Mother's Day

A patient's family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say.

"Things don't look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It could work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive."

"Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the father.

"You could get a man’s brain for $2000 or a woman’s for $1000."

The patient's daughter asked, "Why does a man’s brain cost more?"

The doctor explained simply "Well, you see, the man’s brain comes unused."

Today we honor our mothers and the women in our lives. Briefly imagine a parallel world with men and no women. It is easy to visualize how this world might quickly fall to chaos; research shows, for instance, that societies with more men than women are more violent and unstable (Bare Branches, Valerie Hudson). Perhaps this is why the Lord, shortly after observing Adam alone, said “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” (Gen 2:18)

Mormon Doctrine uniquely elevates and honors women which can be set in relief against the prevailing religious and secular worldviews.

Starting from the beginning of scripture the Restoration clarifies the fundamental doctrine of gender.

Nineteenth century Christianity believed that women were created after and out of man because women were an appendage to men. In contrast, Mormon Doctrine from the beginning recognized that Eve’s status as “help meet” formed from Adam’s rib reflects her status as a companion equal to Adam. She stands by his side, like his rib, not walking behind him, reflecting an equal partnership. (Earl Tingey)

Similarly, we are unique in Christianity in that we believe that the Fall was not a great tragedy caused by a treacherous or gullible woman; but that the fall was a necessary step forward in God’s plan for our progression which Eve made in courage and wisdom (Oaks).

Most profoundly, the Restored gospel explains that God is an exalted man and an exalted woman—there being no godhood without this coupling. God is not a bachelor, but Satan is. In this way, it is clear that men and women have different but equally important roles. Righteous married partners plan and organize jointly and unanimously on Earth and in Heaven. (Elder Tom Perry)

And this precious truth gives perspective, depth, and meaning to our marriages and families. This wonderful revelation (D&C 132) makes sense of Genesis (1:26-27) where God said: “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness…So God created man in his image,…male and female.”

Moreover, the Book of Mormon, long before an era emphasizing gender parity, states clearly that men and women are equal in the eyes of God: “…[God] denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; … all are alike unto God” (2 Ne. 26:33). Where else in scripture is such a proclamation. Or where else in scriptures is the importance of mothers so profoundly featured as in the history of the Stripling Warriors who faced and overcame great odds because “they had been taught by their ^cmothers, that if they did not doubt, God would deliver them.” (Alma 56:47). Mormon-settled Utah and Wyoming were the first to allow women full voting rights and the Relief Society is the world’s first and largest women’s organization.

I wonder if one of those plain and precious truths lost in the apostasy was to value the wisdom and natural empathy of women. After all, the resurrected Christ seemed to prioritize women, first appearing to women in his resurrected state at a time and place in history when a woman’s testimony was not even admissible in court.

What is clear to Mormons is not clear to our critics who maintain that equality requires that men and women have the same interests, qualities, and roles. Some in the 1960s claimed emphatically that men and women were really interchangeable parts who were made different by social conditioning. The last fifty years of research have established biologically-rooted differences and complementarities between men and women.

For instance women tend to be naturally more socially connected, cooperative, more cautious, more verbal, more able to handle layered complexity, better at multitasking, and evincing a higher social intelligence. Women also have significantly better balance and better perception of both color and smell.

On the other hand, men’s androgens promote being protective, less emotional, more risk-taking, spatial, interested in problem solving, independent, and corporally daring.

The specialization and natural complimentary between the sexes enable married couples to do more things well. In addition, the experience of making decisions with someone who sees the world slightly differently or with different strengths refines and expands us.

Although probably literal, the symbolism of the Garden of Eden and the Fall demonstrates the remarkable spiritual complementarity between men and women. There were two trees in that garden. The tree of knowledge gave Adam and Eve understanding and brought them into mortality. The tree of life restores their immortality, bringing them back to God’s presence.

“Tree of knowledge” brings us into mortality

“Tree of life” brings us home.

Eve was foreordained to partake of the fruit. As it was in Eden, so it is for all mankind. It is through women that souls enter mortality and gain their mortal agency. Every soul is escorted and guided into this life by a female guide. Eve escorted Adam into mortality by giving him this fruit. And though some do not act like it, every person on the earth is the child of a mother; even Christ the all-powerful God could not come to earth without the portal guarded by women. The fruit of the tree gave them knowledge of good and evil. In a similar way, women are the primary moral teachers of their children. Thus, women follow the actions of Eve, by escorting unembodied souls through the veil and teaching them good and evil.

As Eve and her daughters preside over the tree of knowledge, Adam, and his sons, are responsible for stewardship over tree of life. Through the priesthood, they usher the children of God through saving ordinances. While the world sees the church hierarchy as patriarchal, our view does not support this. We don’t know whether there will be a church hierarchy in heaven; but we know there will be families. The most important work we do is in the home, not at church or in our careers.

A youtube video took over my facebook feed some weeks ago. In it, a man interviewing applicants described an overwhelming position. He said, you must be able to work standing up and bending over all day, perhaps 135 hours a week. You can’t take a lunch break until the associate is done with her lunch. We’re Ideally looking for someone with a background in medicine, finance, and the culinary arts. The associate needs constant attention; some nights you will need to stay up all night with the associate. Oh, and we cannot allow you to take vacations; in fact for Thanksgiving and Christmas your work load will go up and we’d like you to act cheerful about it. Then the interviewer explained that the position was unpaid. At this point the interviewees boiled over. This is cruel, this can’t be; I’m sure it’s not legal, one said. The interviewer responded there is someone who currently holds this position. Mothers.

Men and women unite in parenthood prioritizing the needs of their children over their own desires. A growing secular culture encourages men and women to pursue worldly accomplishments or personal satisfaction at the expense of family. The importance of devoted parenthood is supported in the data. Constant early interaction with children develops the brain, memory, and emotional regulation (http://www.livescience.com/18196-maternal-support-child-brain.html).

It also appears that these interactions cannot be outsourced. A year of child care reduces the child’s test scores by 2.1% (Bernal & Keane 2011) in part because non-parents do not interact with the children as much and have weaker incentives to discipline and teach. Parental absence appears to have significant effects on academic performance all the way through high school (Lyle 2006) and a mother’s absence has a larger effect on her children than a father’s absence. Moreover, engaged and loving parents foster important non-cognitive skills including motivation, conscientiousness, interpersonal skills, and self-discipline.

I’ve never read about a great man or woman, a great philosopher or ruler, who did not have a great mother. Many had bad or absent or dead fathers. In fact, almost one-third of American Presidents lost their fathers in childhood including George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and James Monroe (http://www.npr.org/blogs/krulwich/2013/10/15/234737083/successful-children-who-lost-a-parent-why-are-there-so-many-of-them).

Abraham Lincoln, a giant in the landscape of world history and the most popular American president, explained “all that I am or ever hope to be, I owe to my angel mother”

I didn’t learn very easily when I was young. I was ADD, up-the-walls, and reading and math didn’t come very easily. My poor mother was so patient. Reading with me at night, patiently coaxing me to sound out the word and gently correcting my mistakes. I wasn’t very good at making friends, and she would coach me, quietly the cardinal rules of social cohesion. And then, she never stopped. In my personal battles and trials, she is understanding and compassionate in a way I cannot be. It’s her compulsion to help and nurture me. And it’s something that helps me tremendously. My mother had cancer three years ago. And it shook me to my core. It was an experience that knit our family together and taught me in part the value of motherhood. I asked my grandmother what it was like when her parents died. She said, you’re never really the same. They are the only people who are in your corner no matter what. And when they die. It’s gone and you think about them everyday.

Our mothers are gifts and guardians. I pray that we can express our love more meaningfully to our mothers and that we can honor women and the distinctly crucial role of mothers, In the name of Jesus Christ Amen.