Brooke left me a voice memo the other week about a TikTok trend she attempted: cooking a breakfast sandwich the night before to consume the following morning, a little time saving hack to optimize the flow of the workday. Reader, as you might imagine, the breakfast sandwich was not on the right side of edible 10 hours hence. She explained this internet-induced debacle with her characteristic hilarity and self-deprecation. Arguably, most TikTok trends are not recommended for mere mortals over the age of 23. I once ran out and bought that mascara the girls were crazy about only to look like a chimney sweep moments after application. Some things are best left to the young and their mysterious editing tools.

The Vaster Wilds by Lauren Groff. I love LG and this new one SLAPS. She is famous for refusing to answer questions around her prolific output in light of being a mother, but this profile spilled the beans.

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I laughed of course, imagining that rubbery-ass breakfast sandwich. But the thing I underscored to Brooke in my voice memo back is that while perhaps the fruits of her labor were, er, disgusting, the thing to commend is the effort itself. Why the hell not try something, anything, especially in this opaque wintery tundra? Why not try to do a favor to one\u2019s future self in the evening in lieu of farting into a snuggy, business as usual? So you shoot your shot and it doesn\u2019t exactly swish. It\u2019s the effort we must applaud.

I know this is true, and I see it so clearly in celebrating my friend\u2019s sandwich effort. Yet I am really bad at taking my own advice. We all are, especially in this economy, the one that wants results, and fast. We are confronted with those results most plainly on s****l m***a, the place we go to brag about whatever, even breakfast sandwiches. But effort is everywhere, so gorgeous and earnest. I see this at the gym, especially this time of year. The classes I frequent (and make little progress in) are maxed out in capacity, everyone hurling their bodies through space, making efforts. The class size typically subsides to pre-resolution levels around March. We are all there because we want results, sure, but I also like the ritual: the structure that 45 minutes imposes on my day; seeing gym friends and gym enemies; titrating the weight of the weights; wiping down the mats.

I\u2019m deep into drafting a book\u2014on intuition, AMA\u2014and I\u2019m trying to be honest in my efforts. I\u2019ve been on this merry-go-round a few times now (by the grace of goddess), and I know that the effort is all there really is. The outcome is totally out of your control, no matter how much wishing and hoping and thinking and praying and sending hair-on-fire emails. But did I mention I\u2019m really bad at taking my own advice? The thing about effort is that it\u2019s not pretty and it requires oh so much effort to look effortless. It is a system that is neither elegant nor efficient. I recently turned in 120+ pages to my editor and I\u2019ll be pleased if 1/3 survive in some iteration. People often compare writing a book to giving birth. I don\u2019t think the analogy works for a bunch of reasons but mostly the fact that you can stop writing a book at any time and no one cares. Not so much when you are in labor. But one similarity remains: is this\u2014writing oodles of pages for them to inevitably meet the woodchipper/pushing a very large thing through a very small hole\u2014the best we\u2019ve come up with? Unfortunately.

Indulge me with a troubling thought I\u2019ve been having lately: I think about the facts of our world--climate change, the rise of fascism\u2014and what my kids might say to me when they are older. You knew this was coming. What did you do? I don\u2019t think they\u2019ll be super keen to hear the honest answer which is, I watched prestige television and read apocalyptic novels that satirized the coming doom. Sometimes someone would post a worthcause on Instagram and I\u2019d donate to it or repost it. I held up signs. I tried to make peace with tending my proverbial garden, making change in my own community because really the broader world was too scary. I felt powerless and very very afraid, so much so that I ostriched. I skimmed the headlines and they made me queasy. I listened to a lot of Bravo recap podcasts. I don\u2019t know if I can change the tide of history, but I want my answer to be better than what it would be today. The effort itself can be a frustrating answer. But unlike an outcome, which is theoretical and fleeting, the effort is solid and right now. The outcome can let you down. The effort, though, is a good friend.

Mike Birbiglia comedy specials: Never let it be said that Liz Greenwood did not find succor in the ramblings of a white middle-aged man. I\u2019m finding his cadences so relaxing lately?! And any reference to a St. John\u2019s cattle call dance is *chef\u2019s kiss*. Reader, I was the cattle.

Ask Ronna podcast particularly this episode with American hero June Diane Raphael, which features a question that had me rolling on the floor of a very crowded bus. Ronna\u2019s Mass accent is like ASMR.

Lovecore, which shares the visuals and ethos of Valentine's Day, is based on the visual culture of manufactured romance. The forms of love that the aesthetic specifically focuses on are affectionate, dopamine-filled, and "gushy." It can involve both requited and unrequited relationships, with both crushing on someone from afar and the rituals of dating being shown in these images. Relationships could be both new and juvenile or old and familiar. The more mature and philosophical or seductive and erotic aspects of love are not featured, as visually, these often do not match the visuals and younger audience of Lovecore.

However, people who enjoy the aesthetic are not necessarily actively crushing on anyone or in a relationship depicted in the aesthetic. The aesthetic largely speaks about crushes and relationships in the theoretical, with there not being a true person that the original poster is thinking about. People who enjoy romance fiction, queer people who celebrate love, and people who wish for romantic experiences are some examples of people who appreciate the aesthetic.

Visually, Lovecore tends to focus on the commercialization of love through Valentine's Day decorative trends. The rituals associated with romance are also heavily featured, especially in text. The aesthetic has substyles that can emphasize vintage, anime or Cottagecore visuals.

Popular motifs include hearts, boxes of chocolate, lipstick, love letters, cupid, angels, and the colours red and pink. There are also at times vintage elements present in the form of scans of Valentine's Day cards written in the 1950s and 60s. There is sometimes overlap with anime in the form of pink manga edits and images of anime characters with hearts in their eyes.

Lovecore fashion is a mix of lingerie, angel wings, satin dresses, and just general formal date wear, though sometimes people who identify with the aesthetic adopt a softie look or opt for graphic t-shirts with the aforementioned themes. Larme-styled outfits are also popular. Colors like pink, red, and white, as well as motifs such as hearts and lipstick marks, are also fairly common. Some garments include:

Pagano-Lovecore focuses on the iconography of love in Greco-Roman mythology and the Italian Renaissance, rather than the popular culture and commercialized love. Fixated on Greco-Roman gods and goddesses, beautiful statues, doves, old jewelry, ancient love poetry, and other antique things in Rome or ancient Greece. Figures include Aphrodite, Eros, Adonis, and other love deities. Easy overlap with Dark Academia. More deities and visuals can be found at Hellenic. 152ee80cbc

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