Children have all the same emotions we do and often feel things very intensely. They don't, however, always have the words to express those feelings, nor do they have the impulse control to stop themselves from doing something inappropriate, like hitting or throwing something. We can help children learn to identify their emotions and help them learn ways to express those feelings in appropriate, healthy ways.

Telling a child to stop crying or not to be scared doesn't make their sadness or fear go away. It may make us feel better not to have to see the child's distress, but it may also teach the child that her feelings are not okay and that she has to hide how she feels. What we want to do is to teach her that it is okay to feel however she feels, and that there are healthy ways to express those feelings.


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One thing I am working on (it's really hard) is to simply validate a child's feelings when she is upset and reflect it back to her, without trying to tell her: how to fix it, why it's not so bad, or trying to coax her out of it. Imagine your child is sad because the paper she was coloring got ripped. Now try to imagine simply saying, "That really stinks. I'm sorry your paper is ripped. You are sad/mad about that." But DON'T say, "But we can fix it with tape," or "You can make a new one." That is so hard to do!

Denial is understandable. It seems easier to avoid certain problems, traumatic memories, and difficult feelings. However, we all know that avoidance isnt a good long-term strategy. Often, the longer we try to ignore things, the bigger the problems become. So, why do we deny our problems or pretend to be okay?

We also use Im fine to shield ourselves from painful feelings. In general, codependents are uncomfortable with emotions. Most of us grew up in families where we werent allowed to be angry or sad. We were told to stop crying or we were punished when we expressed our feelings, or our feelings were ignored. As a result, we learned to suppress our feelings and to numb them with food or alcohol or other compulsive behaviors. Many of us also grew up with parents who couldnt regulate their own emotions. For example, if you had a parent who raged, you may be afraid of anger and want to avoid being angry or angering others. Or if you had a parent who was deeply depressed, you may be unconsciously compelled to avoid your own feelings of sadness, grief, or hopelessness. And after years of suppressing and numbing your feelings, you may not even be aware of them. So, you may say, Im fine because you really dont know how you feel.

If youve been denying your feelings and problems for years, its not easy to start digging into the messy stuff beneath the surface. But if were going to truly feel better and create more authentic and satisfying relationships, we have to acknowledge that were not fine, that we are struggling, hurt, afraid, or angry, and that we have unmet needs. A therapist or sponsor can provide valuable support when difficult feelings come up and gently challenge your denial if you get stuck.

And finally, please know that youre not the only one struggling with these issues and you didnt cause them. You are, however, the only one who can start to change them. You can slowly start to think and act differently, you can validate your feelings and needs, and be more of your true self. Some people may have a hard time with the changes you make, but others will be drawn to the more assertive, authentic version of you. Most importantly, I think youll be happier with yourself when you know yourself better and can acknowledge more of your feelings and experiences.

Physical: Are you okay with public displays of affection? Does affection make you uncomfortable? Do you hate it or love it when your partner tickles you? Do you need a lot of alone time? Learn more about physical boundaries and abuse.

Sexual: Do you need to get to know your partner a while before engaging in any kind of sexual activity, or are you okay getting physical right away? What sexual activity are you okay with? Learn more about sexual boundaries and abuse.

Where and when to have an important conversation: When talking about something important, talk when you are feeling calm or take some time to cool down if you had a fight. Talk about your concerns before they become problems and get worse. Make sure you are talking privately so you can be open about your feelings.

If you feel angry, you don't have to pretend that everything is okay. It's not healthy to keep it inside you. Sometimes anger can be helpful in the short term, for it may motivate you to take action. But having constant anger or resentment won't feel good to you or the people around you. Talk with your family and friends about your anger. Or, ask your doctor to refer you to a counselor.

You can also do things that are more special to you, like being in nature or praying in a place that has meaning for you. Or it could be playing a game you love or cooking a good meal. Whatever you choose, embrace the things that bring you joy when you can.

People have found that when they express strong feelings like anger or sadness, they're more able to let go of them. Some sort out their feelings by talking to friends or family, other cancer survivors, a support group, or a counselor. But even if you prefer not to discuss your cancer with others, you can still sort out your feelings by thinking about them or writing them down.

It can be hard for people to know how to talk to you about your cancer. Often loved ones mean well, but they don't know what to say or how to act. If you want to talk, you can make them feel more at ease by asking them what they're thinking or how they're feeling. And if you don't want to talk about it, it's okay to say that too. You can let them know when you're ready to talk.

At this age, children are more able to talk about their thoughts and feelings and can better handle difficulties, but they still look to parents for comfort and guidance. Listening to them demonstrates your commitment. When scary things happen, seeing that parents can still parent may be the most reassuring thing for a frightened child.

"Perhaps I am a particularly robust 59 year old - I like to think I am - or was blessed with getting only a mild case of Covid 19. But after a week or so of what I would describe as a 'Turbo-charged Flu', I came out of it feeling okay," Taylor wrote.

The cloud usually lifts, though, especially when you remind yourself you need to focus on responsibilities like work or childcare. You might continue feeling blue for several days, perhaps longer, but you can usually work around this mood to get things done.

They are what make you, YOU. All humans have feelings and they can be messy. There can be highs and lows. Often teens, because of their life experiences and changing hormones feel things on a more intense level than adults do. The same emotional intensity that can cause you angst can also give you energy and enthusiasm.

Unwanted or unexpected symptoms or feelings that occur when you take medicine are called side effects. Side effects can be relatively minor, such as a headache or a dry mouth. They can also be life-threatening, such as severe bleeding or damage to the liver or kidneys. The side effects of some medications can also affect your driving.

After my mother died, I felt like my love for her was defined by my pain and suffering. My mother's death was devastating, so it was only right that I should feel devastated for a devastatingly long time. For me, feeling okay seemed like getting over it or moving on, which I wasn't ready to do. Not only did feeling better feel inconceivable, but it felt wrong.

For example, I didn't realize that "getting over it" and "moving on" weren't even a part of the grief process. I didn't know that a person could bring their loved one with them as they move forward in life. I didn't know that my grief would eventually become a part of my okay-ness.

You view different opinions as a personal challenge. Do you believe that your way is always right and get angry when others disagree? If you have a strong need to be in control or a fragile ego, you may interpret other perspectives as a challenge to your authority, rather than simply a different way of looking at things.

While okaying the feelings during a tantrum is important, never underestimate the value of what you do during the calmer moments. What you teach outside of a tantrum is just as important as your actions in the middle of one.

Even during the saddest funeral services, there are moments of joy and laughter, which showcases the varied emotions associated with grief, the combination of pain with pleasureful moments, says GoodTherapy. Keep in mind that grief is fluid and changes as time passes. Feelings of pain and fear can transform, grip us less fierce at times, and even become part of your everyday life. The grief and feelings of loss may peel back over time, then come back and hit you like a wave when you least expect it. 17dc91bb1f

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