Courtship behaviors are very similar in all cultures that allow people to choose their own love partners. Unfortunately, myths about courtship behaviors have evolved over the millennia and become a permanent part of our human psyche. Modern researchers have exposed the fallacy of some of these love myths. One such felonious courtship myth will be examined.
Contrary to popular belief, women actually initiate courtship rituals. This supposition holds true across all cultures that allow free selection of partners. Women initiate the courtship ritual by smiling at their person of interest. In quick succession, women display an eyebrow flash and tilt their heads slightly downward and away. Some women will add a lower lip tug to the courtship sequence. If women lift their heads and reengage eye contact with their person of interest, they send the nonverbal message that it is okay for the person of interest to approach them. Men may think they are initiating the relationship, but it is really the woman who regulates the first contact.
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The keys to the courtship sequence are the smile, eyebrow flash, and head tilt. When people smile, they release endorphins. Endorphins make people feel good about themselves. The Golden Rule of Friendship states that when we make people feel good about themselves, they will like us. Smiling achieves that end. The eyebrow flash is a quick up-and-down movement of the eyebrows that lasts about 1/64th of a second. An eyebrow flash is a friendship signal that lets the other person know we do not pose a threat. The head tilt exposes the carotid artery. The carotid artery is a vulnerable part of our body. By exposing it, we signal to the other person that we trust they will not harm us.
John R. "Jack" Schafer, Ph.D., is a behavioral analyst for the FBI, and is the author of The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over. 152ee80cbc