"Charge!!!"

After the two-hour bombing by the magical forces, it was finally time for Garback Squad to charge. We haven't been given orders to attack the enemy. We just have to jump out of the trench at the signal, run across the plain where enemy bullets are flying, and sprint to the next trench.

"Don't leave my side, Touli! Salsa, protect Touli even if it costs you your life!"
"Understood."
"Yes, sir!"

It seems that the squad leader doesn't have high expectations for Salsa or me as combatants. I'm just a simple healer, and Salsa is apparently seen as nothing more than a meat shield for me. Salsa seems to be aware of this, but...

"I'll recite the command! I will protect Second-Class Medic Touli with my life!"
"Good spirit! Now follow through with your words!"

Somehow, Salsa seems to be really fired up. Even though he's being treated as a disposable pawn, why is he so enthusiastic? Well, as long as he's motivated to protect me, that's all that matters. Also, the way the squad leader spoke just now implies that Salsa's life is worth less than mine. I feel a little relieved.

The assault operation on that day seemed to have been successful. Unlike three days ago, there were charred bodies of the enemy scattered all over, and the smell of burnt flesh and iron hit the nose.

"Hahaha, it seems that the enemy didn't expect us to attack so soon. Let's give the surviving pests their death sentence!" Captain Garback laughed as he charged into the enemy camp.

Gunfire echoed from all sides, and in the battlefield where explosions and blood splatters flew, he seemed to be having fun like a fish in water.

"Hey, hurry up!"
"Hurry, Salsa, so that we don't get left behind by the captain!"

Captain Garback kept rushing forward ahead of everyone else. Even though we were running with all our might, he kept getting further away.

"Take that, you rust on my sword!"

As I followed, I screamed internally, "Please stop this reckless charge!"

With no support from their surroundings, the captain charging alone towards the rain of bullets seemed like a suicidal man. But oddly enough, the safest place on this battlefield was right behind the captain, who was cutting through the bullets with his sword, as he was a skilled swordsman in this fantasy world of swords and magic.

"Why can't the bullets hit him?"
"He's cutting them with his sword." 

Oh, right. I forgot. Because I was so immersed in this dirty war, I had forgotten that this was a fantasy world of swords and magic. Captain Garback was a skilled swordsman who could cut down bullets.

"Why is the Captain, who is cutting bullets while running, faster than us?"
"I have no idea!" 

The captain's combat skills were incredible, as he charged towards the trenches where the enemy was hiding, splattering blood and crushing them. The rest of the squad, including Salsa, could only follow him like goldfish poop. But since Captain Garback occasionally stopped to cut off the enemy's heads, we managed to keep up with him.

"If you don't want to die, don't fall behind me, you rookies!"
"U-understood!"

I never thought I would witness the spectacle of a living human being cutting bullets with a sword in real life. Until now, I thought Garback was rude and arrogant, and the worst as a superior officer...

However, even Chief Gael, who dislikes that squad leader, admits that he is an excellent assault soldier. After all, Garback is an 'Ace'.

"Squad leader! You're advancing too far, we can't coordinate with other units anymore!"
"Huh? Again? You're so sloppy."

However, as Chief Gael had repeatedly said, his bad habit was that he enjoyed assaulting so much that he would charge ahead without observing the surroundings if left alone. We had certainly advanced too far. Our friendly forces are still fighting at a point dozens of meters ahead.

"Haa! Haa! Squad leader, sir! I propose prioritizing securing the terrain rather than further advancing."
"Tsk, useless. You guys are exhausted too, it's about time to retreat."

Undoubtedly, our squad was becoming isolated. Realizing this, the squad leader looked like he had been put off, but he let out a sigh and stopped the advance.

"Alright, gather up. Our squad will support the advance of friendly forces from this trench."
""Understood.""

Almost at the same time as the order to gather, squad members appeared around us. Unlike us, who were sweating profusely, the seniors still seemed to have some composure. They had been able to catch up with the squad leader while fighting properly. Perhaps, they were true seasoned soldiers.

"Squad leader, if I may report..."
"What is it? Speak up."
"Gray First-Class Infantry in my unit has suffered a thigh injury from a bullet. If the bleeding continues, there is a risk of death. We request medical assistance from the medic."

At the words, I noticed a young male soldier being carried on the shoulder, grimacing in pain.

The squad leader, with a slightly contemplative expression, turns towards me and says, "Hmmm. Touli, you can use healing magic up to twice, right?"
"Yes."
"Alright then, you're authorized to provide emergency treatment to Gray and use healing magic once if necessary."
"Understood. Gray, First-Class Infantry, please show me your injury."

Finally, I've been given a typical medic's job. It's tough standing here in exhaustion, but this kind of frontline treatment is also the reason for my existence. I'll muster my spirits and do my best.

"Alright, we'll secure the surroundings. We'll protect Touli and Gray as we support the advance of other squads."
"Y-Yes, sir!"

By the way, it seems that Captain Garback actually allows his subordinates to use healing magic. He had said before that he would only let himself use it. Well, maybe it's because the battle is already over today. Either out of fear of Captain Garback or for some other reason, most of the enemy soldiers around us have already retreated.

"There's a blood clot in the gunshot wound in your thigh. I'll need to remove it, so it might hurt a bit."
"...Ugh! Thanks, Touli-chan. Let's go on a date sometime."
"I've confirmed that the blood clot has been removed. I will now use healing magic. [Heal]"
"I wish there was some kind of reaction."

This is the first time we've spoken face-to-face, but Gray, the First-Class Infantry, seems like a laid-back kind of soldier. Taking someone on a date on the battlefield - I wonder where he intends to go? However, despite looking young, Gray had a well-trained body. Perhaps he's a seasoned veteran.

"I've completed the treatment. I'll provide you with oral rehydration salts, so please take them as soon as possible. If you notice any blood in your urine or anything else within the next 24 hours, please report it to either me or another medic immediately."
"Thanks, and sorry to trouble you. ...Ow, it hurts."
"I'm sorry, my skills were not enough to completely heal you."
"No, no, just stopping the bleeding is more than enough. Honestly, I thought I was going to die."

I disinfect Gray's thigh and protect it with a bandage. Gray looks pale, and there is a possibility of significant blood loss, so I also give him water.

"I have successfully stopped the bleeding, and as long as he isn't shot again, I guarantee the safety of Gray, First-Class Infantry."
"I see. Well then, I'll be careful."
"Is it over? Then Gray, join our friendly support. Touli, hide in the trench that the enemy dug."

Following the instructions of the squad leader, I took refuge in the trench. I am not armed and only have medical supplies and equipment in my backpack, so I cannot participate in combat to begin with. Fortunately, our friendly forces caught up with us and we joined forces, successfully securing the area.

"Combat is over! All members, switch with the rear unit and maintain control of this area!"

Eventually, another squad came and took over the front line, ending today's battle. On this day, we succeeded in advancing 31 meters. Although we didn't fully recover from the previous enemy invasion, we were able to get revenge.

"Hahaha, great victory! Today, our squad only lost one person and we advanced 31 meters! It's been a long time since we've had such an efficient march."

Squad Leader Garback laughed heartily.

"If the other squads had advanced a little faster, we could have taken back the previous defeat. If only I had ten more people..."

...After the battle was over, I listened to the squad leader's words and looked around again. Then, I realized that there were only seven members of the Garback squad. One person was missing.

"Squad leader, shall we do that thing just in case?"
"Oh, right. Ahh, the life of Scout Rendle was the cornerstone of our victory. The 31 meters we advanced were the fruit of Rendle's life."
"..."
"Everyone, salute the brave Scout Rendle."

We saluted for a few seconds towards Rendle, a scout whose whereabouts were unknown. Later, I heard that he desperately followed the squad leader's charge, neglecting his surroundings, and was shot in the head. And he was still a rookie, having only been a soldier for a year.

"Well, let's go back and have a drink. I'll grab some ale from the warehouse as a reward."
"Thank you very much, Squad Leader!"
"Hahaha, you're welcome."

No one here is grieving for Rendle's death. Garback is smiling happily and the other squad members have cheerful expressions.

"Salsa, Touli. You survived well for maggots. I'll let you sit in on this special occasion."
"...Thank you for your consideration, sir."
"In exchange, be sure to prepare some entertainment!"

Even though someone has died, why are they so cheerful?

Oh, right. This is a battlefield. Death is probably not uncommon here.

"Are you okay? Your face looks pale, Touli."
"There's no problem. It seems like Salsa is the one who's lost color."
"I'm fine. I'm okay."

What kind of face did Rendle, the scout, have? What was his personality like? As someone who has never talked to him, I don't know anything about him. Even if a stranger dies, it shouldn't concern me.

And yet, why do I feel this rising nausea?

"...Hey, Touli. Why are those guys laughing?"
"Perhaps it's because they achieved their tactical goal in today's battle."
"I see. That must be it."

I have to endure it. This daily life, where death is just around the corner, is our "battlefield". Rendle, the scout, may have died, but his sacrifice was beneficial to our country.

Therefore, I must also smile. 

"Hey there, rookies. Don't space out, our squad is taking over and retreating."
"Y-yes, senpai!"
"Oh, you still look gloomy. When a comrade dies, all rookies tend to feel the same way. Don't worry about it, focus on something else."

Gray First-Class Infantry, who I treated earlier, came to us to see if we were okay. It seems that I caused trouble for my senior because I couldn't sort out my emotions. I need to reflect on this.

"I apologize for the inconvenience, Gray First-Class Infantry. We will begin our retreat immediately."
"Okay, okay. Even Touli-chan, who usually doesn't show her emotions, looks like that. She's pretty."
"I'm ashamed of my own immaturity."

It seems that I've been caught carrying the weight of my comrade's death on my shoulders. Apparently, it shows on my face quite a bit. Could I become the subject of the squad leader's education?

"It's impressive that you can show that expression. We have already given up, so that's why we can't."
"Um, is the death of comrades just a part of your daily routine, Gray-senpai?"
"Well, it's just like attacking the front lines. Death is part of our everyday life. Even I have no guarantee that I'll be alive tomorrow."

Gray-senpai wasn't angry but showed a face of concern for us. It was a kind expression, like that of an adult comforting a child who cried after having a nightmare.

"But, think about it, what is the goal of this war?"
"The goal, sir?"
"Yes, the goal."

Then, Gray gently explained to us.

"We've been fighting here for ten years. Pushing and pulling the battle line like a tug-of-war, endlessly."
"We are in awe of your struggles, senpai."
"That's not important. Do you guys know how to end this war?"

We should also consider the enemy's position. Gray First-Class Infantry said this with a serious face.

"We're struggling a bit now, but we can still fight. If we conscript all the young men who are still in the homeland, we can keep going for another ten years."
"..."
"The enemy should also have plenty of troops left to recruit."

That might be true. I had a healing magic aptitude, so I couldn't refuse the draft. However, most of my friends from the orphanage are not military personnel and are working in town. Only Bernie, who joined the army at the same time as me, volunteered, not drafted.

In other words, there may still be people in the homeland who can be drafted. However, if we recruit that many people, this country's production capacity will be devastated.

"Trench warfare is when the defensive side has an absolute advantage. The side that is holed up in the trench shoots at the attacking side. No matter how hard they struggle, the attacking side will suffer greater losses once this situation arises."
"Well, that's certainly true."
"Also, the magical forces do a good job, but it's impossible to wipe out all the soldiers holed up in the trenches with just that bombing. The enemy is desperate to survive with defensive spells and anti-bombing equipment, waiting to shoot and kill us when we charge after the shelling ends."

Indeed, it's much more advantageous to fight back from the trenches. That's why we take our time and thoroughly attack with the magicians.

"The war will continue for another ten years. Do you really think you can survive as a front-line soldier in a place where there is no guarantee that you will survive tomorrow, for ten years? "
"That's something you either pray to God for or try your best."
"It's impossible. We are going to die here, that's already been determined."

Resignation, that's what it means. Gray-senpai smiled sadly.

"Death is the goal. It's the salvation from God who says, 'You've done well so far, I'll release you now.'"
".... But what if we break through the enemy's position and capture their capital?"
"It's impossible. The form of warfare has changed. Unlike the time when cavalry and such were active, firearms and explosives have become widespread all over the world, resulting in trench warfare becoming the mainstay of war."
"...."
"There is no end to trench warfare. Even if you retreat after losing, all you have to do is dig a new hole and it becomes a strong defensive position. So there's no way to invade the enemy's capital all at once like we used to."

It's easy to understand by this point, Gray continued.

"Those who died have reached their goal. They are lucky ones who have escaped from this kind of hell. Even Rendle is probably having a fun party with his fallen comrades by now."
"Is that your philosophy of life and death, Gray-senpai?"
"If we don't think that way, we can't survive as front-line soldiers. Death is salvation for us, it's the right we've been granted by God."
".... Um, but I still don't want to die."
"Well, that's natural. You and Touli-chan haven't experienced enough to reach that level of enlightenment. But someday, you'll understand."

Gray First-Class Infantry put his hand on Salsa and Pon's heads and said, "Someday, those who can't die will envy the dead ones."

With that, he concluded the conversation.

After being scolded by Gray-senpai for spacing out, Salsa and I walked side by side towards the tent of our squad leader.

"Do you envy those who can die? I don't understand it."
"I feel the same way, Private Salsa."

After returning to our base, it seems that tonight there will be a party hosted by Squad Leader Garback. According to Gray-senpai, when the squad leader drinks, he becomes 50% more unreasonable than usual, so we can't be late.

"I don't want to die. In this lonely place, I don't want to become a piece of meat covered in maggots and rolling around like garbage."
"I feel the same way."
"But... after being on the battlefield for a long time, I wonder if I'll start thinking like that too. Will I start seeking death as a release?"
"Well, isn't that up to your own philosophy on life and death?"

Salsa-kun seems to be deeply contemplating Gray-senpai's words from earlier. Indeed, Gray-senpai's expression when he was advising us earlier was so calm that it seemed insane.

"Gray-senpai is probably just too kind-hearted."
"Kind-hearted?"

From those words, I feel like I caught a glimpse of his true nature. Gray-senpai is probably a very kind person at heart.

"What's so kind about seeking death as a release?"
"Well, it could be simply to distract oneself from the fear of dying."

Death is a release. If Gray-senpai truly believes in such a distorted idea, then he should have already committed suicide. He may have said those things to us, but he is probably afraid of death himself.

But even more than that.

"What else is there?"
"Perhaps Gray-senpai believes that his fallen comrades are being saved in the afterlife, and that's the only thing keeping him sane?"

I couldn't help but think that was the case.