Chronic Fomo

Filza N. 11.23.25

THE DIGITAL PRESSURE NO ONE TALKS ABOUT.

FOMO, which stands for the fear of missing out, is the uncomfortable sense that others are having more fun, increasing their success, and living fuller, richer lives. FOMO usually comes from comparing yourself with those you know well, but it can also arise in parasocial relationships—emotional, one-way relationships with influencers or celebrities you view on social media. When you observe individuals engaging in experiences you desire for yourself, it can lead to a gradual loss of self-worth and potentially impact the meaning you attribute to your achievements.

In recent years, FOMO has increasingly victimized adolescents. Parents and educators have cited extended screen time and social media exposure as the leading contributors to elevating feelings of FOMO. Adolescent specialists are now suggesting that social media is driving FOMO in a very typical way. A single social media post of peers attending an outing, event, or social gathering can initiate feelings of exclusion. In adolescence, this can heighten levels of self-doubt or lower levels of self-esteem due to the fear of missing out, in addition to other psychosocial difficulties.

Research from the 2015 National Stress and Wellbeing in Australia Survey illustrates an interesting paradox: while heavy teenage users of social media report stronger relationships with others, those same adolescents experience diminished burnout levels and fewer concerns about social validation (likes and comments) when they intentionally limit their usage.

This indicates that moderated social media use might lessen the psychological toll of FOMO. Dr. Sullivan points out that social media’s continuous growth has created an environment in which FOMO becomes almost unavoidable. “We have access to everything 24/7,” she says. “Most of us are active on several different platforms, and the nature of the feeds creates an ongoing sense that we are either missing out or not living up to our potential.” In many ways, people are constantly comparing themselves, and the anxiety of having to stay up to date, relevant, or socially included intensifies. 

However, FOMO goes beyond social media. It can arise in any given circumstance where we infer missing out on experiences or friendships, or fear we are simply falling behind. More importantly, FOMO can serve as a symptom of deeper psychological distress, which may include increased cortisol levels, ongoing chronic stress, and depression. The compulsive and habitual urge to constantly check profiles, follow trends, decipher social cues, and endlessly browse someone else’s curated material is not just a nuanced experience of adolescence or social media algorithms; often, it comes from deeper emotional wounds tangled with unmet, critical psychological needs. FOMO can significantly impact the emotional wellbeing of young people, as it can lead to an increase in feelings of exclusion, hopelessness, and instability.

Young people who have experienced loneliness and/or rejection become more aware of social interactions and displays of friendship among others. Additionally, those with low self-esteem are more likely to make negative comparisons to idealized representations of peers’ collective socializing online. Experiencing FOMO may contribute to feelings of anxiety and depression, creating a cycle in which adolescents look to social media for external validation of social connection, but then leave feeling worse than before. Further, when core psychological needs (e.g., competence, autonomy, and relatedness) are not met, young people react more strongly to perceived lost opportunities. Life transitions or instability might also amplify fears about inadequacy around peers, making adolescents feel as though they are socially or developmentally lagging behind their peers.