YOU'D BE NOTHING WITHOUT ME.
YOU'D BE NOTHING WITHOUT ME.
TABLE OF CONTENTS.
01. difficult vs likeable person tests.
02. what tragic horror trope are you?
03. what type of symphony are you?
04. where does your fear reside in your body?
05. what would you be the god of?
06. what colour is your aura?
07. scary aesthetics.
08. what kind of weather are you?
09. what kind of villain are you?
10. what do you need?
11. olympian aesthetics.
12. how do strangers perceive you?
13. if you were a deity, what would you be the god of?
14. what part of this haunted house are you?
15. what's peculiar about your soul?
16. how are you ruined?
17. why did the author kill you off?
18. assigned a love language.
19. what type of lonely are you?
20. once stripped clean, what's at your core?
21. tough & soft aesthetics.
22. how is your soul percieved?
23. what body part are you?
24. what's your underlying motif?
25. what kind of love are you?
26. what popular cowboy archetype are you?
difficult ( left ): you are a very difficult person to get along with ( 62.86%. )
likeable ( right ): you are a somewhat likeable person ( 45%. )
the ghost — it's an odd thing, to feel so far from grounded and yet trapped, tethered, unable to escape. there's more you have to do! so why can't you move? i'm sure you have an answer to that, at the very least in the back of your mind. people love to say that ghosts hold grudges or haunt for revenge but they always get it wrong; you're stuck because something or someone chained you down and left you there. you try and reach out to all those bright people who pass through your life, but it rarely feels like it does much more than knock a cup off the table, blow some papers into the air. i need you to trust me - they see it. they're listening. they'll keep looking for you and, eventually, they'll be able to see you too.
the nocturne: the rise — there is a darkness which has tormented you, and the genius lament burdens you, but fear not... you are the pull of the tide and the light of the moon on a winter path. you are the soft notes which increase in intensity till the pianist pours over the keys with such passion it can only bring tears to your eyes. you cannot do things halfway though you yearn for it, and you envy those blessed with blissful ignorance, but in the end you know you'd not have it any other way — you are the rise they are afraid of till they cannot look away. your song : nocturne in c minor by chopin.
somewhere else — what is known is what is safe. your fear is never inside you, always somewhere else. your home is the best place in the world; all other places are scary. the people you already know are better than anyone else. so you go on, playing with broken toys, wearing dead people's clothes. you can be torn down to shreds, abused, tortured and miserable. but at least you know where it comes from, which gives you a sense of comfort and even control. the unknown hides dangers you don't understand, so it scares you. but alongside the dangers, you miss the wonder, adventures and opportunities that you could've otherwise had. my guess is that you've dealt with grief and loss.
the revenant — at some point in recent years, you suffered what felt to you like a 'death', whether creative, social, emotional, spiritual or even literal, and you've been reborn. this reincarnation didn't come easy, and you're not entirely the person you were, but you sloughed yourself out of your figurative grave with the kind of vigour only a phoenix could have. when you sleep, you dream strange and vivid dreams, and your gaze now holds a certain intensity. when something takes your attention, it doesn't let go. your kindness is endless, as is your love for vast things like the sea, the sky and the stars. you have a certain unshakable fixation with religion or higher powers, and the prospect of death doesn't scare you. in fact, you feel less fear than you should, and you've never felt more alive than you do now. as a deity, you're the god of life and death, of moving on, of growth and of courage.
— sage / / herb clippings, macha, bullet journals, mini backpacks, needlefelts, pistachio, laptop stickers. your essence is sage: you are introspective and retreating. everything is organised and planned ahead; you are meticulous, stacking up a card tower you can't let fall. it is difficult for you to untwist your tongue and tell others you need them. you are the observer. you are the writer gone off alone. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of green, forest, honeysuckle, and seafoam, who share your guarded nature. you are also drawn to the self-expressive sky and apricot, who will help you grow and embolden you to say what you need. however, you may struggle to get along with the overly-emotional personalities of rose and cream who ask you to be too vulnerable.
07.
𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬.
bloodied knuckles / tear-stained cheeks / rust / a busted lip / claws / fangs / a bloody nose / chattering teeth / a dark space underneath the bed / scratching noises on a wall / creaking metal / fog / dancing under moonlight / blood dripping lips / heavy breathing in the dark / a feeling of unexplained dread / a figure in a dark corner / dirty peeling wallpaper / a bloody hand print on the wall / sobbing in the dark / bite marks on the skin / eerie whispers / a hood covering a stranger’s eyes / the growl of a hidden animal / the sound of a blade being sharpened / a deep, dark forest / walking on the streets alone at night / a cobweb-filled, abandoned building / eyes darting in paranoia / a heavy beating pulse / the feeling of being trapped / struggling to get out a scream / boards covering broken windows / a quiet graveyard / a gas station in the middle of nowhere / a road that never ends / heavy fog rolling in / the scent of blood in the air / eerie old photographs / walking along train tracks at night / a chill going up the spine / gathering crows / a dusty, dimly lit study / mist over a deserted cobblestone street / ghost towns / shadows around a campfire / the sound of chanting / church bells tolling / an orange harvest moon / a broken down carnival / a dirty stuffed animal abandoned / wiping bloody hands on fabric / nightmares / waking up in a panic / a power outage / heavy lightning storms / a secret trap door / the feeling of being watched / fear from trauma / a ouija board set out on a table / an eerie doll / a scream of anguish and pain / withered plants / a room that’s been forgotten and gathered dust / owl eyes in the dark / curled, dead tree branches / a ritual altar / flickering candles / a lantern held up in the dark / fear of being followed / creaking floorboards / repressed, horrible memories / clenched teeth / soft, echoing piano keys / an old book covered in dust / many pairs of glaring eyes / stumbling in pitch black darkness / being stranded in the middle of nowhere / tarot cards on a table / a trail of blood.
foggy — you've never felt as alone as you do now, but maybe you've always felt like this. it doesn't matter if you're with a group or by yourself, the loneliness stays with you always, it's seeped into your bones. or has it? are you as alone as you think or are you clinging on to this pit inside you like it has the answers? it doesn't, know that. it's okay to feel joy again, it's okay to feel okay.
righteously evil — you've been hurt. what you're doing is wrong. there is no doubt. but it's what you need to do. you were not going to roll over and let it just happen. so you did what you had to. and you will continue doing what you had to. when you die, its with fury in your eyes. your opponent says you're stubborn, having kept this up for this long. you laugh, and spit in their face. you curse them until your very last breath.
somnolence — you are so tired. you keep going and going and its killing you. you feel pushed to keep going but you are exhausted, barely clinging on. you need rest before you drain yourself completely.
11.
𝐨𝐥𝐲𝐦𝐩𝐢𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬.
aphrodite. laughter-loving, sweet smiles, dressed in silk and satin, flower in their hair, sees the world as a runway, unapologetically sexual, the sea washing their ankles, in love with love, stirrer of passion, cunning concealed by painted lips, secret daggers, doves, revolution in their kiss, delighting in the waves, flirtatious winks, strolling along the beach, staring wistfully from a balcony, this is how to be a heartbreaker, wants to be adored, gets turned on by danger.
apollo. glitz and glamour, art galleries, turning the volume up, being made of gold, neatly-organized music sheets, notebooks filled with poetry, bathing in the sunlight, the powerful urge to create, collecting vinyl records, beautiful cover of wonderwall, playing multiple instruments, tasting like sunshine, healing touch, speaking in prophecies, smile mingled with wrath, shunning lies, sporting shades, hanging out at music festivals with their friends, sleeps naked, arrow to the heart, paint brushes, probably has a tinder account.
ares. armed for battle, wants to raise a dog with their significant other, soft spot for children, gives piggyback rides, scarred body, blood on their hands and face, willing to fight the world for the ones they love, fights against injustice, warm hugs, well-worn combat boots, boxing gloves, bandages wrapped around bruised knuckles, fist raised in protest, ignites revolutions, fear is a prison, more sensitive than what their tough shell would have you think, exhausted, damaged goods, force to be reckoned with, red roses, curses under their breath.
artemis. keen sense of a hunter, freckles like constellations on their skin, piercing eyes, dishevelled braid, moonlight peeking through the shadows, the calm of the forest at night, lying on the grass and staring at the stars, mother doe and her fawn, protecting their kin, the moon shimmering on a still lake, quiver full of arrows resting against the bark of a tree, running with wolves, bonding while circled around a campfire, not being much of a people person, arrow hitting a target, popping egos, patience on 3%, touches heaven and returns howling.
athena. discerning gaze, unreadable face, quiet museums, owl perched on their finger, armour that intimidates, eye for architecture, plays the sims for the sole purpose of building houses, studied the blade while everyone else was busy getting laid, big fan of logic, loves brain teasers, ancient buildings, sweaters in neutrals and cool colours, hair done up, can kill you with their brain, heads to the library often to research, sharpened pencils, abs that can cut steel, stoic statues, pottery classes.
demeter. soil-covered hands, smile that can bloom flowers, skin loved by the sun, being the mom-friend, can lift you and your friends, flowers kept in the pockets of overalls, takes pride in their beautiful garden, speaks to their plants, leaves rustling in the wind, stalks of wheat, picking fruit, greenhouses, heart as strong as a mountain, values simplicity, daisies dotted across a collarbone, curls crowned with flowers, folded pile of sweaters in warm hues, pulling out fresh-baked bread out of the oven and the smell wafting through the air.
dionysus. drunk shitposter, on their sixth glass of wine before you’ve even finished your second, seductive smirks, untamed curls, rich fabrics on dark skin, sleek-furred panthers, theatre masks, stage productions, receiving a standing ovation, rose caught between their teeth, being the baby of the bunch, wild parties that last from sundown to sunup, creeping vines, inspiring loyalty, grand opera houses, masquerade balls, rolls of film, shattered chandeliers with broken glass scattered across the wine-spilled floor, pouring champagne into flutes, lives for the applause.
hephaestus. the calloused hands of someone who knows labour, sweaty brow, flame burning in their eyes, inventive mind, broad shoulders, steampunk goggles, nuts and bolts stored away in little boxes, ashes, striking a match, blueprints for future projects, fixing up a busted up car and giving it cool upgrades, wrestles with bitterness, work boots have seen better years, wrinkled plaid shirts, iron melted in blazing fire, huge jackets, crafting masterpieces, greased-stained overalls, fascination with robotics, pain is fuel, stack of weaponry, even their muscles have muscles.
hera. resting bitch face, dressed to the nines, cows grazing on a pasture, cool rain, loving and hating fiercely, hand clutching a string of pearls, large chandelier with glittering crystals, plays the sims for the sole purpose of killing off their sims, romance to realism, pictures of the sky while flying on a plane, files that under fuck it, downs glasses of wine as they relax with a scented bubble bath and netflix, like their selfie or you’re grounded, knows 57 convenient ways to murder a man, dark eyes that penetrate your soul, marble and gold.
hermes. devil-may-care smile, always up-to-date on the latest technology, will steal your french fries, does it for the vine, shitposter, puts googly eyes on everything, meme hoarder, long drives on the highway, ma and pop diners, spontaneous road trips, folded maps, fingers dancing across the keyboard of a laptop, shooting hoops on the basketball court, chatting up strangers as you all journey to your own destinations, goes jogging in the morning, mixes redbull with coffee, menace on april fool’s, hoodies and sneakers.
poseidon. storm with skin, colorful coral reefs, waves crashing against the shore, stroking the soft fur of a cat, their heart pounding as their horse’s gentle trot speeds into a gallop, tousled locks, clothes smeared with paint, owns several sketchbooks yet always yearns to own more, leather jackets, fondness for diy projects, handwriting that flows across the page, nimble fingers playing the strings of a violin, velvety singing voice that haunts your dreams, mood as ever-changing as the sea, the roar of a motorcycle, compass with a spinning arrow.
zeus. thunder in their heart, running on coffee, flash of lightning, natural charisma, eloquence, badass in a nice suit, aficionado of history, force of nature, lenny face, nightmare-filled nights, proud arm around their lover’s waist, high-rise buildings, planes soaring through a cloudless sky, technician on the piano, maintains order, strong handshake, juggling multiple events on their busy schedule with ease, expensive watch.
scary dog privilege — loud music. laughing at bad horror movies. comfort through sitting in silence together. deep, Intricate forests and dark shades of green and purple. your best feature is probably a birthmark, or maybe your nose. you often look stoic, but when you do smile, it lights up your whole face. you're observant. you probably have a soft spot for kids. for someone who looks so scary, you have this innate way of making people feel so safe. you're a natural protector. you just want people to have it better than you did. your kindness is subtle. not everyone will see it. but it's the cause of so much healing. even more than you can see.
nightmares and discord — your intensity is fearsome. when you feel hurt you don’t often seek out equal and fair revenge but rather drown them in hysteria and watch them burn. you’re temperamental and your emotions are on display for the world to see. you’re the last one any human would want to upset, because even though death would not directly befall them, doom and chaos would ensue, surrounding their life until their death.
the stairs — there’s something eerie about this house, something wholly unfamiliar in the familiar. you’ve always been aware of it, of everything just a little too much. you’ve seen how this house sinks its teeth into whatever passes through it because you are the passage that connects one to the other. so you know how this ends — when someone believes they can tame a predator, and now you must sit back in and watch as they become the newest prey. you have a good heart, or what is left of it, but you learned the hard way to put yourself first in a place like this. so make no mistake, when the third step from the top creaks it is not without purpose. you are a bridge, at the end of the day, the intermediate between the familiar and then unknown. a staircase goes both up and down, after all.
your soul is... volatile — there is a deep, painful energy harboured within this soul... at its very core festers malice, and a deeply rooted pain that craves nothing more but to inflict itself onto everything around it. special care has been given to it - to stop examiners from coming into any harm should they draw too near to it. you coil like a serpent, awaiting a moment to strike. to claim your revenge. it never comes.
ruined by fear — you live on the edge of your seat, but it is not a good thing. you’re constantly looking over your shoulder, unsure of what will hurt you next. you have been hurt so much, but you refuse to adapt to your pain. instead, you avoid what you cannot control. you are so afraid of making a mistake, of being brought closer to your doom. but, despite this, you cannot articulate what you fear. you are just afraid. only afraid. and you will be afraid until you are brought to what you fear.
plot twist: you didn’t die — maybe the story starts with the hero finding out you died, or maybe you're dragged off screen just before a gunshot. or, possibly, you suffer a wound that no mortal could possibly survive. then, in the hero's most desperate hour ( or just in time for sequel bait ), you'll reappear to save the day. something makes you stronger than most, or perhaps there was simply a grand, miserable sort of miscommunication regarding your status. nonetheless, just about everyone will be happy to see you, and more than happy to hear the story of how you survived. just hope that the author won't make a habit of this - otherwise no one will know what to do when you die for real.
a story that ends in blood — the world has always been unkind, and when you have turned to yourself for comfort you have come face to face with an empty pit which seems to be laughing. you don’t care if it kills you but once you find someone whom you love and who loves you back, you will make sure nothing happens to them. they are yours. you will make a tear in this world and create a new place for you and your love if it comes to that. because it has always been about love, and it is how it always ends.
loneliness born of anger — you learned from a young age, you are not like others, and others hate you for it. you've been mocked and tormented your whole life, and it birthed a violence in your heart. you yell at your younger siblings when they slip up. you don't want them to suffer the same fate you did. at once, you are both miles above and miles below your peers. you are not polite. people no longer dislike you because of you, but for your biting words. it's better this way, after all. at least now you know it's your own fault.
acerbic wit: you're a mentor — an old scarred wolf, an injured soldier, a disgraced paladin. your teachings read as shamelessly pretentious, speaking in rhymes and biting down hard into anyone stupid enough to make the wrong move. this isn't your first life, nor your second, nor your sixth — you'll make the most of your time shackled to this world, no matter how many loops it takes to get it right. with every defeat, you reincarnate; a little smarter, a little quicker, crueler and nastier. will you choose to be brutal, equalizing, that final strike in the face of your enemies? will you go soft, become tender and domesticated? the choice is yours. it's not like i can stop you.
21.
𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 & 𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐚𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐬.
bold what applies to your muse. italicize for what sometimes applies.
𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥:
bruised knuckles. bloody noses. eye-rolling. empty bottles. messy hair. sarcasm. lip biting. unwashed jeans. coffee breath. loud music. broken neon signs. chipped nail polish. leather jackets. always wearing headphones. swearing. sneaking out at 3 am. dark lipstick. frown creases. burning cigarettes. plaid shirts. under-eye circles. dark colours.
𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞:
honey tea. flower crowns. giggling. blowing kisses. dancing without worries. white lace. soft textures. fluffy throw pillows. using too many heart emojis. empathy. constant daydreaming. handwritten letters. fairy lights. bullet journals. designated driver. warm hugs. garden picnics. quiet. smile lines. optimism. flowy clothes. pastel colors.
the strong-willed — your soul has touched darkness and so you learned to wrap yourself within it. you felt fear and decided you would never let it control you again. you’re not always all sharp edges and cool stares, but you refuse to be prey again. you turned your teeth into fangs so you would be the one to bite. you learned to growl louder than all the predators who stole your innocence. it may seem like you don’t care, sometimes you try to pretend you don’t, but i see the way you sharpen your knives when the ones you care about are hurting.
hands — hands can do so much, they’re extremely versatile much like yourself. they can nourish, they can pray, they can comfort. but we both know that’s not what you use yours for, is it? you know as well as i do how hands can maim, can strangle, can destroy. they are unthinking and unfeeling, and unlike the others they do not act off instinct but off of command. every act you commit is purposeful, filled with an intent, sometimes to be cruel and sometimes to be kind. you know who is deserving of your hurt, who is deserving of your love. always make sure you can tell them apart before you wrap those hands around them.
the lightning rod — whether it’s your turbulent nature, your flash quick mind, or the air of unknown about you, your undercurrent is the lightning rod. you are somewhat unpredictable, but if we unravelled you we’d see you know exactly what you’re doing, but it makes you feel less vulnerable to pretend it wasn’t planned. some people stay back from you, but others would follow you cross country, for the very same reason. they don’t know enough about you. the difference is in who wants to learn more. keep your golden nature, it’s exciting, but don’t be afraid to admit what you know. matshona dhliwayo said “ lightning strikes but does not roar, ” your bite will always be worse than your bark, keep that close to your chest.
love as a flaw — cowering, your love hides in the dark. in shadows and under cover of night, your love runs from corner to corner, afraid to linger, afraid to be caught. afraid, afraid, afraid of everything. when you fall in love, it is with alarm bells ringing. your love is a mistake, a flaw in the code, a purchase you don’t remember making and desperately want to return. you didn’t ask for this. you didn’t want this. it’s a problem–– your problem–– and you would do anything to pass it off, burn it away, scoop it out of you with bare hands, or carved out with hooked knives before it can destroy you. get it out, just get it out now. you don’t care who you hurt in the process, only that you can’t afford to be hurt first. being loved by you is to be loved by a figment of the imagination. it is to be loved in halves, or not at all.
the drifter — you've got nothing to lose, and really nothing to gain, so you spend your days with your horse riding along the plains. you're super self sustaining and own a harmonica (or some sort of instrument you can easily play on your own.) animals tend to be better companions for you than people, but one day you might find the right person that fits with you when you stumble onto their ranch scaring off coyotes. you're typically quiet, more into listening to others than talking about yourself, but despite all that you've got mighty interesting stories from your travels.