- The Los Angeles International Film Festival Screenplay Competition (quarter finalist)
- Screencraft Horror Screenplay Competition (quarter finalist)
- Paige Screenplay Competition Notes (5-30-18 draft)
"This was a chilling script. The characters were likable and engaging, the horror scenarios were gory and over the top....You did a solid job keeping the tension high and me on the edge of my seat. I was anxiously waiting to find out how the hero was going to win the day or, at least, find a way to escape and return to his normal life... Your protagonist, Vincent, was a solid lead character... It’s so hard to write young people without making them clichés, but Lisa was realistic and totally believable... Your antagonist, Shazz, was a despicable human being and a formidable opponent. ... To reiterate, I enjoyed reading your script. The characters were intriguing and believable, the premise/concept was classic horror at its finest, and the plot/story was spooky and unsettling."
Professional Coverage Service Notes
5-15-18 Screenplay Coverage - BP
This is a script that reads like a genuine horror movie and one that I can definitely see getting made. There are a couple of real surprises along the way but most of all, the piece has heart. I cared about the characters throughout and felt like their journeys over the course of this story really mattered. The concept here is strong, combining a curse with an attractive wish fulfillment angle. The cast is well-rounded and the story does a really good job capitalizing on the characters’ personalities to generate some of the best and most haunting scares. The characters are great. They’re really powerful throughout the script. The concept is simple and strong and the characters are complete and deep enough to be appealing to legitimate performers who can really help push a piece like this over the top. The pacing is really solid. The script never stops moving. There’s a real maturity to this piece, the relationships are complex and difficult. All the relationships feel really human. There are good scares here as well and some of the gruesome elements are memorable and disconcerting. Overall, this is a very sad and human story that merges well with the horror elements to create a particularly mature and bleak horror experience. This script has a really solid chance.
5-16-18 Screenplay Readers - AB
This script combines horror with a heartfelt father-daughter relationship, engaging the reader throughout. The concept is engaging, as it touches on universal themes such as the lengths one will go to in order to achieve success. Vincent's struggles as an artist and a parent are very relatable, meaning that the reader is invested in him throughout his journey. Colorful characters populate this world, and each is distinct. Vivid descriptions make the world come to life. The script is well structured, hitting all of the right plot points at the traditional times. The climax is excellent. All of the pieces come together. The ending was perfect… This script has a unique hook and intriguing characters with relatable struggles. The script is certainly scary, as horror films should be, but it is also grounded in the personal and the human.
5 - 30 Screenplay Readers - JF
With its eerie premise, ghastly deaths, and psychological terror, "Lead" has the potential to make even the most devoted enthusiast give up pencils forever. A twist on the "possessed artifact" horror genre, the film takes one of the most innocuous objects in existence and turns it into a deadly and horrifying thing. Vincent's desperation to save his relationship with Lisa keeps the film grounded; there's always something real at stake despite the many supernatural happenings.
5-18 Screencraft - A24A2
Allow me to start off by saying congrats on an extremely unique and entertaining script. The fact that you took on the horror genre and were still able to add some serious character development throughout the story, proved your talent as a writer. Generally speaking, the script was nicely paced as the action continually seemed to push the story in different directions. From the initial inciting incident of ****, to the influential turning points of the abyss, Vincent's shift to evil, to *****, the plot never stopped moving forward. The script is incredibly tight at the moment. It's insanely captivating and a pleasure to read.
5-9-18 Script Reader Pro - Scott
What you have here is a dark thriller with a great concept about this artist who finds himself cursed with this graphite that holds a dark supernatural power. ..This is a very cool concept. The idea that this cursed piece of graphite allows an artist to steer themselves down into a dark murderous path, which traces all the way back to Vincent van Gogh cutting off his ear, is original and fresh. You give us a lead character who is layered and interesting and passionate… I think Vincent’s character arc and the way he falls to pieces works very well. The way he loses his mind little by little, and does horrible acts, even though he knows they are bad and he isn't willingly doing it speaks volumes about how he handles this affliction of sorts. I don't think you really need to tweak or change anything to do with the way that unfolds… I felt you did an excellent job of building and capitalizing on the momentum in your story. Once Vincent's demeanor and actions grew darker and darker, he was so unpredictable, and I never knew when he was going to make a misstep that was going to be something he couldn't return from… The action moved quickly and smoothly, and it was a very visual finale… Overall, I really enjoyed the concept of this movie, and the plight of an eccentric artist who loses his muse and his creativity and cashes in on the too-good-to-be-true chance at redemption. There's a strong theme there, and the built-in audience for this type of film would really get a kick out of what they were watching.