Being loved is being worn
In a sense I'm free
In a time we'd never meet
It would have been sweet
Heartbreak aches so sweet
Within the walls of the weak
Time will always eat
The wind chimes will tweet
The wind flows right through the leaves
Then the birds will weep
Little nightmares creep
Within the sheets through the night
Do not let them sleep
To be held by you
Arms holding me so tightly
Tells me I'm all right
Fills me with the warmth of sun
And lulls me to sleep at night
The stove flickers bright
As if It's trying to speak
Tell me its secrets
As I sit on the wood floor
Watching my kettle boil
I don't often stop
To dream about my longings
To give myself peace
When I pause and take a breath
The world seems to hibernate
A storm blows in
On a summer late at night
A quiet sigh
Releases all my sin
I hold another's hand
Which quiets the tides within
I grasp the hand so tight
And hold it to my chin
The wind whistles in
And chills deep into my skin
What a quiet way to live
When you cradle my bones within
I'd peel a thousand fruits
And run through the rain with torn and worn brown boots
To have you hold me tight
While the rain pours down at night
And tears will pour from my eyes
As new conclusions arise
Because I'd never believed
You'd wipe my tears
As my throat was torn with cries
The wind wistles in
And chills deep into my skin
What a quiet was to live
When you cradle my bones within
On day I might wake
And my heart will decide not to break
Cause you love another
And I've put my foot on the brake
Subtle is the breeze that strokes your wings
As you fly across the city to my window
Your wingss flap and swirl in my dreams
Drawing the air out of my lungs as I wake
You sing to me slowly
Sticking feathers in my throat
Love you dearly
Sweet Starling
Sing to me sweet starling
Wipe the tears from my eyes
Sing to me sweet starling
Let the world seem wide
When I wake the moon beams bright
Sending moonlight into my eyes
Your feathers have been left behind
On the floor
It ties my throat into twine
A whisper floats in from the window
Pushing my heart against my ribs
It wants to fly
Fly away to where your body lies
Sing to me sweet starling
Wipe the tears from my eyes
Sing to me sweet starling
Let the world seem wide
My world seems cold and dim
Without your quick little whims
Something crawls within my limbs
Unbecoming of my sins
I ache
Wondering where you've traveled
Wondering if the road was graveled
You've left me behind
And now I've become blind
An agony carves its way deep into my chest
further than anythings reached in years
It drives its knife deeper into my ribs and twists
Making sure I feel every bit of main Ive been meaning to forget
I try to tear it out but a hand grips my face
And forces my eyes to take in my shaking hands and the blood that stains them
The grip paints my skin in strokes of reds and blues
Forcing tears out of my eyes that spill down my cheeks
And force quiet cries out from my throat
Strained and broken
The hand releases its grip
And cradles my face
Wiping tears away with its thumb
With the warmth of a mothers hand
Before pulling away silently
And shoving the knife in deeper
Leaving my ribs more broken than before
And a bleeding heart in its wake
my hands scrape at my sternum
digging
trying to reach that agonizing panic
tears brimming at my eyes
cause no matter how hard I press
or how fast my hands shake
theres no way to break the bands
around my chest
they tighten and tighten
squeezing air out of mu lungs
tighter and tighter
till my breaths are only wheezes
Nausea now my only friend
I want to run away
Run up to the mountains
Where the roads run wild along the edges of. acliff
And where I can feel the wind
Instead of the sufficating air conditioning
Speed along the hot cement
Arm out the window
Leaving all connections behind
Chest slowly releasing the burdens I hid
Sit on the car hood
Staring far into the valley
Chugging water till I feel understood
And clean inside
Stare up into the stars
A chill setting in
Before I close my eyes
And feel peace along my side
the milk on my tongue feels bitter and all too sweet
and all i can think about is my lungs between my teeth
my teeth are scraping
and my lungs are aching
and theres blood on the floor
and my body's shaking
its taking and taking
and my bones are breaking
how can i know my worth
if all i know is aching
there's something unwell
that's crawling under my skin
leaving scars of memories
making no way for me to win
It leaves behind an endless pit of exhaustion
keeping my body pinned to my bed
stealing air from my lungs
leaving words unsaid
How dare you damn me
How dare you make me suffer
when I only wanted love
but was made to suffer
I scream into the void
trying to reason why
why I was made to rot
and others made to fly
why take my loved ones
one after another
after I finally found peace
with my fading other