HORRORscopes

Spooky Season is here. So are the HORRORscopes a spooky horoscope for the special day.

Ben Levine - Arbiter of all things good, true, and spooky in the universe.

A Capricon deserves Candy- Corn. Ask a Gemini for some.

You will get a lot of candy and your day will be sweet like the candy but look to your past in order to fulfill this dream day.

Today, you must act like a witch, there self involved isolation will be of help.

Skeletons are your enemues today so avoid skinny people.

Watch out for old people they are probably undeads back for another try at life. They also might be your grandma 50/50 chance.

Carve a pumpkin but beware of the knife, it has a tast for blood.

Do not watch horror movies, they will give you nightmares.

Watch out for cliffs and steep drops, today is not a good day for a serious fall.

You will develop moderate to severe bronchitis (Inflamation of the lungs) stay safe and healthy y'all

Stay away from Scorpio, they want to posion so you must strabgle them.

Stay away from Libra tehy want to strangle you so you must posion them.

Watch above you, falling objects are a real danger todya.

Please note: The Jayhawk Journal does not condone any violence or drugs as seen in the HORRORscopes. Please do not do drugs and do not harm others.

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