September 12, 2026
Since accepting my call to YAGM, I have really struggled to call myself a missionary.
The word missionary carries a lot of valid, heavy connotations. In fact, I have hesitated to give myself the job title “Missionary” at all, opting instead for volunteer or nonprofit worker. While both of those things are true, they still lack the faith element that is very much a part of this program.
So what does it actually mean to be a missionary?
Historically, a goal of mission work was often to bring people, particularly people from countries with majority non-Christian faiths, to Christ. This was not always a mutually beneficial relationship, but rather one party telling another that their way of life, traditions, or beliefs were somehow “wrong.”
As a person who has a communications degree, and has studied topics such as interpersonal communication, peace and conflict studies, ecofeminism, and power dynamics, the thought of being a traditional missionary strikes me wrong in so many ways.
Telling someone that their way of living and traditions are somehow “wrong” not only starts a relationship off on the wrong foot, but also does not create an environment for open conversation and productive community building. No one likes being told that they are wrong, especially by someone different from them. And when that person holds more social, economic, or institutional power, those conversations become even more complicated.
This is one of the reasons I have always been interested in global service, but until finding YAGM, I had not heard of the model of accompaniment.
Much of our orientation in Chicago was focused on breaking down the method of accompaniment, which is the way that ELCA missionaries interact with the communities they are serving.
We discussed local and global topics such as race, gender, sexuality, poverty, and the power structures that have allowed these social injustices to continue. We learned how to critically think about who holds power and why they hold it. We talked about listening deeply and practiced how to simply be with someone without immediately trying to question, fix, or propel them along.
One of the biggest ideas we were challenged to consider was that we are not necessarily going into our communities to change them. Instead, we are being asked to remain open to being changed ourselves.
That idea feels much more in line with the ways that I view my own approach to faith and sharing my faith with others.
If you'd like to learn more about the theological and scholarly foundations of accompaniment, I have included some resources below.
I approach faith in a “they will know we are Christians by our love” kind of way.
I hope that my joy and my love for others will shine through in a way that makes people think, I want what she’s having.
This may not be the most direct approach to faith, but it has allowed me to speak about God with people who may not have otherwise opened up to me about their beliefs. I have found that some of the most meaningful conversations about faith happen naturally, in the middle of conversations about life, relationships, hopes, fears, and everything in between.
And yet, I find myself feeling guilty about not being “enough” of a Christian. By not living out my faith “boldly” and loudly enough.
I sometimes wonder if I should be doing more. Saying more. Sharing my faith more directly.
But what if those quiet moments of peace, those special times of deep conversation, and those rare moments of deep love are really what sharing faith is all about?
What if faith does not always have to be something that we convince someone else to believe?
What if sometimes it is simply something we live?
I still don't know.
I came into YAGM with a lot of questions about what it means to be a missionary. Those questions became even more complicated during orientation, as we were given the space to wrestle with them together.
But I also left orientation with a different understanding of what this year could look like.
I’ve learned that being a missionary can mean leaving with more questions than answers. I’ve learned that it is about learning to listen deeply, to be present, and to enter into relationships with enough humility to recognize that I have just as much to learn as I have to offer.
I still don't know if I like calling myself a missionary.
Maybe by the end of this year, I will. And maybe I won't.
But for now, I am learning to be comfortable with the discomfort of not knowing what exactly I am doing here, and to trust that I am here because I have a lot to learn.