NATE DEHAAN

 AGE    28 (pre-war) / 238 (fallout 4)

 BIRTHDAY    march 10, 2049

 ORIENTATION    bisexual

 APPEARANCE    at a height of 5'9", nate has a relatively average, lightly muscled physique. after several years out of the army, he has softened around the edges. he has doe-like brown eyes and a gentle countenance that tends to reveal his every emotion, despite his efforts to the contrary. many of his scars are hidden behind clothing; the most plainly visible one is a cut on the left side of his lower lower. his hair is a dark brown, of moderate length, and is often tousled or shaggy. generally, he does not have facial hair, but has hints of a five o'clock shadow.   FACECLAIM    ben feldman.

 PERSONALITY    soft spoken, timid, and occasionally on the eccentric side, nate spent much of his early adolescence known as "the weird kid." he's quiet and observant, but, once you get him talking about something he's passionate about, he's incredibly enthusiastic. he sometimes struggles to build connections with others, though he does often endear himself to folks who aren't obsessed with the concept of normalcy. his natural anxious disposition was worsened by years in combat. it's not unusual for him to be jumpy, vigilant or even easily spooked by noises, abrupt touch and other sensory experiences. even though his social skills can be lacking, he does have a very genuine interest in other people, their histories and their stories. he's an incredibly empathetic man, even if he can't always express it easily. he carries a lot of guilt and sorrow from his years of military service; he walks around like a man haunted.

  HISTORY  

the only son of roger and melanie dehaan, nate was born with an immense amount of pressure already upon his shoulders. his father, a revered general who left his military career with an honorable discharge and purple heart to back it up, saw him as his eventual successor. 

much to his chagrin, nate showed no signs of being the tough, masculine man roger propped him up to be. he showed no interest in the war games played by the other boys his age; he often wandered away from them to read, write or play in nature. (he had a particular love for dandelions, which he would bring back to his mother in bouquet-style handfuls.)

as he got older, roger's pressure didn't cease, and nate was frequently dragged to the shooting range, out to fish or to take part in various pow-wows his dad had with his old war buddies. it didn't change his gentle, sensitive nature.

nevertheless, nate knew that only one future awaited him in adulthood: enlistment. despite his best attempts, neither his parents were swayed by his interest in academics and strong grades to back it up. in another life, he might have been a teacher.

his only saving grace as a teenager was his high school sweetheart, miranda collins. while many found his shyness off-putting, she embraced it with vigor, and he fell in love with her vivacious, eager attitude. for all four years of high school, they were practically inseparable.

when they graduated, nate whisked her away from their shared graduation party to propose, and she said yes. a few months later, he was shipped off to bootcamp, and miranda headed off to college.

at first, nate struggled to adapt to the military lifestyle; his anxious nature made him obedient, but also immensely skittish. it quickly became clear that he wouldn't do for just any ordinary combat role ... but he excelled as a bomb technician. the tricky mechanics of explosives came naturally to him, and he could disarm bombs and traps just as easily as he could set them. just like his father wanted, he became lauded by the squadrons he served with, a fact that quickly made him uncomfortable.

two years after their engagement, he and miranda eloped in a small ceremony during nate's leave. 

two years later, she received her undergraduate degree and got accepted into veterinary school. nate missed her graduation.

though he rarely saw traditional combat, the pressures of war and the blood on his hands chipped away at his mental health until, after eight years of service, he broke down entirely. no longer trusting his stability in the field, he was granted a medical discharge and sent home in 2075. in tandem, miranda was just finishing veterinary school and had gotten her first job at a local vet clinic with the intention of someday owning her own practice.

kept afloat by miranda's income, nate remained unemployed for approximately a year after his discharge. despite jumping from therapist to therapist and trying every coping method under the sun, his anxiety never quite abated. he longed to return to normal, civilian life, but found it difficult and overwhelming. even a trip to the grocery store was enough to send him into a panic attack. slowly, he improved and began taking up temporary office work, but continued to be far more fragile than the eighteen-year-old man who'd been sent to war nearly a decade prior.

life threw him another curveball in early 2077, when they discovered miranda was pregnant. while she was thrilled, the idea of caring for a child filled nate with dread. he could barely care for himself - how could he possibly be a father? he recommitted himself to therapy after finding out about her pregnancy, but continued to deal with panic attacks and a new, weighing doubt on a near daily basis. even after they purchased their first home in sanctuary hills and, a few months later, welcomed their son, shaun, into the world ... he still felt disconnected. he loved miranda. he loved shaun. of course he did, but how could he be the man they needed?

he never got a chance to answer that question before the bombs dropped on october, 23 2077.