the bells of sadness are ringing in my head.
there goes doubting sleighing in the atmosphere.
can't believe that i'm nineteen here,
i used to perceive life as colorful and bright.
now when i stand in the living room of no Christmas tree,
there's just Christ from above feeling sorry for me.
if one of the angels were my friend,
maybe Angelica would be one of them
so I'll be nice and easy to get with.
Santa used to make me cry
oh, i knew he was never real,
though my cousins believed in them than i
was it maybe 'cause they're rich?
i cried in my bedroom after my rabbit died,
and spent New Year's Eve alone with my mama cause i was joy-deprived.
how ironic has that sounded, my mom's name is joy
but there's always darkness i feel when i'm around her noise.
the bells of sadness are ringing in my head.
there goes loneliness landing on my bed.
i love to love, especially on holidays
an album of who i was is a gift i refuse to get.
ring, ring, i sound so mean.
clink, clink, the wines are for me.
ho, ho, nobody wants to scream 'cause only me wants to ruin things.
the bells of desperation are ringing in my head.
there goes Jezebel hanging with boredom somewhere.
ring, ring, i sound so mean.
clink, clink, the wines are for me.