adulting is usually boring. Yes, fun stuff happens BUT it is not the picture that most kids have in their head. All the freedom to make your own choices and do what you want. Sounds awesome. In reality, we still have so many rules and expectations that comes along with the "freedom". Don't ruin their dreams BUT make them have a few more slices of reality to go along with the dreaming.