Talk about touching as safe or unsafe rather than good or bad. This removes any guilt a child might feel if they feel uncomfortable about an interaction.

A safe touch is one that makes us feel comfortable, loved, calm, supported, and/or included.

Unsafe touching can make us feel uncomfortable, confused, scared, embarrassed, weird, and/or hurt.

Being able to talk with your children about safe and unsafe touching can feel uncomfortable and it is so important that caregivers welcome these conversations before there's a problem, so that kids feel confident that their needs will be met and their feelings will be heard. When done properly, your child will be equipped with the confidence to speak up for themselves.

Students learn a simple rule to stay safe from strangers!

"If you don't know, you don't go!"

It can be hard to tell a safe stranger from an unsafe stranger. This simple rule says that if someone tries to move you from where you are and take you someplace different they are an unsafe stranger. ALWAYS ask your grown-up before going anywhere with anyone, even if it's someone you know.

Consider the suggestions below. They may make the conversation easier for everyone.

• Keep the lines of communication open about sexual development, behavior, abuse, and their own body.

• Use the proper names for all body parts. This includes identifying part of the body as private.

• Let your child know that they need to tell you or another "safe adult" if anyone touches or tries to see their private parts, or does anything that makes them feel uncomfortable. Emphasize "secret touches" - those touches that someone has told them not to tell anyone about.

• Tell your child that some children and adults have touching problems. These people can make secret touching look accidental, and they should still tell you even if they think the touch might have been accidental.

• Help your child understand that these people who have touching problems need special help so they don't continue with the inappropriate touching.

• Tell your child that people who touch them will not want anyone to know. They will try and make them keep the touch a secret. Tell your child that those secrets "are not kept in our family."

• Give your child examples of what someone might say or use to get them to keep their secret such as: candy, money, special privileges, threats, subtle fear of loss, separation or punishment.

• Brainstorm with your child all the "safe people" in their lives whom they can confide; such as teachers, parents, extended family, neighborhood adults - an adult is only a safe adult if the child feels safe with them.

Our 4th and 5th grade students learn SMART rules to stay safe while using tech

• ALWAYS ask adult permission. . .

• NEVER meet anyone you haven't seen in person

• Talk to an adult if there are inappropriate, dangerous, or scary conversations happening

• Block people who don't make you feel safe. Do not engage in conversation with these people.

• NEVER share your personal information without a grown-ups permission.

• What you post online stays online from pictures or words. I tell kids, if you don't want your grandma seeing it, don't post it.

Thank you for having courageous conversations with your children! They appreciate you.