Jesus has invited you back into a healthy relationship and fellowship with God through accepting Him and what He has done for you.  He wants to bring you back into the family again and to take part in His future plans and purpose for all of His creation.  He has given you free-will to decide.  

SALVATION IS AVAILABLE TO ANYONE, BUT IT HAS TO BE ACCEPTED.  IT IS A FREE GIFT  OFFERED FROM GOD - HIS WAY -ONLY TROUGH JESUS

[Mat 7:14 KJV] Because strait [is] the gate, and narrow [is] the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.

[Jhn 14:6 KJV] Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

IT'S A GIFT - HE BOUGHT IT FOR YOU - IT CAN NOT BE EARNED ON YOUR OWN MERIT

[Eph 2:8 KJV] For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: [it is] the gift of God:

[Eph 2:9 KJV] Not of works, lest any man should boast.

Therefore, salvation is a free gift.  God freely made a way to save you from the eternal death penalty of sin & His righteouss judgement for sinners.  This offer can only be accepted or rejected by believing and putting your faith in Jesus and His righteousness, not your own self-righteousness or methods.  

Jesus always was, always will be, and He is the Beginning and the End.  He the Truth, and there is no sin in Him.  God is not a man, that He should lie, and of course He has free-will.  

Since He made us in His image He granted us all free-will to live and make choices as we go.  He did not make us robots who have no say in their programing.  

Sadly we continue to hurt ourselves and other parts of His creation.  He is patient, and willing to be merciful, not wanting us to suffer death, and to prove it He came in a form we could see and know Him in.  He lived just like us, but as the Son of God He lived perfect.  He made Himself available to be The Savior of mankind to all those who believe. 

You either believe He came to pay for your salvation, and is alive, and because you believe that you have put your faith in Jesus to perform His promises, or you don't.  

As for our relationship with God, through Jesus God has proved His love for us all by sending His Son Jesus to die in place of us, and in order to pay for sins we've comitted when we profess His Son's righteousness and not our own.

[Jhn 14:6 KJV] 6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

[Jhn 8:24 KJV] 24 I said therefore unto you, that ye shall die in your sins: for if ye believe not that I am [he], ye shall die in your sins.

[Mar 8:34-35 KJV] 34 And when he had called the people [unto him] with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. 35 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.

[Luk 24:45-47 KJV] 45 Then opened he their understanding, that they might understand the scriptures, 46 And said unto them, Thus it is written, and thus it behoved Christ to suffer, and to rise from the dead the third day: 47 And that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in his name among all nations, beginning at Jerusalem.

Comment I relate to : 

For me, I had to grapple with Calvinism when I began to realize that practically every well-known preacher is a Calvinist. 

I was blown away by that, and I had to figure out if all of these intelligent, educated men were believing and accepting the whole counsel of God, and I wasn't....

That said : I do not choose to make God a liar with my doctrine.  He tells people they have a choice.  God will save anyone who asks, and believes in their heart.  He asked me to repent and believe, and I don't think He made me sin...the conditions were there and I commited sins...I trust He gave me free will to decide who to serve and I am glad I was saved by grace that is offered.   Now He's asked me to share the gospel so that others can be hear.

[Romans 3:4 KJV]

God forbid: yea, let God be true, but every man a liar; as it is written, That thou mightest be justified in thy sayings, and mightest overcome when thou art judged.

[Numbers 23:19 KJV]

God [is] not a man, that he should lie; neither the son of man, that he should repent: hath he said, and shall he not do [it]? or hath he spoken, and shall he not make it good?

[Romans 10:14 KJV]

How then shall they call on him in whom they have not believed? and how shall they believe in him of whom they have not heard? and how shall they hear without a preacher?