Distant Relationships: When He Keeps Promising to Come Visit... But Never Does

Hi, this is Punny.

While I’m preparing my project for launch, I’ve been writing down my observations about modern relationships. Maybe they’ll be useful to someone.

Today my internet is acting up, so I finally sat down to read the book The Gen Z by Gregg L. Witt and Derek E. Baird.

The book was written by an older generation, and it feels like they collected every possible idealistic fantasy about Gen Z. The authors portray us as free, active, passionate fighters for equality and inclusivity… but in reality, I see many of us slowly drowning in loneliness, struggling with basic communication, and facing the harsh truth that not everyone becomes a millionaire by age 20 like TikTok and Instagram suggest. You also can’t stay young forever. Oh the horror — 35+ is basically old age. It feels like life is about to end any minute.

I wonder if Gen Z will get a second wind once we finally throw away these unrealistic beliefs.

Some people chase trends and inject Botox to fight natural wrinkles that appear after years of Instagram filters distorting their real faces. They spend everything they earn on expensive things and don’t save anything.

Others go in the opposite direction — they close themselves off, rarely leave the house, and spend their time gaming or working fully remotely.

As a result, 80% of Zoomers suffer from loneliness, only 10% have children after age 20, and 46% overall aren’t even interested in relationships with the opposite sex.

One of the main reasons? We have no idea who’s actually behind the avatar.

Online, people say whatever they think or just vent without filters. They aren’t used to being polite or friendly because the other person is far away anyway. But offline, when you meet in person, you realize there’s a real human sitting across from you — and suddenly you’re worried about not offending them or coming across as “weird.”

Romantic relationships are turning into long-distance ones before they’ve even properly started.

One of my friends started dating a guy in a game. They texted and called for a long time. Naturally, things were supposed to progress to an in-person meeting, and the girl was counting on him coming to visit.

If you’ve ever been in this situation, you probably know the feeling — when he asks you to pay for plane ticket and hotel from your own budget, split the restaurant 50/50, and maybe even cover his gas. Does that feel right? Probably not.

I often read stories from girls who are disappointed by exactly this kind of scenario.

And then there’s the other version: he keeps promising he’ll come visit. You’re already jokingly trying on wedding dresses in your mind, but the meeting keeps getting postponed because of “small problems” that somehow turn into major catastrophes.

You just keep waiting… and waiting. You’re stuck in limbo, not realizing that nothing was ever really there.

I think many Zoomers will start actually living only after 30 — once it finally becomes clear that the “any day now, life will be just like Instagram with constant travel and luxury” phase is never coming.

Only then will a new reality open up — one without the pressure of perfection, where it’s okay to show your real feelings and express your opinions calmly without fear. Right now, that scares them.

I hope my project ACE Magic Academy becomes a place where people can experience their time together differently.