(You bring the) devil out in me

Artist:
Howie St. John

Released:
24th June 1974

Label:
Collective records

Description:
This record is a rarity, so rare in fact that we do not even know if it actually exists!?

You will have to bare with me on this one. Get this.

Although never proven, Aleister Crowley himself was said to have recorded a demon's voice onto a wax cylinder during an occult ritual in 1915. Later, before the original wax cylinder completely deteriorated and was lost forever, it was transferred and hidden into the then modern 7 inch single format as safe storage. And, guess what? It is suppose to be hidden in a single called, appropriately enough, "(You bring the) devil out in me" ha ha ha.

It is said that if the track was played to someone then they would die 30 days from the day of hearing the hidden demon's voice. The only escape was to play the voice to someone else and pass the curse onto them!

SPOOKY !!!!!111!1

So best avoided I reckon!

Only kestrels hover

Artist:
Baz Heinz

Released:
12th April 1973

Label:
Falco tinnunculus

Description:
A curate's egg of a piece. On the face of it a bubblegum pop tune. The lyrics however describe the turbulent rise through adolescence into the stalled life of an adult. The apparent response to the adulthood's woes being to live the rest of life inside an insidious and violent cult feeding on weaker members of society.

All my socks are odd

Artist:
Barry Cream

Released:
18 Aug 1976

Label:
Spinning Flares

Description:
The late summer release saw Barry Cream crooning his way to number 36 in the UK charts and number 5 in the US charts. Barry had stepped away from his Elvis impersonation act to create this masterpiece. A low simmering stew pot of brassy notes and acidic lyrics including the line “I never buy odd socks so why do I have so many?”

At the height of his fame, he was rumoured to be dating starlet Twiggy, but his untimely death in a chairlift tragedy in the Italian alps put paid to him climbing the fame ladder and completing his first album “Can I have a spoon with that?”

I read there were some copies of the album tracks taken directly from the mixing desk in tight circulation, but I haven’t yet had the privilege to hear any. Please get in touch if you hear of any.

I love beagles nearly as much as I love you

Artist:
Sally Dewberry

Released:
7 February 1971

Label:
Dirty Muffins

Description:
Sally released this single hoping to cash in on Valentine’s Day purchases, but her love of dogs, and in particular, beagles unnerved the record buying population.

It was lines like “I let him lick the inside of my mouth, but I won’t do that with you down south” and “I like the smell of his wet coat compared to him you’re a fat fucking goat” that really upset the British public and a young Mary Whitehouse had it banned before it even featured on Top of the Pops. Apparently only 6000 copies were pressed.

I have a copy and I’ve made a duplicate on tape because it is really special to me as I have a beagle called “Lee Majors” and I don’t want to wear out the record.

Frogs ain’t fer eatin

Artist:
Eric “Fat Neck” Vance and the Lenovo quartet

Released:
23 March 1977

Label:
Christmas Teapot

Description:
Fat Neck (as he liked to be called) came joint third on New Faces with “I do like a meat pie” in 1975 and then continued his career in holiday camps and the club circuit.

Real fame didn’t strike until this, his first single in 1977 when he joined up with another New Faces contestant; a trio calling themselves “The Lenovo Quartet”.

Fat Neck was born in Doncaster but always protested he was an American, he even doctored his birth certificate to change “Doncaster” to “Nashville” and was duly refused a passport putting paid to his attempt to join the growing number of artists on cruise ships.

In 1980 he changed his name to Dave went back to driving for Eddie Stobbart.