First aid kit

You told me once I have a rebel heart
I don't know if that's true
But I believe you saw something in me that lives inside you too
Now all I hear is the wind
There's a storm coming through
Did I misplace or forsake my love
Now that I gave it to you?

I don't know what it is that makes me run
That makes me wanna shatter everything that I've done
Why do I keep dreaming of you?
Why do I keep dreaming of you?
Is it all because of my rebel heart?

Tell me why do I keep trying
To be someone I'll never be
I keep seeing her in everyone
Everyone but me
But I know you truly saw me
Even if just for a while
Maybe that's why it hurts now
To leave it all behind

I don't know what it is that makes me run
That makes me wanna shatter everything that I've done
Why do I keep dreaming of you?
Why do I keep dreaming of you?
Is it all because of my rebel heart?
Is it all because of my rebel heart?
Is it all because of my rebel heart?
Is it all because of my rebel heart?

Nothing matters, all is futile
And it's fading fast
I fell so hard, so blindly
Had to come back and find me
I wanted you so much, so freely
Now I have to take it back
Nothing matters, all is futile
And it's in the past

Lately I've been thinking about the past
How there is no holding back
No point in wasting sorrow
On things that won't be here tomorrow

But you and I well we don't need to speak
It's the secret that we keep
Out of view and out of sight
Just say when and we'll say goodnight
Tell me it's okay
To live life this way
Sometimes I want you to stay
I know it's a shame

Now I have spent so much of my time
Going out of my mind
Trying so hard to be of use
But what you cannot gain you lose

In LA, the sun's almost too bright
I cannot get it right
The emptiness I feel
And now none of it seems real

So maybe it's alright
If I just spend the night
Sometimes I just can't bear to walk away
I know it's a shame

Who have I become
Who will I be
Come tomorrow

Tell me it's okay
If I ask you to stay
Sometimes the night cuts through me like a knife
I know it's a shame

I could’ve sworn I saw fireworks
From your house last night
As the lights flickered and they failed
I had it all figured out

Why do I do this to myself?
Everytime
I know the way it ends
Before it's even begun
I am the only one
At the finish line

I took a trip out to the frozen lake
And it felt so far away
But I could feel it washing over me
There’s no escaping, the harsh light of day

Why do I do this to myself?
Everytime
I know the way it ends
Before it's even begun
I am the only one
At the finish line

Stood out on that beach in Chicago
Woke up next to you on Silver Lake Avenue
Wherever I went
I always knew, always knew
Until I didn’t know

Why do I do this to myself?
Everytime
I know the way it ends
Before it's even begun
I am the only one
At the finish line

I could’ve sworn I saw fireworks
From your house last night

Honey, now that your shackles are gone
And you're out there on your own
Won't you let me know
If things get hard
Honey, now your shackle's been lifted
You're a sweet young thing and you're oh so gifted
Will you let me know
If things turn bad

I wasn't looking for trouble but trouble came
I wasn't looking to change, I'll never be the same
But life's not what you make it, baby

Send me a postcard
When you get to where you're going
Send me a line
To everything you've left behind

Honey, now that I've found my way
And I miss you more than I can say
Won't you promise to
Say a prayer for me
Honey, now that the morning's come
We're both still out on the run
Won't you let me know
If you feel free

We were looking to mend it but we tore it apart
And I went and broke my own goddamned heart
See, life's not what you make it, baby

Send me a postcard
When you get to where you're going
Send me a line
To everything you've left behind

Pick it for me, James

I was just a kid when I fell for you
I'm not much older now but even then I knew
That the road was steep and full of strife

I never knew what to say, could never get it right
And I'm alone again at the end of night
For life's not what you make it, baby

Send me a postcard
When you get to where you're going
Send me a line
To everything you've left behind

I wrote you a letter
To make myself feel better
To redeem some part of me
I thought I had lost

And we were a lost cause
Long before we fell apart
'Cause honey, I was too eager
And you were too smart

And I look for you
In these empty rooms
You're a phone call away
I'm on the interstate

And I've been drinking cheap wine
Just to pass the time
I'm falling behind
And it doesn't matter who you are to me

Well, I'm just like my mother
We both love to run
Chase impossible things
Or unreachable dreams

Lie awake in the night
Thinking this can't be right
But there is no other way
To live a life alone
I'm alone now

Then suddenly we wake from this dream
That we have made
It hits you all at once and then it slowly fades
I'm raising in to nothing now
It all falls away
I know it now for my own sake that I cannot stay

What comes after this
A momentary bliss
Oh, I need you more than ever now
And here we are somehow
The world shines gold in you
See it all in you
Oh, I need you more than ever now
And light breaks through somehow

Will I know what this all means?
When we're a hazy memory
With all the colors of a dream
My wild sweet love
My wild sweet love

Outside invited in
Now I'm lost again
Oh I need you more than ever now
I'll make it through somehow

Will I know what this all means?
When we're a hazy memory
With all the colors of a dream
My wild sweet love
My wild sweet love

I can't blame you for taking that path
No matter how I wish you'd come back to me
Now to reclaim the past
Just do what you gotta do

Will I know what this all means?
When we're a hazy memory
With all the colors of a dream
My wild sweet love
My wild sweet love
My wild sweet love
My wild sweet love

Well, a goodbye never seems finished
Just like these songs that I write
They hang all off like stars in the night
There's nothing left but the illusion of light
And you, you could have been mine

Your mother, she's an actress
And we're all putting on a play
There's some conviction, pretend it's all real
Try to ignore how sad it all feels
Yes, try not to break her heart if you can

Hold on to whatever you can
Until it's gone
Carry on
For none of us will be here for too long

I'll try not to let the world
And its darkness bring me down
Think of the love and the beauty I found
The simple things that I've left behind
Oh, the way he'd make me laugh

But I'll hold on to whatever I can
Until it's gone
I'll carry on
For none of us will be here for too long gone

You're a distant star
My darling, you're so far away
You were never meant to stay
I reached out to see
If you're still here with me
Maybe we could have made it easy
Could we?

Now I will never know you
You were just someone passing by
And it makes me sad to think about
All the stories and things I'll be without
But I think I'm getting used to the silence now

Today, I climb the highest mountain I have ever climbed
And I turn, to look at ruins I had left behind
And you, where were you so far removed from any truth
I lost you
Didn't I?
First I think I lost myself

Children
Then and forever locked in a memory
Olden
That mirror searching for some kind of certainty
That you were just the same as everyone
But you were wrong
And it hurt you
Didn't it?
All you couldn't be

Ruins
Ohhh
Ruins
Ohhh

I tried to hold on to some kind of dignity
Too long I waded through a vast and endless sea
Thinking, I could find the secret there within
But I gave up
Did not seem the only way

Ruins
All the things we built assured that they would last
Ending months ticket stubs, and written notes and photographs
Where are you and here somewhere I cannot go
I'm sorry
I am
But I don't take it back
And in the night I hear your voice
Sometimes but it quickly passes
In dreams I saw what I had thought
Could be some kind of answer
You try and try and try until you cannot try no more
Captured in our own

Ruins
Ohhh
Ruins
Ohhh
Ruins

So here we go again
I know how this one ends
It's a phone call from someplace far away
You say you found yourself
Oh, in someone else
And she makes you forget about the rain

Her eyes are a golden hue
And everything you knew
Slips away at the hem of her dress
As I was passing by
That old mountain side
It turned to dust at my feet

So I am incomplete
So loud and so discreet
You tried to pinpoint me, I guess that was your mistake
Too much whiskey
Too much honey, too much wine
I learned some things never heal with time

I've been waiting here
Feels like a million years
And I'm a photograph that you forgot you took
But I remember spring
I remember everything
Oh, I guess that's the way it goes

(Here we go!)

Lalalalalala lalalalalala
Lalala la lalalala lalala

Each and every breath we take
A step towards death and the Moon is pale
And we might have seen something
But we ain't seen nothing yet

And I may have dreamt it
Or it may have happened
When I stood right here
Waiting for a sign
For me to walk away

But I give in so easy
And I give up instantly
I chase what is gone
And my friends are getting tired
Of the shit that I pull

They say: Why do you love those
Who turn you into a fool
Why do you let them get to you
You should have been running
When you chose to stay

Now I feel so far away
From the person I once was
I thought love was enough
You can tell yourself so many things
And nothing has to be true

Did you wake up last night
Drenched in your own sweat and tears
No it's not always easy
You get lost counting the years
Since you last felt like you were home
Since you last felt like you were home
Since you last felt like you were home
Oh I thought you were home