Is it normal to invite close friend's parents to your wedding? I am not really close to the parents, but we all grew up together. I had never heard of this until my mom said something. She was surprised I wasn't planning on inviting them. Is this a normal occurance?

It depends if you can add them your list or not. My best friend got married 2 years ago, but her family and her H's family were so large, they had to cut the guest list somewhere. So, my Mom and our other friends parents weren't invited. To our wedding, they were because we could afford to have them come. It just depends on your situation.


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I only invited one set of friend's parents. However I was extremely close to them when I was in high school and they were practically my 2nd parents. I had a key to their house, and probably spent as much time at their house as I did my own.

I invited my 3 BM's parents, although only one by official invite, but the other 2 were single girls and so I was like if you want to bring them instead of a date that's good with me (I know them all pretty well). Only one set actually came. Another friend's mom (who I've known for 20 years) wanted to come and so I invited her too and she came and had SO much fun with my BM's parents lol -- funny how that works out! If you have the room it's a nice gesture, but if not....

We invited the parents of 2 of our bridal party (my MOH and one of DH's GM) and also a few other parents of good friends of mine. But this is because I spent a lot of time at their homes during high school and university.

I was quite worried about this as I dumped ex for DH but his whole family was and are the sweetest people and accepted my DH as just another of my friends and treated me like they hadn't seen me since last weekend instead of 3 yrs before.

I cannot locate the origins of my indifference toward marriage. If anything, the joys of my early childhood perhaps should have been a source of encouragement toward me marrying in the future. My parents made sure I knew what it meant to be loved and cherished, and I relished in the stability of our home and family life. My mother and father even appeared happy to be together and, for years, nothing seemed out of place.

Then, in 2008, everything took a drastic turn. The recession severely impacted the financial security of my family. My father, who was a small business owner and the sole provider for our family of six, could not keep up with rising costs and decreased earnings. The stress and anticipatory anxiety he suffered as a result of not being able to provide the same standard of living we had been accustomed to weighed heavily on him. In the midst of this turmoil, he embraced a controlling and aggressive conduct aimed almost exclusively at my mother.

Soon after, my father began engaging in abuse. On more than one occasion, I witnessed him put his hands on my mother and hurl insults at her. The very first time I saw him hit her, in early 2009, left a lasting impression on me. The passive indifference toward marriage I had quickly morphed into aversion.

I have recollections from that period of telling my mother I never want to get married. When she would ask why, I expressed it was because I did not want to end up with a man like my father. She would assure me that marriage is something beautiful, that not all men are like my father, and that even her marriage was one she had enjoyed in years past.

What I did not tell them, and what only remained a shapeless thought in my head, was that I did not want to end up like my mother. I did not want to be in a marriage with someone who surely could overpower me. I did not want to end up with someone who would come to know about my family history, and who might think to use it to their advantage by manipulating me. What I did not tell them was simply that I was afraid. Perhaps I did not tell them this because I had a difficult time even recognizing it for myself.

What had finally changed my mind about marriage was not anything profound. The shift was rooted simply in confronting precisely the very things which I had ignored or left unaddressed all those years ago: my trauma, and my purest desires, both of which had been tangled together at the root. For far too long, I had been convinced that my desire to remain unmarried was truly genuine, untouched by any of the trauma I had experienced.

I sought advice from many people in my community, hoping a word from their mouths would alleviate my anxieties and help me to move forward with getting married to my husband. Many of these individuals shared a profound mutual love and friendship with my mother during her life. They were women who knew me in ways that I did not know myself, and who were overjoyed as they finally witnessed my heart expand toward marriage. And with the most astonishing love and patience, they hearkened to my anxieties and hesitation without judgment. They meditated on all that was weighing me down, and did their best to instill in me an awareness of my own fears and self-sabotage, so that even when I did continue to harbor fears and apprehensions, I was able to identify the source of these and continue moving forward in spite of those feelings.

Ever since getting married, I constantly circle back to those periods of my life, reflecting even more on those conversations my mother and I shared together. I recall the moments she would do her best to make me understand that marriage is a spectacular and unparalleled blessing. I think about how much she adored the notion of being a grandmother to my child, and of me being in love.

Nour Naas is a Libyan writer from Vallejo, California. Her work has previously appeared or is forthcoming in Catapult, The Establishment, Huffington Post, and SBS Australia, among others. She is currently at work on a memoir exploring her grief in the aftermath of her mother's death and the Libyan revolution.You can find her work here: nourmnaas.com

Coming out of a once-in-a-generation global pandemic, Americans appear more attuned than ever to the importance of friendship. However, despite renewed interest in the topic of friendship in popular culture and the news media, signs suggest that the role of friends in American social life is experiencing a pronounced decline. The May 2021 American Perspectives Survey finds that Americans report having fewer close friendships than they once did, talking to their friends less often, and relying less on their friends for personal support.

The financial devastation wrought by the COVID-19 pandemic has been well-documented, but less widely reported is the emotional toll many Americans faced as a result of quarantine requirements and self-imposed social isolation. Nearly half (47 percent) of Americans report having lost touch with at least a few friends over the past 12 months. Nearly one in 10 (9 percent) Americans report having lost touch with most of their friends.

Young women appear to have been more affected than most were. Nearly six in 10 (59 percent) report having lost touch with at least a few friends, and 16 percent say they are no longer in regular contact with most of their friends.

Despite prolonged periods of social isolation and quarantine that characterized much of American life over the past year, nearly half (46 percent) of Americans report having made a new friend within the past 12 months. Nearly one-third (30 percent) of the public say they have made a new friend in the past one to four years. Notably, 22 percent of Americans say it has been at least five years since they last made a new friend.

Overall, more than half (53 percent) of Americans say that the first person they talk to when they have a personal problem is their spouse or partner. Sixteen percent of the public say they go to a friend first when confronting a personal issue, and 10 percent say they rely on their parents. Roughly the same amount (9 percent) say they turn to a sibling or other family member. Five percent of Americans say they first reach out to their children when dealing with a personal issue.

Fewer Americans appear to be relying on friends for personal support than they have in the past. A survey conducted by Gallup in 1990 found that more than one-quarter (26 percent) of Americans said their friend was the first person they would turn to when they had a personal problem.[4]

With the average age of first marriages rising steadily and fewer Americans turning to friends for support, parents have stepped in to fill the gap. Young men are now more likely to rely on their parents for personal support than other people in their life. Thirty-six percent of young men say their parents are the first people they reach out to when facing a personal problem. Roughly one in four (24 percent) young women say their parents are their first call.

The number of young men relying on their parents for personal support has more than doubled over the past several decades. In 1990, only 17 percent of young men and an identical number of young women reported that their parents were the first people they talked to when confronting a personal problem. Close to half (45 percent) of young men said they turned to their friends first.

One reason young men are more likely to seek out their parents for support may have to do with their living situation. More than half (52 percent) of young men are currently living with their parents, compared to 44 percent of young women. Young adults who live with their parents are twice as likely to rely on their parents for support than those with other living arrangements.

There is an even larger gender gap between unmarried men and women. Nearly four in 10 (39 percent) single unmarried women say they usually talk to a friend when facing a personal problem, compared to 30 percent of unmarried men[5]. Again, unmarried men are significantly more likely than women are to say they rely on their parents for help when dealing with a personal issue (39 percent vs. 26 percent).

Gender differences are also apparent among married Americans. Married men are significantly more likely than married women are to say the first person they talk to when they have a problem is their spouse. Eighty-five percent of married men, compared to 72 percent of married women, say they turn to their spouse when they have a personal problem. 152ee80cbc

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