LR1 M1 | Duane vs. Murderous Goose

Written by Zenith

Another day in the SALT Diner once again. Tonio proceeds to cook food for the contestants in the restaurant. He rings a bell and places food by the counter. As if he was summoned by the noise, Duane moonwalks (assisted by his roller skates, of course) over to the counter to pick up the food.

Table 12, signore. It should be IGOR and King Knight’s order.

You got it!

Duane picks up the food and delivers it to Table B where the current patrons sit with patience... at least, one of them is.

Alright, two servings of fresh tamales!

Thank you, servant! I shall pay you a great amount for your efforts…

He turns to IGOR and whispers.

You're paying for this, correct?

bitch, you're a whole ass king.

Ah, no worries, dudes. It's on the house, contestant discount. Catch ya later!

As Duane speaks, the Murderous Goose appears behind the innocent boy, ready to attack. The goose charges forward and attempts to strike, but at the same time Duane bumps into the magical wizard Gandalf, causing him to accidentally cast a spell of ice.

Yow, sorry dude!

Well well, someone ought to be more careful. Who knows if that ice spell could have hit someone?

HONK! Honk- honk! (HELP! I mean- don't help! I can handle this on my own!)

Duane and Gandalf turn around to find the Goose stuck behind the ice. Its neck is caught inside an ice wall, almost like a cone you'd put on a dog.

Oh, it did manage to hit someone.

Uh oh, we gotta get it out of there!

Honk honk! (Once I break free from these shackles of ice, my wrath will ensue upon you, boy.)

You continue with your job, leave this to me.

If you say so. By the way, were you planning to order something?

I'm fine, thank you.

Cool beans.

Duane skates back to the counter, while Gandalf cautiously approaches the foul waterfowl.

Now then. I may not be the most agile or physically able person in this establishment, but do anything to the boy and we will have problems aplenty. Understand?

Honk. (Psh, yeah right. What can an old gaffer like you do?)

I can read your mind… creature. And I can do so many things unimaginable.

Gandalf waves his staff and flickers it, heating up the ice. However, the position of the wand is in a threatening way, as it’s held right up to the Goose’s neck. As the whole debacle of the ice continues, Duane picks up another order and delivers it to Ibuki and Spring Man.

Man, that whole concert at the Ribbon Ring was so cool! We were rockin’ out and they were like, “Grr, we’ll get you next time!” and we were like, “Haha, as if!”

I agree, you did a great job protecting the ring!

'Sup, I got the pizza you ordered!

Oh, sweet! Thanks, Duane.

Just as Duane is about to hand over the pizza, the Goose attempts another sneak attack on Duane. The plan backfires, as Duane is startled by the sense of the Goose's presence, which makes him lose his grip on the pizza box out of surprise. Fortunately, Spring Man is able to catch it by extending his arms. He punches the Goose as well, and catches the pizza with little to no effort.

Phew, that was a close one!

Oh man, I would’ve been totally fired if that dropped. Thanks, Spring Man!

Anytime. Anyways, Ibuki, we should head to the dining room.

Mhm!

Spring Man and Ibuki head off to the cafeteria and Duane goes back to the kitchen. Before leaving the dormitory halls, Murderous Goose catches his attention.

Honk honk! (ENOUGH!)

Huh?

Duane turns around to find the Goose standing behind him in the corridor. It does not look pleased.

Hey, lil' Goose dude. Anything I can get for ya?

Honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk honk.
(The amount of times you have humiliated me has increased, boy. It's about time you face the wrath of a go-)