All Your Favorite Songs

1

He hated her taste in music. Every single song she was listening to in front of him, as she sat across from him in the dorm common room, sketching something on a notepad with her phone placed on the arm of her chair, made his soul shrivel up a little and contract painfully. Every single song made him think of how unfair and cruel life could be, just how much pain it could cause, and he hated the feeling. Every single song was something that felt like it belonged to old CDs he’d listened to when he was a kid. Old CDs that his mother had put together when she was a teenager, and which she would play him every day, when he’d ask her to “play the good music”. He loved every single one, dancing wildly to one after the other. 

But now his mother was gone. And the joy that had once come with all those songs had turned to ashen, dull agony. Every note brought back that warm smile; every beat felt like the touch of those soft hands; every melody sounded like that loving laugh at the cute, awkward little boy flailing around the room, dancing as well as he could at his very young age. It was all making him feel just awful. 

Curse his earphones for having no charge in them. He stood up and left the room, perhaps a little more hurriedly than he wanted to. Once out of sight, he bolted past the elevator and up the stairs, all the way to his room without stopping. He sat down on his bed and caught his breath. The sound of the music was still swimming in his head. But so, too, was the one listening to it. There was something about her he couldn’t quite place. Whatever that something was, however, it made him stand up slowly and make his way back downstairs, back to where he had run from moments before. He re-entered the room, trying to think of other things so as to drown out the agonizing sound of the music, and sat down opposite her once more. To his surprise, she looked up at him and spoke:

“You okay?”

He cleared his throat a bit, before responding:

“Yeah, I’m fine, thanks.”

“You seemed a little distressed when you left before” - she said. He lifted his head to shake it and accidentally made eye contact with her for a second - the flicker of her eyes that he caught felt warm and compassionate.

“I…I forgot I needed to submit something, so I went up to do it” - he replied, somewhat shakily. 

“Are you sure?” - she asked, tilting her head a little. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m sure. Thanks.”

“What’s your name? I don’t think we’ve met here before.”

He introduced himself, then so did she…

…

…What time was it? He tried as hard as he could to steal a glance at his watch without breaking eye contact too noticeably. They had been talking about everything that came into either of their heads without running out of topics for a while now. As if reading his mind, she looked around suddenly, noticing the now dark windows.

“What time is it?” - she said. 

“That’s a great question!” - he replied, laughing a little. He checked his watch, and she did the same.

“Wow, we’ve been here a while!” - she exclaimed, - “Time’s gone by so quickly.”

“Yeah, it has, wow” - he replied. They’d been there for hours now! And in this time, he realized, he’d completely stopped paying attention to the music, which she had kept on in the background. There was something about her…

“I should probably go to bed. I have class early tomorrow.” - she said. 

“Yeah, me too, actually” - he replied, shifting a little awkwardly in his seat. Then, after a pause, he added, a little rushed: “It’s been amazing talking to you!”

She smiled. 

“Thank you! It’s been amazing talking to you too!”

She picked up her notepad, tore out a page and scribbled something on it hurriedly. She then gave him the folded piece of paper and closed his hand around it.

“Good night!” - she said, before quickly exiting the room.

“Night!” - he replied after her. He looked at his closed fist. He slowly unclutched it, revealing the little piece of paper. Gingerly unfolding it, he found just what he’d been hoping for - a phone number. “See you again soon!” was written next to it. 

2

The scent of their warm drinks wafted into their noses as they sat either side of the tiny table inside the coffee shop. It was their seventh or eighth time going out together, and they were, once again, talking about whatever came to mind, with no real direction to the conversation. But it didn’t really feel like they needed a direction - they were spending time together, enjoying the company and the sound of one another’s voice. At some point during the conversation, she stood up. He looked up at her, confused, but she walked around the table and sat on the wide seat next to him. They kept talking for a while, and, as they did so, they snuggled closer and closer to one another. Suddenly, she kissed his cheek quickly. He turned his head towards her, they looked at each other for a few seconds before both leaning in for a proper kiss. After it broke off, he smiled at her and said:

“I was going to ask if you wanted to be my girlfriend, but I think I got my answer”

She giggled and leaned back in to kiss him again.

The rest of the time they spent at the coffee shop was a bit of a blur. The next thing he remembered was them in her room now, drinking some wine they’d bought on the way. And there was music playing. Music that had, in part, been the reason they’d met in the first place. He still didn’t enjoy it, but he felt that it had definitely started hurting him significantly less. She had played those songs almost every time they’d been together, and he’d never said anything. He didn’t know why he didn’t say anything - he was sure she wouldn’t have minded if he’d asked her to put on a different playlist. Why then? He didn’t know. But it was almost as if that didn’t matter at all. He was here, and so was she - he hardly had any right to complain. And complain he didn’t. They finished their drinks slowly, enjoying every drop, then settled in a warm embrace on her bed for the rest of the evening, mostly in silence, just enjoying each other’s warmth and company. 

3

The crisp summer night air filled their lungs as they stood outside, the distant bumping of loud music faintly drifting out from the club behind them. His arm was gently wrapped around her, his hand on her shoulder, with her head resting affectionately on his shoulder. It had been nearly four years since they’d been together, and they were both graduating college. Their college years hadn’t been the easiest; both of them had gone through emotional turmoil, stress, disappointment and relief; but, whatever had been happening in their lives, they could always find solace in the fact that they had someone by their side who would be there no matter what. And this was the culmination of it all - this stage of their lives had come to an end, and they were getting to celebrate it in relative peace and solitude, just the two of them on the empty street. He turned his head and lovingly kissed the top of her head. She took out her phone and turned on music to keep them company in the silence. He still felt the slight painful twang, though it was the faintest it had ever been. But he only held her closer, as they turned their heads up to look at the stars just about visible in spite of all the city lights. It was a simple moment, but a precious one nonetheless. 

“We made it” - she said, suddenly.

“Yes we did,” - he replied with a satisfied smile, - “congratulations!”

“You too!” - she answered, lifting an arm to run her fingers through his hair. 

He looked over at her, standing there in the night, smiling at him lovingly, a street lamp behind her giving a beautiful, dreamy shade to her gorgeous hair. They both fell silent, just looking into each other’s eyes.

“I love you” - he finally said.

“I love you too!” - she replied. They embraced and shared a kiss. 

“Shall we go home?” - she asked.

He nodded. She took his hand, and they walked off slowly into the night, the music still playing from her phone. 

4

The new apartment wasn’t luxurious by any stretch of the imagination, but it was comfortable enough for them. On that particular autumn night, their friends had all filed in one by one for their housewarming party, and they were all sitting on the couch in the living room, drinking, talking, relaxing. She stood up and left the room, soon returning with a speaker. He knew exactly what was about to happen; the sounds of music politely squeezed into the background of the conversations happening in the room, filling the empty space; for the first time ever, though, it didn’t hurt him at all. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that, but he didn’t have time to think: this was the signal for him that it was time. He now left the room, and went to their bedroom, where he had found a particularly secure corner to store a sacred thing he’d kept a hold of for a month or so now, waiting for the right moment. He withdrew the little box from the hiding spot, slid it in his pocket and returned to the living room. He called a toast, looking directly at her:

“I’d like to take this opportunity on this special day to tell you something. You have been the most incredible person in my life from the second you appeared in it; you’re better than anything I could’ve ever dreamed of. I can’t imagine what my life would’ve been like over the last four years without you; nor can I imagine my life without you at any point for the rest of my life. So…”

He pulled the box from his pocket and dropped to one knee.

“Will you marry me?”

She got up and rushed towards him. When she was near enough, she hugged him, burying her face in his shoulder. He could feel tears flowing from her eyes. She held on for a long time. When she finally let go, she put her hands on his cheeks and looked deeply into his eyes.

“Yes! Yes, of course I will!” - she said in between sobs. He was crying too by this point, so just took her right hand from his cheek and slid the ring onto her finger, before kissing her. Their friends cheered, and somewhere in the background, all her favorite songs kept playing. This had gone exactly as he’d wanted; he couldn’t have imagined it any better.

5

He stood a little nervously at the arbor. Any second now, she would be there, about to walk up the aisle towards him. He took a deep breath in and out. They’d saved up money for a while for this, invited all of their families and their friends; this was to be a perfect day. Although, he thought, every day since he’d been with her had been perfect anyway. 

There she was. Tears formed involuntarily in his eyes - she was just too beautiful to witness calmly. She made her way slowly towards him, beaming, eyes sparkling, hair lying gracefully on the shoulders of her gorgeous white wedding dress. Her father by her side could not have looked any prouder if he’d tried. 

Now she was in front of him, and the officiant asked him the sacred question.

“I do” - he said, trying his best to keep the shakiness out of his voice. 

The same question was repeated to her.

“I do” - she said, also trying her very best to keep it together.

“You may now kiss the bride” - the officiant said. The couple clutched each other tightly, and their lips met. 

Later, as they danced, once again to all her favorite songs, he couldn’t help but think to himself about how much they didn’t hurt him anymore. Was he leaving his mother’s memory in the past? Was this wrong? Then, all of a sudden, he could have sworn that, over the shoulder of his now wife, he saw his mother, just as he remembered, dancing with everyone else. They made eye contact, and it was as if his mother was saying to him: “It’s okay. Let the weight go. I wouldn’t want you to be upset on my behalf.” And then…he let go. The weight came crashing down from his chest, like a piece of an iceberg breaking off and sinking into the ocean. All of a sudden, the memory of his mother wasn’t painful anymore - it was joyful and light, just like the music wrapped tightly around him and the woman he loved as they danced in the slowly dying light of their wedding day. All of a sudden, it was all so clear to him: these weren’t all her favorite songs; they were all their favorite songs.

6

He loved her taste in music. Every single song she’d play on the speaker in the kitchen as they tried to make dinner and not get too distracted by each other would make his soul sing along with it, blooming like a rose in early summer. Every single song made him think of how truly alive he felt next to her, just how much his life had been transformed with her in it, and he loved the feeling. Every single song was something that felt like it belonged to times spent in that college dorm common room, where they first met. Times which would accompany them for the rest of their lives. These songs used to be painful to him; he’d clench his teeth and roll his eyes, wishing it’d be over soon.

But now the pain was gone. Every note brought out her warm smile; every beat felt like the warm touch of her hand on his shoulder as she kissed him on the cheek; every melody sounded like her loving laugh as he twirled her around in mid-dance, dancing as well as he could while still trying to pay some attention to the cooking. It was all making him feel just perfect.

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

You may notice there's no names and minimal physical features mentioned in this story. Love doesn't have a face or a name, so I tried to make this story as universal as possible - what the main characters are called and what they look like is entirely up to you, dear reader. Thank you very much for reading this one, it's very different from my previous story, but one that I equally enjoyed writing. 

Tim