PARALUMAN: AN ANTHOLOGY CRYSTALLIZING WOMEN
From Backstage to Centerstage
by Camille Marie Uy | Published March 2021
PARALUMAN: AN ANTHOLOGY CRYSTALLIZING WOMEN
by Camille Marie Uy | Published March 2021
ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Camille Marie Uy is a batch 2020 alumna of Philippine Cultural College-Manila. She was a varsity member of the PCC Glee Club, the PCC Pep Squad, and she was the Filipino Feature and Literary editor of Tanglaw. Through the years, she has competed and won several singing and writing competitions. She also holds the titles Binibining Wika 2019 and Ms. APPSAM Teen Personality 2019. Presently, she is taking up AB Communication Arts at De La Salle University.
Every child is a dreamer. Ask one child what he/she wants to be when he/she grows up, and that child will answer you with sparkles in his/her eyes. Some boys would say they want to become doctors, while some, Power Rangers; some girls would say they want to become teachers, while some, princesses. I had mine too. But in my long list of things I dreamt of becoming in the future, a beauty queen would probably be one of the last. That’s the fun thing about life, I guess—you never know where it will take you.
I never really knew that beauty pageants existed until I was in elementary. I remember seeing Ms. Venus Raj on TV and not knowing what Miss Universe Philippines meant. It wasn’t a big deal since I wasn’t really the girly-girl type of kid. Even in the annual Mr. and Ms. PCC pageants, I wasn’t really excited about it; until 8th grade, that is. In 8th grade, our batch representative for the pageant was a close friend of mine, so I came and screamed my lungs out for her. Somehow, I had a glimpse of the process from the preparations to the coronation night. I fell in love. The pageant was now something I looked forward to. The following year, our batch representative for the pageant was another close friend of mine. This time, I was more involved in the preparations. I was there as they planned and practiced for it, and I helped as much as I could. The next two years, I became even more involved in our batch representatives’ preparations for the pageants. Being a stagehand sincerely made me happy.
Weeks before the last year of my high school journey began, I promised myself that I would make the most out of the year by seizing every opportunity given to me so that I wouldn’t have any regrets. Little did I know, so much awaited me that year. Around two months into the school year, our class adviser told me that he wanted me to represent our class in a small pageant for the Buwan ng Wika program. I was hesitant at first because I was always just a backstage person in pageants, and I wasn’t sure if I could do it, but I remembered my promise to myself and took the challenge. The few weeks of planning, training, and rehearsing went by so fast that we were already on the day of the pageant before I knew it. So many thoughts flashed through my mind. I was already thinking of what I would do if I forgot the choreography, if I slipped on stage, or if my mind suddenly went blank for the question-and-answer portion. But I just wanted to enjoy the ride. I didn’t want to have regrets and I didn’t want to let the people who believed in me down. So I went on stage, enjoyed every single second of the experience, and I just lifted everything to God. I still don’t know how it happened, but before I came home, I was already Binibining Wika 2019.
Later that day, I received messages from two teachers asking me to represent the school for a national pageant. I knew about the event because I was already set to participate in it, but I was registered in the poetry writing contest and not in the pageant. This time, I was even more hesitant to join. This was an interschool competition, and I knew how seriously the other schools took this pageant. I didn’t want to make a fool of myself. I told the teachers that I was afraid and that I couldn’t do it, but they really made me feel their faith in me. I didn’t want to let them down. I thought, what was there to lose? So I kept my promise of seizing every opportunity and took the challenge. I only had two nights to prepare because that was a Tuesday, and we were leaving for Baguio city on Thursday to have the pageant on Friday. I felt so much pressure knowing that I was now carrying the name of the school. Nevertheless, I couldn’t let the people who believed in me down. I couldn’t let the school down. I told myself that I would just give it my all and have fun, so that whatever happened, I wouldn’t have any regrets. Time went by so fast that in just the blink of an eye, I was already on stage, feeling the proudest that I could be, representing my beloved alma mater, Philippine Cultural College-Manila. As crazy as it was, the night ended with me having four sashes across my chest, with one being Ms. APPSAM Teen Personality 2019.
My greatest takeaway from this experience is that we always have to be ready to take risks. Had I let my fear get the best of me, I would’ve let such a rare opportunity go to waste. It’s true that no matter how much and how many people believe in you, it won’t mean anything if you don’t believe in yourself. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that I could be a titleholder of two pageants. It still feels surreal. I’ve said this countless times, and I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of repeating this. Throughout that crazy journey, the one thing I’m most grateful for is having people who believed in me and supported me from the very beginning to the very end. My heart is overflowing with gratitude because I wouldn’t have had the courage to do it if it were not for them. And, of course, I’m grateful to myself because I did not confine myself to what I thought was the limit of my capabilities. Otherwise, I probably wouldn’t be as proud of myself as I am now. Quoting Lewis Carroll: “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take.”