Teh News
 

April 20th, 2007

Recent reports have indicated that Phil Gorman may have battled Dr. James Moriarty either physically or intellectually. The distinction is trivial since Phil would surely be killed instantly by either. Phil is infamous for doing only the most inane portions of his job.

The most up-to-date information says the dialogue went as follows:

  • Phil: "OMG! I am teh greetest lab supervizer!!11"
  • Moriarty: "Phil u r terribull at ur job!!!111one"
  • Phil: "I ordured all teh components!"
  • Moriarty: "No u dint! Also u lock all the important things in ur office!11"
  • Phil: "Prepare 4 battal!!11eleven"

The ensuing fight destroyed Sleith Hall and most free standing structures within 10 miles. 12 million people are presumed dead, and another 17 are unaccounted for.