Did cats like Cat Heaven?
Yes.
No.
Maybe.
The thing is, nothing really important comes from Cat Heaven. Everything was about more perfume, more burgers, the bread was too stale, they needed to hire more Cat Cupids to shoot two random cats and decide they should be a couple. But that wasn't a good idea. Love needs to actually come from the heart.
Anyway, Cat Heaven was in pretty good shape, except for the sick minister. Miss Lucia had to take over his job. No doubt he’d be retired to go live as a random cat surfing the waves at Cat Heaven’s Tropical Beach.
“Tropical surfing,” the minister said sadly. “Oh, how I’ll become a surfer.”
“Er…doesn’t everybody become a surfer?” The nurse beside him said, checking his heartbeat.
“YOWCH!” He screamed in pain as the nurse quickly tied a tourniquet onto his arm and stuck a shot in, then pulled it out.
A little kitten with bruises all over his body peeked into the room. “Nurse, can you tell me the story about Wisher’s Village again?”
“Of course, child,” the nurse said. “Once upon a time, there was an ugly kitten in Cat Heaven. She was a sad, lonely, and wimpy kitten. The kittens at her Heaven school bullied her. But she loved listening to her great-grandfather’s stories. One day, she came back from school with a black eye over her dirty white fur, and begged her great-grandfather to tell her a story.”
“Yay!” The kitten squealed, bouncing up and down. “My favorite part! A story in a story!”
The nurse laughed and went on, “her great-grandfather told her the story. It was about an ugly cat who was smart, clever, courageous, and kind. But the thing she didn’t have and wished for was beauty. So, she journeyed to a distant place called Wishers’ Village. There, in a little shop, was a beautiful enchantress cat. She could grant any wishes, but there was a price to pay. You must take a test to prove she was worthy of it.”
The little kitten sat forward, his eyes wide.
“The ugly cat went to her to seek help. She was tested in battle, education, and kindness. Finally, a week later, after the enchantress cat discussed with her council, she told the ugly cat the great news that she had passed the test. Then, the enchantress told her to wish for something.” The nurse meowed.
“TO BE PRETTY!” The kitten said, bouncing.
“Yes, child. She wished to be beautiful. The enchantress nodded and started to glow like a thousand bright lights. Then, she threw her light to the ugly cat and when the light faded, standing where the ugly cat had been before stood a beautiful pure white cat. Later on, she was known as the Most Beautiful Cat, Smartest Cat, Kindest Cat, Cleverest Cat, Bravest Cat, and so on. She had earned a perfect life in Cat Heaven,” the nurse finished. “And that is how the cat got her wishes granted. By working hard.”
“WOW! I’M GOING TO BE LIKE HER!” The kitten said. “POW! BOOM! I’M GOING TO BE A SUPERHERO!”
“Now, now. You can be a superhero later. For now, let’s go to sleep and get some rest before you start being a superhero tomorrow,” the nurse said. “Please go back to your room. Nurse Clover will read you a bedtime story later.”
“Yay!” The kitten cheered and ran back to his room.
“Can I journey to Wisher’s Village and wish to stay as minister forever?” The minister asked.
“No. You’re sick, and you should let somebody else have a chance,” the nurse said. “For now, you should rest.”
“WHY DO I ALWAYS HAVE TO REST?!” The minister shouted. “YOU ALWAYS TELL ME TO REST!”
“You need to rest, you whiny kitten!” The nurse scolded. “Do you want to end up in the Ghost World?”
“NO!” The minister cried. “I DON’T WANT TO!”
“That is why!” The nurse harrumphed, lashing her tail. “Respect your nurses! Now, the doctor will see you in five minutes. And don’t do anything crazy!
“Humph. I won’t,” The minister turned away. “As if!”
“I have a feeling that you will do something crazy,” the nurse said before leaving the room.
“I won’t. But I’ll be bored,” the minister said to himself.
“I KNOW YOU WILL! THAT’S THE POINT OF LEARNING PATIENCE, YOU WHINY KITTEN!” The nurse yelled from outside the door.
“Hey! Stop calling me a whiny kitten! You’re an annoying kitten that knows nurse stuff!” The minister snarled. “I know addition! And the ABCs! I’m smart! I know that six plus six equals to thirteen!”
“Um…” The nurse sighed.
“Now, should I do something crazy?” The minister mused.
“NO!” The nurse shouted, exasperated. “Definitely not! The sick are not supposed to be crazy and wild! Please don’t break the hospital! And please don’t be crazy! Or we’re sending you to Animal Control!”
“Wait, there’s Animal Control in Cat Heaven?” The minister asked, confused.
“Your memory must be slowing. We’ll check later. And besides, you created Animal Control! There are crazy animals out there and you bravely took the job,” the nurse praised. “The animals in Animal Control are kept in separate rooms, but the rooms are extraordinary. Anything that the animal needs pops up. They just have to get medicine and shots for the craziness.”
“Have you ever met any crazy animals before?” The minister asked, suddenly interested.
“Oh, yes. I was on a tour before I came to this hospital, and we were on a safari, looking at animals in a little Jeep. Typical, right? It’s all over those advertisements on the television,” the nurse laughed. “Anyway, we met this wild lion and it flipped over our Jeep! Luckily, I had my iPhone 1241, with cameras all over the back and a secret compartment for emergencies and food, and I called Animal Control! The lion nearly killed me but I scrambled up a tree just in time.”
“Wow!” The minister gasped in awe. “You’re so brave!”
“Well, do you have any stories?” The nurse asked teasingly. “I bet you can’t beat mine!”
“Oh, yes I can!” The minister cackled. “Guess what? My son was the minister who did all that wedding stuff and the Ivy and Arrow’s wedding! And they’re the winners of the Diamond Kingdom race and Ivy’s the daughter of the queen of Diamond Kingdom! Isn’t that amazing!”
The nurse looked only a bit impressed. “It doesn’t beat mine, though!”
The minister sighed. “I know, I’ll always be a lame cat. I’m scared of mice, too. That’s why I only eat the tasteless cat pellets that humans give their cats. Although I’m a stray, I still am soft on the inside.”
“You’re scared of mice?!” The nurse gasped, shocked.
“It’s okay, you can laugh,” the minister said glumly. “Everybody laughs. I’m used to it, so it’s alright.”
“I’m not laughing! You shouldn’t be so glum!” The nurse scolded. “That’s alright! But my question is, how do you survive those disgusting cat pellets? Mice are juicy and tasty, I mean, what cat wouldn’t like it?”
“A cat like me,” the minister sighed.
The nurse made a disapproving noise and harrumphed. “Smile! Right now! We don’t like people getting emotional in the hospital!”
The minister sighed and showed his teeth in an awkward way. “Better? Happy?”
The nurse lashed her tail. “You have a lot to work on. You look like a shark, with those rows and rows of teeth but never really smiling. I’m going to tutor you as you recover from your unknown illness. The shots don’t seem to be working, and you’re going to retire anyway,” she called for some mice. “I’m getting hungry.”
“Does that mean you’re going to eat me?!” The minister gasped, trying to scooch as far as possible from the nurse, who was popping an aspirin in her mouth and shaking her head.
“I’m leaving. Your doctor is coming any second now,” the nurse said. “Try not to glum!”
“No! Don’t leave me! I’m too scared!” The minister sobbed.
The nurse winked and left.
“Mommy,” Raven said, nudging Ivy. “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! MOMMY! MOMMY!”
“WHAT?!” Ivy groaned as she stretched. Arrow stirred beside her on the platinum bed. “Raven, you have to stop waking mommy up! I said if you behaved, then we could go to play with Roxy and Rocky!”
“No, it’s not that!” Raven whined, lashing her long black tail. “Yesterday Roxy’s mommy took us to the hospital to get free kittypops. Then we heard this nurse tell a story about Wisher’s Village or something, but I want to go to Wisher’s Village!”
“You heard about that story?” Ivy said, horrified. “I was going to tell you when you were old enough!”
“What’s going on?” Arrow asked, yawning.
“Raven and Leo heard about the Wisher’s Village story,” Ivy said, shaking Arrow so he could fully awaken.
“So it’s real?!” Raven gasped, her jaw dropping.
“I’m afraid so,” Ivy sighed.
Raven started to do a happy dance, but then glared at Ivy. “Why are you afraid of Wisher’s Village?”
“Because when the parents tell their kitten that story, all the kittens want to go,” Ivy explained, licking her fur in exasperation.
“Well, too bad!” Raven stuck her tiny pink tongue out. “I want to go! You better get your food now!”
“We already did, like, five years ago!” Arrow chuckled. “Just in case.”
“Okay, now let’s go! I’ll wake Leo up, and if you don’t go, I’m going with Leo and Roxy’s family!” Raven said.
“Well, she trapped us there,” Ivy sighed. “What a smart kitten.”
Raven ran to Leo’s room and slapped him awake with her tail.
“OW! WHAT IN THE DIAMONDS, RAVEN?!” Leo shouted, slapping her back. “YOU FILTHY MOSQUITO!”
Raven squealed and dodged his tail. “We’re going to Wisher’s Village!”
“Now?! It’s literally seven in the morning!” Leo yelled. “Let me sleep in peace, Raven! You’re so annoying!”
“Well, then, we’re going without you! Roxy’s family is coming!” Raven harrumphed, stomping her paw on the ground.
“Really? Let’s go!” Leo jumped up excitedly.