Tips To Be a Positive Parent
Before we talk about how to be a peaceful parent, it is worth mentioning three parts which constitute peaceful parenting.
- This parenting style requires parents to be good at regulating their own emotions.
- Peaceful parenting focuses on building and strengthening relationship and connection between children and parents.
- Peaceful parents love their children unconditionally. It means that ‘love withdrawal’ is not practiced, and children are not rewarded with love and attention when they do something worth praising. Love and attention remains consistent.
If you are able to make these three parts the default elements of your parenting style, you are a peaceful parent. But the question remains here is that how you can transform into peaceful parent. Well, there are some ways to do that.
Regulate your own emotions
Instead of absorbing emotions in order to breathe a firestorm upon getting filled or acting upon every bad emotion immediately, you should find a way to regulate your emotions. Try to remain calm and think about the reasons you are getting these emergency alarms. The root causes are usually covered with the wrapping of emotions. Calming techniques can help you unwrap the root cause, and you will be able to think about the solutions rather than screaming or acting out against your own kids.
Evaluate your knowledge and perception about parenting
This evaluation should be carried out while keeping one thing in consideration; i.e. do your teachings tell you form close connection with your kid? If the lessons you have been learning tell you to be punitive at first place in order to discipline your kids, you better forget this lesson as soon as you can. Peaceful parenting is majorly about building connection with your kid. And the fact is that peaceful parenting has proved to be the best parenting method.
Set limits but be empathic
It’s the job of parents to set limits because it’s the limits which help in disciplining the kids. But you don’t want your children to hate those limits either. The major drawback of punitive parenting is that the limits set under this style make the children either completely submissive or highly rebellious. Peaceful parenting, on the other hand, focuses on telling the children the limits they should not cross in very empathic manner. Sometimes, the children may be asked about their opinions when the limitations are set. This opinion seeking process invokes logical thinking process in children as they ask questions or reasons for the limits being set.
Defiance can be the real problem
Sometimes, the kid may refuse to accept any limit and show rebelliousness straight away. This behavior should serve as an ultimate alarm that something is not right in the relationship between you and your child. In that scenario, you can step back a little and start thinking about reconnecting with your kid. Remember, properly connected children may ask the reasons for the decisions you take but they are less likely to show defiance.