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Rest in Peace, Cheeky.
Rest in Peace, Cheeky.
I remember the day you first came home. I was 10 years old and depressed for months because our last dog had been stolen from us. Every day I would hope and pray that they would return her to us and would ask my parents if they had heard anything. I guess it eventually got to a point where they decided to secretly start visiting shelters to adopt a new dog, in the hopes of mending my broken heart. That's when my mom met you.
You were in truly awful shape, your previous owners had been abusive people who underfed you and tied you to a post with rope that dug into your neck giving you lesions. You were slated to be put down by the shelter yet by some miracle, you were there when my mom was visiting. The way she tells it, she was going to skip over you until a particular moment. It was when the shelter worker came to check on you and as she picked you up, you let out a small groan and nuzzled your head into her neck. That small act of love and appreciation was all it took for my mom to adopt you on the spot, and I will forever be grateful that she did.
You were skittish and in poor physical health, but I was determined to build a bond with you. I remember helping my mom apply your medicated ointment to treat your scabs, I remember making sure you would eat your kibble. Slowly but surely you began to trust us more and more, and within a few months you were the pinnacle of health and your true personality began to show.
You were the sweetest, kindest, most gentle and appreciative dog I have ever met in my life. That groan and nuzzle you did at the shelter quickly became a signature habit of yours that you did whenever cuddling with someone. You helped raise your two younger doggy sisters, and led by example when they were puppies. The love they had for you was so plain to see, they refused to even sleep without you by their side.
You had a voracious appetite for human food and it was a common sight to have you stare at my stepdad as he cooked dinner for the family. We only gave in and gave you scraps sometimes (maybe a bit more).
You were playful and energetic, often dragging your favorite toys with you to play wherever you were. Even as you started getting older, you loved chasing after thrown toys/tennis balls and having your younger sisters chase after you.
You had your own little quirks too, like the fact that you loved to be shaved down. Every time you got a low haircut your energy would multiply a hundred fold and you could run laps for hours and roll around and play with so much joy it was incredible to see.
I cannot put into words how much you mean to me, you have been there every day of my life since I was in elementary school. You saw me grow up, saw me at my best, worst, and everything in between. And that whole time you loved me.
You loved me despite all my imperfections and difficulties, you loved me even when I felt the most alone I have ever felt in my life. Through 16 years of my life you gave me a sense of structure and security. No matter how bad a day had been, you were always around.
I wish I was a better writer so I could properly show the world just how important you are to me and my family, but the truth of the matter is I'm devastated. You went painlessly and comfortably while being embraced after living a long life, but I wish that you never had to go at all.
Even when I was at my lowest, and essentially resigned to doing nothing but starving myself and sleeping all day, you kept me alive.
Every morning and every afternoon, no matter what, I made sure to get out of bed and feed you and the others. I had to make sure all of you were still happy and healthy, even if I was ready to die.
Not being with you in your final years will always be one of my greatest regrets, and I hope you can forgive me for that.
I hope you know that I loved you. I hope you know that I always asked to see you whenever I spoke with my mom on the phone. I hope you know that I dreamed of working hard enough to one day have a house with a big backyard for you and your sisters to run and play. I'm sorry I never got to make that come true.
There's so much I want to say but just don't know how to.
In the end all I can think is: Thank you for loving me.
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