"Punk Is Dead, Ween Is God"

The Jersey Beat Interview

WEENTRO

I can't remember just when it was at least five or six years ago, maybe longer when I first ran across Ween. At that time, they were really just kids, 15 or 16 years old, running around in bare feet, making horrible noises, one of them with a guitar and the other one the one in the silver swimmer's goggles - screaming his little head off, bass and drums erupting all around them from pre-recorded tapes. This was years before Milli had met Vanilli, before the New Kids lip-synched their way to superstardom. But there was nothing false about Ween. They introduced me to the cult of Boognish, to which 1 have slavishly devoted the rest of my life. In fact, the entire first eight years of publishing Jersey Beat have been nothing but prelude; Boognish made me do this zine so that when the time came now, at the release of Ween's double-album "Satan Ween God: The Oneness" on Twin/Tone Records there would be a vehicle for them to speak their truth to the world. Their real names are Mickey and Aaron - that is all I'm allowed to reveal. Mickey's entire family has been relocated somewhere in the rural Southwest by the Federal Witness Relocation Program, and Aaron reputedly owes Tony "Knuckles" Grossabugia, the Mafia don of Atlantic City, over $65,000 in unpaid markers. But that is another story one that will probably never be told.

Here, at least, is the story we're allowed to tell. At last, my mission is over. Hail Boognish. Ween is God. - Jim Testa

by Alex Swain

Ween, the virus, the strange spreadable disease that's taking over. I bet you're wondering exactly what a "ween" is. Ween are two suburban kids - Deen Ween on guitar, bass, and drums, Gene Ween on vocals who play music. All music. Ween is everything. Ween is all. Phone interview with Dean Ween was conducted on December 8, 1990 at 3 a.m., eight hours before Ween departed for their second European tour.

Alex: What is a Ween? What does it mean?

Dean: We are Ween. We are fucking Ween. Our whole lifestyle is pretty fucking Ween, and our whole train of thought is pretty fucking Ween. I dunno...I just..I used to call Gene a fucking ween.

Alex: Is that short for "weenie?"

Dean: No, it's kind of like wang and peen.

Alex: Oh, it's sort of a slang word.

Dean: Yeah, but it goes much deeper. Like if you asked me to mow your lawn, I'd probably WEEN it up pretty fucking bad.

Alex: Now I understand. So tell me, when did you form?

Dean: It was about 1970, or so.

Alex: Basically, I figured that, either '70 or '71.

Dean: Yeah, it was '70.

Alex: So you're 32 years old now, how old is Gene?

Dean: Uh, Gene is 34.

Th

Alex: Yeah, right. Was Ween considered a joke when you started?

Dean: No, no, no. It was never considered a joke. We shared a typing class together. I guess it was eighth grade. We were in Miss Slack's typing class at Solebury High School and that's where the apparition of BOOGNISH was first sighted. We were so moved by the sight he was talking to us not in words, but he was communicating to us what had to be done. And later that day, we had no choice but to go throw it down on tape, which was what he had communicated to us.

(I put down the phone to light a cigarette)

Dean: I AM WEEN, ALEX.

Alex: Ok, so what were we saying?

Dean: Uh, I forgot. Oh we were discussing BOOGNISH. Yeah, so, it was completely out of our hands what happened basically. Then Gene tried to leave the band. Two years after the first sighting and after that first session, BOOGNISH punished him so severely that he'll never try it again. It's not really up to us when it's time to quit or pack it in, because when He says it's time, then it's time.

Alex: Now that I know that, let me ask, what's the best thing to eat at El Taco Loco (the restaurant that Gene was once employed in).

Dean: I would say the beef and bean chimichangas are probably among the best. But other than that, I'd say the pollo esado taco but, uh, personally, I was there this evening and I got the cheese quesadilla with a side order of lettuce sautee and a large iced tea.

Alex: Supposedly you have millions of songs. Can you give us an actual count?

Dean: No, that would be impossible. We're kicking somewhere in between 2000 and 3000. Well, you see, it's a tricky thing. 'cause what we used to do is record entire cassettes in a day. We'd get together and we would, ummm, conceptualize the song titles, we'd come up with the titles. Classically, that's how we would write our songs and we would do entire cassettes, like nine to 15 songs, a day. Some days we would record a whole shitload of songs and then, right about now, we're doing a song or two every day. Then sometimes we don't record for two weeks. We have thousands of hours of tape, that's for sure. We know all the songs, too.

Alex: So last night you did your last show at City Gardens (in Trenton, NJ) before you move on to Europe, and you did a newer song called "Mocha." Tell me, what's that song about?

Dean: Like what it means to me? Mocha?

Alex: Yeah.

Dean: Mocha ties into the whole... fudge chocolate brownie theory that Ween believes in. It basically means that the chocolatey smell of fudgy stuff, like the show last night. When things are going really bad, mocha alerts people that sometimes the situation can get kind of fudgy.

Alex: Where does Ween live?

Dean: I won't give you our address but we live on a horse farm, out in beautiful Bucks County, PA, on the Delaware River. That's right, we live ON the river.

Alex: ON the river?

Dean: Yeah, and they're floating... (laughs) like a dock farm,

Alex: Kind of psychedelic.

Dean: Yeah, But we live on a horse farm, in New Hope, PA, and we live in a carriage house. It's a pod, we live in a pod.

Alex: And it's just you and Gene?

Dean: Yeah, just us.

Alex: So tell me about "The Ween," when Sim Cain and Andrew (from the Rollins Band) play.

Dean: Yeah, The Ween. Well, those guys came crawling to us on their hands and knees screaming for a change...they were getting really tired of their scene and, uh, they asked us if they could try out for our band, and we told them we really don't like them, and later they came back begging and we tried them out, and basically, they sucked. So they're out of there, fuck their shit.

Alex: Well, it's just completely ridiculous to imagine a real bassist or drummer in Ween, that's just crazy

Dean: Well in a situation such as ours, yeah, I mean, the BOOGNISH wouldn't have it. First of all, because they're just. uh... they've never experienced the common vision that brought Gene and I together. The COMMON VISION.

Alex: Like an aura where you and Gene reside, and no one else can see what you see.

Dean: They (Sim and Andrew) were pleading with us. They were begging us, totally begging to be with us. They even came up with these stupid names. Sim says he wants to be the Jolly Green Ween, and I said no fucking way. And Andrew tells me some shit about Ruptured Spleen Ween. I was like, "what the fuck? Pack up your shit and head for the door."

Alex: Well, can I be in Ween?

Dean: Like I said, it's up to BOOGNISH. It's completely out of our hands. It's not up to me to decide. Me and Gene are here to fulfill a need.

Alex: Tell me already, what the hell is BOOGNISH?

Dean: What IS the BOOGNISH? Well, the BOOGNISH is pictured on the front of our album cover, also known as the Ween coat-of-arms.

Alex: Comparing your first (extremely rare) album, and your brand new double album, there are extreme differences. Can you explain?

Dean: Well, the old record, the yellow record, was on Bird O'Prey Records, which was the label we were on at the beginning. Other bands on that label were Cleft Palate, The Scornflakes, Funkophobia, and other acts. They only put out about ten tape releases and only two on vinyl, Scornflakes and Ween. And at that point we were around for a long time. And the record is impossible to find. The only songs that we still play from it are "You Fucked Up," "I Drink A Lot," and "I Like You." And at that point, we were using a 4-track a lot more. We used to just use a 2-track and do a million overdubs. And that's how we did it. Anyone who has a copy of our first record must be a loyal fucking Weenhead.

Alex: So what about the new double album?

Dean: Yeah, that's something I like about it. It sounds like there's 26 different lend singers on it. But there you go. That's the magic of Ween and Gene Ween.

Alex: And it's all him, right?

Dean: Well, mostly... I sing a little bit in a couple songs.

Alex: Is it true you're brothers?

Dean: In the spiritual sense, yes. But in real life, we're from different families.

Alex: I firmly believe the two of you are bonded and that's the only way you can truly create music.

Dean: Yeah, but... I dunno. But there's no posing.

Alex: How often do you do shows?

Dean: Well, usually not very often. I think unfortunately for Ween, we've been playing too much. Actually, you know, Alex, we've played I think 46 shows this year so far, which is a lot. And by the end of the year, I guess, well, we'll be playing every day starting when we go to Europe. We leave in 7 hours. Go to the airport, and then we have Monday, we do interviews. And then starting Tuesday we play every day til New Year's, and even after that I guess. We'll have played 60 or 70 shows or something. Ween have NEVER called for a gig, we've never even tried to get a gig.

Alex: So what's it going to be like in Europe? Do you have people going with you?

Dean: No, just Gene and myself, and our Belgium tour manager. Actually he's our European tour manager.

Alex: And does Twin/Tone provide you with everything?

Dean: No. Nope.

Alex: Did they pay your airfare?

Dean: Yes, they DID pay our airfare.

Alex: How about food?

Dean: Food we get every night from the clubs. They have to make us hot meals and provide us with lots of alcohol.

Alex: Speaking of alcohol, what are your feelings about drugs?

Dean: Alcohol being the most evil drug there is. Well, I don't have anything against anyone who doesn't do drugs or anything. It's a totally personal decision if you want to do that but... you know... we endorse our thing.

Alex: What do you endorse? What do you think people should do? What's the Ween Theory of Existence?

Dean: I think that if, I don't think you should take yourself too seriously, which may not be completely legitimate advise, y'know, coming from Ween. I would say just don't take yourself too seriously and eat lots of cheese.

Alex: Cheese? Why cheese?

Dean: Why? Why not? Cheese is really good.

Alex: Ok, since we're on the topic of food, what's your view on vegetables?

Dean: Well, it was released in November, but we have so many fucking songs that by the time we put out any records, we're five more albums ahead of ourselves. So it's kind of a drag. I mean, I really like the Twin/Tone Ip but by the time the next one comes out, I mean already this year we've recorded 6 album-length cassettes worth of material. If you were to count all the songs we don't have on the new lp, it'd take forever. I mean, we're touring in support of this record, and when you have a song like "I Got A Weasel" which is from 1985 or some shit... It just sucks. However we haven't changed our sound since we started. I mean, we're still Ween.

Alex: Well, it's really a good record. How many songs, 26?

Dean: Yeah, 26 songs.

Alex: In which you cover Prince, right?

Dean: Yeah, the only cover song. We don't really do cover songs.

Alex: Not so much cover, but you use styles from other bands...

Dean: I don't know, you know what? If they keep them on life support I think that's just kind of fucking cruel because how do you know they wouldn't just rather be smothered with a pillow than uh... you know what I mean? I think it's pretty harsh shit, to tell you the truth. I think that people who are punished for mercy killings are unjustly imprisoned. I mean, I like vegetables just fine, as long as they aren't drooling all over my shirt. You know, snot running down their face. (Major laughs) But they really can't help it.

Alex: So what inspired the song "Nippy Wiffle"?

Dean: Well there you go. The song "Nippy Wiffle" was inspired from the title, and we fucking kicked it. The song was totally nippy wiffle. It seeps wippy niffle from every pore. (unintelligible comments on the tape, then...)... "Bumblebee." You have our record, right? Put on "Bumblebee." That groove is so bee-like. It's so fucking, like the most bee thing. I mean, you hear that you just imagine you're stepping on a fucking hornet's nest and it's just swarming.

Alex: And you're just waiting to be engulfed by bees.

Dean: Yeah, and it's going wawahohoooh (imitates bee noises)

Alex: Is that why you use a wah-wah pedal?

Dean: Well no, it's just...well, YEAH, but no. It's just bee-like. The whole thing bee-like. We don't read into it all that deep, we just say, "wow, let's do a song called Bumblebee." Well, actually, to tell you the truth, Gene was weed-eating his father's lawn when we were 14 or 15 and he mowed right into a hornet's nest. And he got all these welts all over his back from the fucking stings. That's what Ween is. That's why I said there's no posing about it.

Alex: What's the audience like in Europe? Do you have a following?

Dean: It's a lot different, but not necessarily better. It's different because Europeans don't get crazy, really. They have more respect. First of all, you don't play in bars, number one point. I mean, yeah, they serve alcohol at the bars, but usually it's like a really nice place. I mean you're not playing in a fucking hole. There's like a coffee shop and a restaurant, and it's like a community center, and it's all subsidized by the government. At least Holland is like that, and I'm sure Belgium is the same way. And when the people come to your shows, they don't talk when you play, they listen to every note, and respect it... When you're playing a quiet song, and you don't hear fucking beer bottles clanking and that shit, it kind of makes you feel like you're under glass or something. Like you're on display. But it's cool, it's a compliment, really.

What we do, which I think is a very American thing, I mean, we are two young American people. And they've never fucking heard of an "El Camino" over there. They don't have a fucking clue. And that song, it's not so much about the car but the plush velous motherfucking scumbags that usually drive them. And over there, they're just lost. But over here, Americans have pretty much seen it all. I mean, who hasn't shown their dick on stage or thrown up or whatever? Some people take it a little further than others, but...um, when you go over there, it's kind of strange.

And another thing, over there, if you're an artist, you're a fucking artist and that's what you do. And that's your thing. And it's kind of serious. But don't get me wrong, they have a LOT of shitty music. And over here, everybody and their fucking brother is in a band. So when you're American, and you go over there, show up with your guitar and your parka and your zits and your sneakers, and you're a scumbag and you know you're a fucking scumbag, and you know you're going to be making tacos when you get home, or pump gas or whatever... And um, you have so much fun. They really love what you're doing, it's really for real.

Alex: I think they have a lot of respect for Americans.

Dean: Yeah, they have tremendous respect but also, finishing up this whole question, it's a lot cooler to be big in America. I mean, if you can get a bunch of drunk Americans and you're just an opening band, I mean that's a much more critical audience than a bunch of Europeans. If I were to go on stage in Holland all drunk, throwing up on stage, and just be totally out of fucking control, they might like that, 'cause they don't get a lot of that. We were out there earlier, and there was this Dutch rap music shit, and they're going "ya ya man, come to party, man, "turn up the bass, man." I mean, what the fuck? That's bullshit. Cut that stupid shit out.

Alex: So you play guitar, Gene does vocals and backup guitar. But you also play drums and bass on tape, then play it back again and sync with it when you do shows. How do you manage that?

Dean: It's pure magic. Magic is a very key word to Ween. We were going to call our new album "Capture The Magic" and have a picture of Gene Ween on the cover.

Alex: So what kind of music does Ween model itself after?

Dean: None, really. I mean, like you're in a band and someone asks you what kind of music you like. And you say, R.E.M., The Byrds, whatever. Right then and there I'll know not to check you out, because I can just go listen to R.E.M. instead of you. And that's just the way I feel. I'm really critical of the music I listen to. I buy Prince records, Public Enemy records, and I buy Metallica records every year or so when they come out. But that's it. There's not much metal or anything that I'm really checking out. I mean, music is dead. Rap was like a slap in the face, but now it's been abused. Now you've got MC Hammer, which is a watered down corporate interpretation with soft elevance. It's so inevitable. And punk rock is dead, and anyone who says punk rock isn't dead is a fucking fool. It's dead. And I was really into punk rock when I was 13 or 14, it was a really great thing. And right now there's nothing for me. I have to say we're just Classic Rock. Not that we like Classic Rock, but people always want us to describe what it is we do. And alternative music is the worst shit in the world, and we sometimes get labeled as that.

Alex: So in essence, you just don't want to be labeled as anything except Ween.

Dean: Exactly. And Twin/Tone Records knows not to try. File under WEEN.

TOP TEN WEEN SONG TITLES

1. Nippy Wiffle

2. Everyone's A Lesbian

3. Ingrown Mayo

4. The Refrigerator That Wouldn't Close

5. Shnagenhausen

6. We Seen Ween Bean

7. Marble Tulip Juicy Tree

8. Wanton Nougat

9. Big Baboons

10. Boognish