I think, therefore I am.

27/11/22

What is self-concept?

Self-concept is a term that is used to describe how we perceive ourselves. Who we think we are, what we think of our own behaviors, and how we think others see us is all a part of our self-concept. This idea was proposed by Carl Rogers in 1959 as part of his humanistic theory of personality development. Self-concept is affected by a lot of factors.

The self-concept has three main attributes: Self-esteem, self-image, and ideal self. All these answer the question: Who am I? 

While your self-esteem is how you accept and value yourself and is usually based on how others see you and your societal role, self-image is how you view yourself in the now and this includes your personal take on your own behaviors and physical looks. Finally, your ideal self is who you want to be - a version of yourself that you want to attain.

The self-concept is incongruent. Its aspects aren't always equal and it doesn't always align with reality. How you perceive yourself may not be how you actually are perceived or how you actually present to the world. Our self-concept is ever-evolving and is easier to change when we're younger, but it is not a fixed mark. We can change it as we want at any stage in our lives just with a little work.

Why is self-concept important?

This concept is very important because it enlightens us about how we could be limiting ourselves solely by our thoughts. With a poor self-concept, we can suppress the best version of ourselves and never grow psychologically and with an overly rich self-concept, we can fail to see our own blind spots and stunt ourselves psychologically as well.  Balancing the self-concept can be quite challenging, but not for those who set their minds to it.

The change in balance (incongruence) of our self-concept can come from anything but especially when our ego is challenged. When someone challenges your skills or your character or something along those lines, your first instinct would be to defend yourself. In this defence, one either comes out even stronger in their conviction, or feeling less than. When our volatile ego takes any kind of blow, so does the self-concept. It is therefore imperative to always stay on top of the task of developing your self-concept. 

How to develop your self-concept

• Find out what the current status of your self-concept is.

• Understand why you feel that way about yourself. If it's really that deep, you're gonna have to go to therapy for help with this one, because like all things in behavioral psychology, it is linked to our childhood relationships with our parents.

•  Accept your thoughts. Instead of fighting, accept. Don't repel them so much that they bounce back. 

• Adjust your thoughts by challenging negative thinking.

There are many ways to challenge negative thinking. In a previous article, The power of manifesting, I talked about intention and affirmation. You might wanna check it out right now before going any further.

The reason why I'm mentioning this is that affirmations are highly ranked in combating negative thoughts. Recommended by many psychologists and behavioral experts alike, affirmations have been proven to help harness positive thoughts quicker than psychotherapy. 

Affirmations are positive statements that can help you to challenge and overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts. When you repeat them often and believe in them, you can start to make positive changes. They can help you achieve your ideal self, and unite all aspects of your self-concept.

I think, therefore I am.

Recently, after going through some emotional turmoil, I found that I almost let my self-concept shift towards negativity due to internalizing other people's actions. My self-image shifted and I had to wake up every day and combat that before it goes to heights I can't control. I made the choice to stop it from going any further.

After taking advice from professional journals and online professionals, I developed some affirmations that I would say to myself in my head or that I would write down in my journal when the voice in my head wasn't convincing enough.  

Although most therapists and life coaches will say to wake up every day and list 40 "I am" affirmations to start your day, I think starting small is okay cause this whole self-concept journey can be tough and you don't need to make it feel overwhelming. 

I also think that it's okay to say them anytime you want, not just in the morning or when you sleep. I feel like, every time you feel negativity creeping in, you should say/write down your affirmations. Even if it's just two affirmations. 

Here are some starter ideas on some affirmations that you can use until you develop your own. Every time you feel like it, or when your mind is getting the better of you, be calm and say these with the intention of making them come true:

I am Alive

I am Awake

I am Brave

I am Bold

I am Blessed

I am Capable

I am Deserving

I am Favored

I am Forgiveness

I am Grateful

I am Generous

I am Hopeful

I am Happiness

I am Important

I am Intelligent

I am Kind

I am Love

I am Open

I am A promise

I am Purposeful

I am Present

I am Positive

I am Secure

I am Sentient

I am Serene

I am Strong

I am Worthy

In conclusion...

In order to grow into better versions of ourselves, we must evaluate our self-concept and learn to actively develop it. Developing a great self-concept causes us to vibrate at a higher frequency. By being better versions of ourselves, we attract better opportunities, people, and vibes in general. 

When we are of our highest being, everything else around us aligns in the best way possible. We become more confident and we easily stand up for ourselves and what we believe in. We treat ourselves better by not being afraid to set boundaries. We become our ideal selves!

Affirmations are one of the most powerful things that can help us achieve a high self-concept. If we want to be something we aren't already, we just need to convince our minds that it's effortlessly attainable and its positivity will wash over us and change us for the better. 

I don't know about you but, if I think, therefore I am, I'd rather exist in the highest form of myself possible.