The first stage in this gradual process of healing is called shiva. The period of shiva is intended to see mourners through the first days of intense grief and disorientation; Jewish tradition recognizes that grief continues long after shiva and offers additional rituals to support mourners beyond this initial period of grief.
It is customary to observe shiva in the home of the deceased. If this is not possible, shiva may be marked in the home of an immediate family member or even a friend. Most important, the family should be together during this time.
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Before burial, grief is so strong as virtually to preclude consolation by even the most well-meaning friend. Additionally, immediate family is often consumed with the practical arrangements of the burial and funeral. Accordingly, the appropriate time for a condolence call begins after interment during the shiva week.
It is traditional not to knock or ring the doorbell, but rather just to enter a house of mourning, so as not to bother the mourners. Many do not observe this custom today, but it is a good idea to try the door before ringing the bell when paying a shiva call.
Yes. It is considered an act of great caring to free the family from everyday concerns during shiva. The beginning of shiva also offers friends an opportunity to express their sympathy through visits to the home. At the same time, those in mourning initiate a process that will ultimately lead them back to the world. This process involves many customs with a twin rationale: acceptance of death and a determination to return to life.
It is customary for a daily service, known as a shiva minyan, to be held usually in the late afternoon or early evening. This brief service allows the mourners to recite the Kaddish, the prayer recited in memory of the deceased. This can also be a time for publicly sharing memories of the deceased. Sometimes, the mourners gather together for a meal following the brief service.
1. The images in this page are downloaded from elsewhere. The depiction of the God is not perfect in most of these pictures (for example color shown as blue for Lord shiva. Please refer to the Thoughts article What is the color in which Lord shiva to be depicted). 0852c4b9a8
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