By: Sandra Chavez
If you’re lactose intolerant just don’t be, it’s that easy. Why take away the joy of eating ice cream or any dairy product when all you can do is just stop being lactose intolerant? Take this fantastic advice from our girl, former first lady, Nancy Reagan; just saying no solves every problem.
Being lactose intolerant is almost as bad as having a peanut allergy, like c'mon, you’re letting nuts beat you? A zombie apocalypse hits and boom you’re dead - and not even from getting your brains eaten by the undead. You find some random granola bars or cookies but you’re allergic to it because it was made in a factory that processes nuts or whatever - BOOM you’re dead. You somehow find a cow but you’re lactose intolerant - BOOM you’re dead. At this point, if you die it’s your fault for not being able to handle it. Personally, I wouldn’t let nuts or milk kill me, but that’s just me.
On a serious note, why don’t you just become more tolerant? Changing restaurant plans or ordering special dishes just because one person can’t have anything with dairy. You’re also forced to stop multiple times while driving because your lactose-intolerant friend drank or ate something with dairy. Having to stop so they can blow up the toilet while you wait for hours because they couldn’t handle the little rumbling in their tummy. At this point, I’m surprised these types of people even have friends. Why would you even want to associate yourself with people who will only make going out a lot more difficult? Who do they think they are? Invading our homes and markets with their disgusting lactose-free milk. Stand up for yourself and go against these people who are ruining the world with soy, oat, and almond milk. We need to put an end to this pandemic!
*This article was written by someone who is definitely not lactose intolerant