The 9/11 Truther Dist...Ditch...Dictionary

Main 9/11 Links Page

The lighter side of 9/11 insanity

From members of the forums at the James Randi Educational Foundation

Submitted by "Triterope"

jurinal(n.) - A collection of scientific papers of such low quality that it shouldn't be read, but given to a vagrant for use as a travel toilet. Example: "Jurinal of 9-11 Studies."

peer review(n. or v.) - Confirming the quality of a scientific study by looking narrowly at the name of the author, and making sure that person believes in 9/11 conspiracy theories. Example: "Steven Jones has published many peer reviewed papers." Alt. Usage: After a jurinal has been given to a vagrant, this term is pronounced "pee-er review," and refers to a different form of expression.
 
shpill (v.) - When a shill misspeaks and accidentally reveals a piece of the true 9/11 conspiracy. Example: "Donald Rumsfeld shpilled when he said Flight 93 was shot down."
 
censureship(n.) - Intellectual process by which Truthers are ignored, disdained, and ridiculed by the general public for advancing ludicrous and offensive theories about 9/11. Often confused with "censorship."
 
chertoff(v.) - To attempt to discredit a three-year, 15,000-page study done by hundreds of qualified scientists, by fabricating a tenuous connection between any one participant in the study and any one member of the George W. Bush administration. Example: "There's no point in having a new invesigation of 9/11, because the Deniers will just chertoff it when they don't like its conclusion."

CIAGI(n.) - Acronym for the advanced film-making technology used by the government to make planes seem to appear and disappear in downtown Manhattan.
 
craption (n. or v.) - A misleading description of a video or photograph, designed to support a conspiracy theory. Example: "All Steven Jones' evidence for his thermite theory turns out to be craptions."

Err Phone(TM) (n.) - telecommunications device that creates a perfectly accurate forgery of an airplane passenger's voice, but can't be used from an airplane.

errorstorm(n.) - A flawed, dishonest, paranoid conspiracy film created solely to advance one's AM radio career. Also, the name of one such film.

lose change(v.) - To repeatedly change the contents of a film, and downplay what was said in earlier versions. Also, the name of one such film.

whistlebellower(n.) - Person who claims to have observed proof that 9/11 was an inside job, but is actually an irrelevant low-level functionary with a pathological need for attention.

Lauroiat(n.) - Device used to rope conspiracy theorists into uncritically believing fraudulent whistlebellowers. (derived from Lauro Chavez)
 
mannafest(n.) - One of many lists of airplane passengers that rain down from heaven to justify any conspiracy belief about the hijackers.

sourcery(n.) - The act of conjuring a source for a conspiracy claim out of thin air.

kentrail(n.) - Trail of water vapor that appears over conspiracy theorists' heads. Toxic to intelligence, but only harmful if you believe it actually exists.

Killtown (place name) - Where rationality goes to die. Like Lazytown, but even more insipid.

fashism(n.) - Western political system in which conspiracy theorists are troubled when elected political leaders don't agree with them, and when police legally confront them. Often confused with "fascism."

free-for-all speed - Magical speed at which the WTC towers collapsed. May be cited in support of any conclusion about what destroyed them.

grabbity (n.)- Magical force that can act on falling building pieces in any manner necessary to support a conspiracy claim. Often confused with "gravity."

instivestigate(v.) - To try to get someone else to do an investigation.

pretire (v.) To be forced to retire early for making idiotic and embarassing claims, and then pretend it was voluntary. Pronounced pruh-TIRE. Example: "Steven Jones pretired."

quoteminding(v. tr.) - Protecting the sanctity of a quote by providing the full context of what the speaker really said. Opposite of "quote mining." Debunkers, not conspiracy theorists, do this.

redpill(n.) - Required medication for conspiracy theorists. Contents unknown; observed side effects include antisocial behavior, delusions of grandeur, impaired logic, excessive Internet use, selective blindness, and hallucinations. One word, with emphasis on the first syllable, like "redneck."

Me-trix(n.) - Self-centered fantasy world that conspiracy theorists believe they enter after taking a redpill. Pronounced "ME-tricks."
 
pipelie(n.) - A fictional oil pipeline. Typically found in regions that have no natural oil, and would be of no strategic use to any real pipeline. May be used as a conspiracy explanation for any U.S. military action, no matter what other justifications exist. Example: "Lauro Chavez guarded the pipelie in Afghanistan."

rebunk(v.) - To use outdated news articles as source material, never acknowledging that they have long since been corrected. The claims that some hijackers are alive, and that Flight 93 landed in Cleveland, are often rebunked.

de-bait(n. or v.) - When a conspiracy theorist raises what he believes to be an unanswerable conspiracy issue, and then backs away from it or changes the subject after it is destroyed. Often confused with "debate."

scaller(n.) - Any person, of any academic or non-academic background, who called Jim Fetzer on the phone and asked to be listed as a member of his "9-11 Truth" organization. Often confused with "scholar."

suck poppet (n.) - A particularly inept attempt to pose as someone else on an Internet forum. Example: "Looks like pdoherty has another suck poppet."

unsurance(n.) - Financial arrangement whereby the owner of a building can be paid big bucks for ordering it destroyed and blabbing to the media about it, even when the causes of the building's destruction are still unclear. Example: "Larry Silverstein had an unsurance policy on WTC 7." 

woodunit (n.) - a narrative dealing with a well-understood murder or series of murders, in which conspiracy theorists attempt to determine what shadowy global-domination group was really behind it all. Rhymes with "whodunit."

thermaphrodite (n.) - A high-temperature incendiary compound that contains elements of both thermite and thermite, and constantly changes between the two.

poll it (v.) - The act of using incendiary language to blow up an opinion poll such that the 9/11 Truth movement appears to be at least 50 times larger than it actually is.

bollyn
(v.) - The act of noticing a strange car outside your house, assuming it's FBI, calling the police, having the people in the car tell you're they're just undercover local cops, not believing them, threatening them, telling them you're going into the house to get a weapon, getting arrested, losing your job, and then blaming it all on the Jews. Usage Note: Because of the low likelihood of anyone actually being stupid enough to do all these things, the word may be used in a looser sense to describe any attempt to blame a personal misfortune on some shadowy world-domination entity, when it was really your own stupid fault. "Example: All the 9/11 Denier candidates for Congress lost, so they'll probably try to bollyn the results off on Diebold."
 
pretire (v.) To be forced to retire early for making idiotic and embarassing claims, and then pretend it was voluntary. May be pronounced PRE-tire or pruh-TIRE, depending on whether you wish to emphasize the pre- suffix, or make the word sound like "pretend." Example: "Steven Jones pretired."
 
Clock and Awe - the act of badly mistiming the collapse of the WTC towers, claiming the erroneous time proves your own theory, and then gaining an overwhelming feeling of admiration for your own brilliance.
 
errial dumbardment (n.) - The act of attempting to prove a conspiracy by bombing a forum with hundreds of incorrect, outdated, and contradictory links to conspiracy websites. Pronounciation Note: The "B" is not silent.
 
La Resisdunce - any faction of conspiracy theorists that uses revolutionary and militaristic language to describe itself, despite being made up of people who haven't so much as fired a gun their lives.

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Necescalation - Any theory in which it is necessary to believe that a lesser event automatically proves a bigger event. It is not required for the lesser event to actually take place. Example: "Project Northwoods proves an inside job through necescalation." – ihaunter

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Sinema - motion picture media used to facilitate a crime. Example: The Pentagon surveillance camera footage is a poor piece of sinema.

Feary - false version of events formulated to generate fear. Example: The Offical Feary of 9/11

Fairy - false version of events formulated while under the influence of drugs. Example: The "collapse due to fires" fairy is laughable.
 
Impocept - Form of aircraft intercept which is made difficult by multiple exercises and false radar blips.

Mockumorial - A documentary film that disrespects victims for the purpose of entertainment. –gumboot
 
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Exclosion: a very loud noise that can only be heard by a small portion of a population or recorded by a select few devices. – Gravy
 
Thermaite - the process of changing one debunked hypothesis into another even more ridiculous hypothesis by vowel substitution. – delphi_ote
 
Victim - a person alternately pitied or accused of being deeply involved in a conspiracy to murder thousands depending on context, audience, and time elapsed since last dose of medication; see also firefighter.  – delphi_ote
 
PhotoChopping - Chopping of the bottom part of a picture, so the entry hole made by an airplane looks smaller than it actual is. – Bell
 
Poof - Debunked proof of a conspiracy – Bell

Alleged - What to say when it's clear that someone/thing happened or existed and you don't/didn't want it to because it disagrees with your crappy theory. – Bubbers
 
Misinformation - facts from scientific studies or direct observation that disagree with the conspiracy theorist's pet theory. – Trigood

Evidence - (pronounced "ev-ee-dense," cf. David Ray Griffin) facts from scientific studies or direct observation that agree with the conspiracy theorist's pet theory. – Trigood
 
Kook-a-like - Concluding one event is exactly the same as another event that looks-a-like. – Bell
 
stoot down order - Order given by either POTUS or VPOTUS to stand down at and shoot down United 93. – Bell
 
woo did it - Accusing someone of a crime without factual evidence. – Bell
 
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JAQing off - 1. the act of spouting accusations while cowardly hiding behind the claim of "just asking questions". 2. asking questions and ignoring the answers. "He said he was going to present evidence, but instead he was just JAQing off."

Disasterbate - Convincing oneself that a major event is actually a government conspiracy. Usually involves ignoring evidence, quote mining, and watching internet conspiracy movies. "After he heard about the explosion, he couldn't wait to get home and disasterbate.

Mutual Disasterbation - When one conspiracy theorist uses another conspiracy theorist to validate his own crazy speculations. "The Loose Change forums are a den of mutual disasterbation"

Keeblergonomics - a little known branch of science based on make-believe, tree-dwelling, cookie-making elves (see also: elfisics) "The towers should have toppled like a tree based on these keeblergonomical calculations."

Bermass - a loud-mouthed conspiracy theorist. "When all he did was yell 'liar liar' over and over, I knew the guy was a bermass"  – VespaGuy

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Evidense (n) : 1. misinterpreted data. e.g. photos of steel beams cut during the clean-up said to be evidence of umplosions (q.v.) such as *therm*te ; 2. coinvidence(s) (q.v.), ahumption(s) (q.v.). – orphia nay
 
Dodgic (n) : thought process and reasoning used by twoofers. Involves attempting to change the subject when faced with facts that destroy their assertions (usually by starting a new discussion, or posting heaps of links or pasting complete articles of ahumptions irrelevant to the matter at hand). – orphia nay
 
Dylanaversity - unable to watch a Loose Change video for more than a few seconds.

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Plane crazy: Unable to appreciate that a fully-loaded airliner crashing into a building might do considerable damage.
 
Trolled demolition:Activity carried out by faceless minions who seek to dispose of sensible arguments by endless nonsense.
 
WTCing is believing: Adage expressing the ability to interpret visual information any number of ways but the sensible one.
 
Illuminatichoke Kind of mental vegetable that feeds on nebulous concepts of "them".
 
Mexpert: Kind of layman who suddenly becomes omniscient about any number of disciplines after a gallon and a half of Dos Equis and a burrito.
 
Slowblind: Unable to realise that very large objects seen from a long way away seem to be moving much slower than they really are.
 
Alloyal subject: Person who regards as sacred the creed that steel is perfectly rigid until it melts.
 
Impervect: 1. Person who never stops to try to visualise the forces acting on a struck building after the initial impact has dissipated (gravity), and the direction in which it acts (downwards). 2. Unable to comprehend the concept of vectors. – Big Al
 
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tinfowars.com - a website devoted to the ramblings of a certifiable tin-floil-hat wearing lunatic – delphi_ote
 
NOMAD - Defence Organisation that provides continual air-cover for the Continental United States. Entire squadrons of well-armed fighters randomly criss-cross airspace on the look-out for potential hijacked aircraft which they rapidly shoot down. NOMAD were "stood-down" by the US Government in order to facilitate 9/11. – gumboot
 
Crater - A huge pile. – RW Guinn

evapidoration - the process by which steel turns instantly into a gas without melting or glowing, believed to require Star Wars beam technology or nanobots. – maccy
 
woogle (v.) - The practice of searching Google for conspiracy-minded websites to bolster one's nonsensical CT claim. Ex: "I woogled for alien reptiles and found a lot of really useful stuff." – jhunter1163
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bantopia -- the paradise that results from excluding all the rational intelligent people

confiction, daffyduction, and craziation -- the mechanisms of heat transfer that guarantee structural members will be unaffected by fire, while also permitting thermite reaction products to stay red-hot inside jumbled piles of gigantic heat sinks for months

cantex plane -- a hypothetical aircraft which, despite having unprecendented capabilities or qualities, would not, even if it existed, make the theory requiring its existence any more plausible

pinkslipnosis -- mysterious altered state of consciousness in which employees refrain from revealing evidence their bosses committed mass murder due to fear of losing the privelege of working for those bosses

exploseiving -- sorting through quotations and interpreting any occurrence of words related to "blow," "pull," blast," "set off," "down," or any word meaning damage or destroy in any sense, as a reference to bombs or detonating charges. Example: "We decided we had to cut and run" = "We decided we had to set off demolition charges to cut the support beams and then run away while the building collapsed."

pull-it surprise -- an award earned by imperfectly mimicking the jargon of people one has been working with and thereby, according to the misapplication of completely different jargon, unexpectedly confessing to a major crime

hate truss -- the structure connecting the ultra-leftist core with the Nazi perimeter, uniting them into a strong rigid framework  – Myriad

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Calculashun - Shunning logic, applicability or sense while punching a bunch of numbers semirandomly into a calculator and coming up with a number that you claim proves your point - even if it does exactly the opposite. – Mr. D

Prebunking - Being so desperate to glorify oneself that you leak enough information with your "pre-announcements" that skeptics prove you wrong before you even post your "proof." – Mr. D
 
Bushadow (n.) - (1) Code of honor based on Japanese Bushido, now practised only by a certain Texas oil dynasty, wherein its followers would rather die than admit that they really run the government, and provide disinformation on 911 to the media; (2) A clandestine agent of the NWO (see "Shill Oil Company").  – Fnord

Shill Oil Company (n.) - Front organisation for the U.S.A. branch of the NWO, based on a 1583 acre estate located seven miles outside Crawford, Texas, and with its main office on Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, D.C. – Fnord