Autobiographical Essays

Beate Caspari-Rosen, MD (1910 - 1995)


You Cannot Escape Fate


I watch every step I take. Don't trip over the electric wire! Watch the step! Don't slip on the wet floor! Yet, while observing all these precautions the little demons still caught me.


When I visited my daughter several weeks ago I stayed in a motel. Her house is not air conditioned and Whitney Center has spoiled me. I found that the motel's bathtub had no railing to hold on to while taking a shower. However, with proper care I managed not to have an accident. On Labor Day weekend I visited the children again. When I registered at the motel I told the management that the bathtub that I had used the last time was unsafe for all guests. They offered me a room for the handicapped and assured me that the bathroom was large and had a “safe” bathtub. I booked the handicapped room. To my surprise the room had other safety measures. Since they anticipate that a handicapped person uses a wheelchair everything is adjusted accordingly. Electric switches are low, the furniture is lower than usual, and the bed is low. And that is where the demon got me. When I was ready to go to sleep I wanted to sit down on the bed. My bed at home is rather high and my reflexes were not used to crouching  to sit on side of the mattress. Thus my right leg twisted under me and I felt something tear around a knee. Who could have foreseen this? Now I walk in pain with a cane and hope I can drag myself to the writing group. There is no escape. The demons will get you every time.