PERSPECTIVE V - Terminus

This is the final article in the PERSPECTIVE series. 

This article may just be the most important one in the series. In fact, this article may be the most important news article in VoD history. The ramifications of this article are immense; it has the capacity to end the careers of all the people mentioned within it - it may even cause a VoNC. The power of this article is so titanic that multiple people have stated that the Constitution should be repealed and replaced with this article.

Anyways, today we’re ranking the favourite dinosaurs of the four people interviewed in this series, along with the favourite dinosaurs of the three employees of Bird’s Word. I will be listing these dinosaurs in ascending order based on how much I like them.

7. Chief Justice Hackerman - Stegosaurus

“Stegosaurus.”

The Stegosaurus is a basic bitch pick. Its the biggest fraud out of all the herbivore dinosaurs - its a big lizard with fucking nacho chips on its back. Hacker also didn’t even bother to give me his reasoning as to why the Stegosaurus is his favourite.

6. Speaker Griffey - Stegosaurus

“Stegosaurus. VoD national Animal”

If the Stegosaurus has a million haters, I am one of them. If the Stegosaurus has a hundred haters, I am one of them. If the Stegosaurus has one hater, it’s me. If the Stegosaurus has zero haters, I’m dead. The only reason that Griffeys pick is above Hackers is because Griffey gave reasoning for his choice.

5. Stinky Gayboy Prime Minister Noll - Stegosaurus

“Stegosaurus but literally just because of that stupid meme from a while back about that guy putting a stegosaurus on the Irish flag because it's his favourite dinosaur. I don't know why I found that so funny but I do and therefore the stegosaurus is also my favourite dinosaur.”

WHY DOES THIS STUPID FRAUD ASS FUCK KEEP SHOWING UP IN THIS LIST. I’m done. At least Noll gave better reasoning than the other two - I have not seen the meme but I respect his reasoning more than “VoD national animal”.

4. Editor Muggy - Suchomimus

“its cool and was good at hunting. its also a tropical girlie.”

This one was a hard one to rank due to the fact that I know nothing about it, but it looks cool so it automatically goes higher than the FUCKING STEGOSAURUS. However, I am not the biggest Theropod fan so I put the Suchomimus below the next three.

3. Assistant Pigeon - Dilophosaurus

“This goofy fuck”

The Diplo is certainly a unique pick, and I am fond of their appearance in the Jurassic Park movies. However, because I am a massive fucking nerd Pigeon gets subtracted points because he sent me a photo of the Diplo from Jurassic Park and that representation of the Diplo is wholly scientifically accurate. There’s no evidence that they could shoot venom, or that they had those massive frills on their head. If he had sent a proper photo of the Diplo, it probably would have been second - the Diplo is a good pick.

2. President Momo - Brachiosaurus

“My favorite dinosaur is the Brachiosaurus because my brother and I used to play with his dinosaur figurines, so I always chose the long neck dinosaurs. I also think they're some of the most interesting due to their size, and the fact that they kind of remind me of giraffes.”

The Brachiosaurus is a good pick - I am a big fan of Sauropods and herbivores in general. It just seems chill as fuck and seems like it would be cool to meet irl. I also like the story of playing with her brother's toys - good touch. And the President is right, Sauropods do tend to be quite interesting due to their enormous size.

1. King of VoD Birdish - Ankylosaurus

“It’s my list of course I’m gonna put my favourite in first place.”

This motherfucker was a goddamn TANK. Full, nearly impenetrable, body armour with spikes as well. No predator was able to penetrate that shell (once they were fully grown) - there is ZERO adult Ankylosaurus fossils that had T-Rex bite marks on it, which is a testament to how fucking defensive they were. And not only do they have the best defence stat of the prehistoric era, they also had a FUCKING MACE on their tails. That tail club was reinforced with stiff, interlocking vertebrae that gave them one of the most powerful attacks in the game. There are ZERO adult Ankylosaurus fossils that had T-Rex bite marks on it - a testament to how fucking defensive they were. Trust me when I say that there is no way in hell that your favourite dinosaur could kill an adult Ankylosaurus. 

Also they were cute asf.

And that concludes the PERSPECTIVE series. I still stand by what I said about this article being able to end careers - Noll, Griffey and Hacker should be impeached for their picks. This was a fun series to write but from now on Muggy will be taking over the articles whilst I do approval polling - she already did a lot of work on this series already so she deserves it.