When I consider the neck, the first things that spring to mind are guillotines, beheadings, executions. Which does seem a little strange, since we live in a country where executions do not take place, there are no guillotines, and beheading is thus an entirely marginal phenomenon in the culture. Nevertheless, if I think neck, I think, chop it off.

This may simply be because the neck leads a hidden existence in the shadow of the face, that it never assumes a place of privilege in our thoughts about ourselves, and only enters the stage in these most extreme situations which, though they no longer occur in our part of the world, still proliferate in our midst, given the numerous decapitations in fiction. But I think it runs deeper than that. The neck is a vulnerable and exposed part of the body, perhaps the most vulnerable and exposed, and our experience of this is fundamental, even without a sword hanging over us. In this sense, it is related to the fear of snakes or crocodiles, which may as well appear in people living on the Finnmarksvidda plateau as in Central Africa, or for that matter, the fear of heights, which can lie dormant in people who have never seen anything other than plains and sand dunes, lowlands and swamps, fields and meadows.


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But the symbolic language that radiates from or the associations that converge on the neck, are not only about being struck, that is, being a passive victim of a surprise attack, or having something taken away from you, but also the opposite, where vulnerability is something that is offered. When we wish to show someone respect or to be polite, we bow to them, in other words, we expose our neck. It is a way of showing trust, and of giving something of yourself to the other, in an ancient system of differentiation where, in face of the supreme, you not only make a deep and sweeping bow, as to a king or other dignitaries, but kneel and lower your head to the ground, as you would before an altar or on a prayer mat. The gesture is humble, self-surrendering, it means laying your life in the hands of others.

Having said that, the opposite way of thinking, which views beheading as the cutting off of an electrical cord, that is, a way of thinking that is instrumentalist and functionalist, is not just possible, but completely dominant in our time. We desire clarity, aspire to reason, reject the darkness, the uncertainties, the steaming blood. Few places express this more clearly than a hospital. In a hospital, the body is divided into departments. One department for the ear, nose and throat, one for the eyes, one for the stomach and the intestines, one for the sexual organs, one for heart and blood vessels, and one for the soul, which is treated in the psychiatric wards. This is of course the case because medical science is instrumental, it has analyzed the functions of the different body parts and organs, and seeks to restore them when they have been weakened or damaged by disease or injury.

The first time I really understood this aspect of the body was when I read about a woman who had taken a fall while she was skiing, and had lain unconscious for a long time with her head underwater in a stream. When she was found, her body temperature was extremely low, and for all practical purposes she was dead. Her heart was restarted, but her condition remained critical, and as far as I understood, to reheat her body too quickly would have placed too great a strain on her system, so what the doctor did was to lead her blood out into the room and let it do a round in a tube there, before it was led into her again, slightly warmer, until her body temperature returned to normal. She survived, with no serious injuries.

To compare the body with clocks and automata is something people began to do in the seventeenth century, the mechanical century, the spirit of which was perhaps best captured by Descartes and Newton, and which is still present in our view of the world and ourselves, for while new knowledge may arise quickly, insight travels slowly. It takes generations before a discovery or a phenomenon out there gains enough weight to sink in and change what is in here, if it ever does.

And perhaps this is the real and simple insight afforded by the sacrifice, that we are creatures of flesh, filled with blood, and that we are going to die. What sacrifice does is to penetrate every layer, every veil of culture, and in a gesture devoid of meaning in any other sense than this, it reveals to us the otherwise always inaccessible truth about our existence, of what we are in the world.

This, you are probably thinking, says more about me than about childhood. For if childhood is supposed to be the zenith of life, what about sex? What about the desires of the flesh? What of ambition, zeal, heroics, career? What of insight, wisdom, experience, the accumulated weight of life? How about progress, conquest, riches, and splendor? Politics, science, the project of the Enlightenment? To put children and childhood before all this testifies not only to a considerable regression, but to an enormous resignation. Knowledge increases pain, the Bible says, and surely only an immature person could opt for ignorance in order to evade pain. Being able to handle complexity is part of being an adult, and as for sex, which is the central obsession of our culture, and which, when all is said and done, may well be the most powerful force in our lives, to ignore it bears witness not only to puritanism and notions of purity, and not only to the fear of the body (which in my case must be understood as a fear of women) inherent in these two concepts, but to a longing for simplification which at its core is barren, unproductive, lifeless, even dead: the child does not create anything, it simply is.

Now that I have children of my own, I look at the self-mirroring and the self-listening not as a result of narcissism or self-absorption (though it was that, too), but as part of being socialized, becoming an independent individual. To be socialized is to learn to see yourself as you appear to others. To bring up a child is really nothing other than representing or personifying this, the gaze and the voices of others, for at the outset the child possesses only a sort of undifferentiated self, permeated by feelings and needs, which can be, as it were, lit or extinguished, but not otherwise controlled. Since this is all, it is also nothing, that is to say, unknown. Something is lit, something is extinguished. All the boundaries one gradually imposes as a parent, all the prohibitions and commands, do not only have to do with teaching the child how to behave, are not just about making it function without friction in daily life, though that is perhaps often the motivation, but it is also always a gaze, it is also always a place from which the child can see itself from the outside, from a place other than the self, which only then can emerge as its own, whole self. It becomes an adult. One process is completed, and another sets in: slowly the world turns its face away.

By this time, the Alternity line has given over completely to Wizards of the Coast, with the TSR logo only seen in ads on the back few pages. Reading through this book, its layout, and its art make me think of the early d20 Modern books and the d20 Call of Cthulhu book Wizards would later do. They share some artists.

Like our previous books, this is an introduction and some fast-play rules with a sample adventure. Nice way to do it. Maybe it is because it is Baur and Cook, but this seems a little more readable to me.

Ah, now we get into some in-world background on what is going on. The Hoffmann Institute is our BPRD, our SAVE, our SPC, our Sanctuary, our in world organization to help our character push back against the night.

Unlike Star*Drive, which didn't grab me, this grabbed ahold of me pretty hard. I remember reading websites on the Internet dedicated to the Hoffmann Institute and thought it was great. Yes, I had read similar things about SAVE back in the days of Chill, that doesn't matter. The fact was this stuff was new and it was out there and I was enjoying it. This fluff, as much as anything else made me want to play this game more.

This is our hero creation chapter. The rules for hero creation are still in the Alternity Core rules, this just adds some additional skills, perks, flaws, and careers. As expected most of the high tech or advanced sci-fi stuff is out. No alien heroes, no cybertech (well...limited). But Mindwalking is now a "core" profession.

There is a timeline of the world that manages to incorporate some sort of malignant, evil force, the arrival of aliens, and the rise and fall of Atlantis. There is the expected involvement with the Egyptians, and then later the Olmecs, Mayans, Aztecs and Incas. Tesla gets name-dropped, as do the Templars and Masons. Nazis, Roswell, New World Order. It's like we all read the same books! Even the rising "Dark Tide" to the new Millennium. I would say I read it here, but it was something I was doing in Chill 2nd ed.

An aside: I wonder how this timeline tracks with the one from TSR's Masque of the Red Death. I have no expectations they are the same on purpose save that they both are drawing from the same sources of information. It might be fun (yes I said fun) to see how they line up.

A trip around the globe starting in Africa and giving the Congo, Sahara, and Egypt their due. Lots of locations in America. I was happy to see a local favorite while growing up, the Cahokia Mounds, get some good ink as well as a place more local to me now, Lower Wacker Drive in Chicago. All the expected sites are here. Groom Lake (Area 51), Rosewell, Los Alamos. Moving on to Asia, Australia and Europe. There is even coverage of Atlantis, Earth Orbit, and Mars.

Or our Monster chapter. We get all sorts of creatures here including aliens, demons, trans-dimensional travellers, Elohim, Ghosts, Men in Black, Sasquatches, and Yeti just to name a few. No vampires though. 152ee80cbc

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