The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem
According to Branden, the six pillars of self-esteem are:
The practice of living consciously. This means being aware of our thoughts, feelings, actions, and goals, and seeking to understand the reality of ourselves and the world. It also means being honest with ourselves and others, and accepting responsibility for our choices and consequences.
The practice of self-acceptance. This means accepting ourselves as we are, with our strengths and weaknesses, virtues and flaws, successes and failures. It also means respecting our needs and desires, and expressing them authentically.
The practice of self-responsibility. This means taking charge of our own life and well-being, and not blaming others or external factors for our problems or happiness. It also means being proactive in pursuing our goals and values, and fulfilling our obligations to ourselves and others.
The practice of self-assertiveness. This means standing up for ourselves and our rights, and expressing our thoughts, feelings, and opinions in a respectful and appropriate manner. It also means being true to ourselves and not compromising our integrity or values for the sake of pleasing others or avoiding conflict.
The practice of living purposefully. This means having a clear vision of what we want to achieve in life, and setting realistic and meaningful goals that reflect our values and interests. It also means taking action to pursue our goals and measuring our progress and results.
The practice of personal integrity. This means aligning our actions with our principles and convictions, and being consistent in our words and deeds. It also means honoring our commitments and promises, and being trustworthy and reliable.
Branden argues that these six practices are essential for building and sustaining a high level of self-esteem. He also provides exercises and guidelines on how to implement them in our daily lives.
The Importance of Self-Esteem
In his book, Branden also demonstrates compellingly why self-esteem is basic to psychological health, achievement, personal happiness, and positive relationships. He shows how self-esteem affects various aspects of our lives, such as:
The workplace. Self-esteem influences our motivation, performance, creativity, resilience, leadership, teamwork, communication, decision-making, problem-solving, and career satisfaction.
Parenting. Self-esteem influences how we raise our children, how we communicate with them, how we discipline them, how we support their development, how we model behavior for them, and how we foster their own self-esteem.
Education. Self-esteem influences how we learn, how we teach, how we interact with peers and teachers, how we cope with challenges and failures, how we pursue excellence, how we develop critical thinking skills, and how we value knowledge.
Psychotherapy. Self-esteem influences how we deal with psychological issues such as anxiety, depression, addiction, trauma, abuse, guilt, shame, anger, fear, loneliness, insecurity, low self-worth,
The culture at large. Self-esteem influences how we relate to society, how we participate in social and political issues, how we respect human rights and diversity, how we contribute to the common good, and how we create a better world.
Branden also warns of the dangers of low self-esteem, such as self-sabotage, self-destructive behavior, irrationality, violence, prejudice, intolerance, corruption, and tyranny.
Conclusion
The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem is a comprehensive and insightful book that offers a practical and effective approach to enhancing self-esteem. It is based on decades of clinical practice and research by Nathaniel Branden, who is widely recognized as one of the foremost experts on self-esteem. It is essential reading for anyone with a personal or professional interest in self-esteem, or anyone who wants to improve their quality of life and well-being.
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