Family Wellness Tip

As always, start with rules. Rules rule our life. There are rules that we know, like laws. There are rules we have to figure out, like not hitting people when you get upset. Luckily with a driver's license, most rules are laws. You must pass drivers education. You must be at least 16 years old. No people under 20 in the car for 6 months after getting your license. Other rules are things you make up that will keep your child safe when they start driving on their own. The biggest thing, the fair thing, is to repeatedly tell your child the laws and rules for driving before they get their driver's license AND every time they take the car out for at least 3 months. Repetition is king in learning a new skill. This one too. Kids have to log a certain amount of driving hours in and outside of their driving class. Repetitive, correct practice is what sets perfect skills. Part of the practice is knowing all the state laws AND your family rules for driving.

Insurance is necessary. It is a required by law. It is expensive for new drivers and all drivers under 25. It is important for kids to know what insurance is, how it works, and what happens if there are tickets or accidents. Part of being a responsible driver is knowing about insurance.

Its a big responsibility. Kids need to know the importance of driving safely. They are behind a big piece of machinery that, if not used safely and appropriately, can harm or kill themselves or others. It is not something to be taken lightly. Substance use and driving...worst combo ever. Overly tired and driving...as bad as being intoxicated and driving. Distractions like cell phone calls or texts, or excessive people in the car...dangerous.

This is one of those times when independence isn't as fun as we'd expected. Yes the freedom that comes with going where you want by yourself is amazing. The responsibility of it needs to be the deepest groove on the record. Kids are very focused on peers and belonging. They are risk takers, yes...even the nerds like me were riskier at that age. The need to belong, the need to have strong relationships with peers and the riskiness may be a dangerous situation. Wear them down by repeating yourself on a regular basis on the level of responsibility that comes with this big, independent step. These things will NOT take away the worry but will help you know that you did all you can to set them up for success. All the work you've done to this point to teach them critical thinking and responsibility, will get through...maybe not all at once BUT it will get through. Take a deep breath as they drive away on their own with that huge smile on their face. Love them through the mistakes, because we know they'll make plenty. Help them recover by teaching them, again, the right thing to do. You'll get through this. Soon you'll even enjoy them doing your errands.