Who am I? Why was I born? Why do I exist? Why does the universe exist? What am I supposed to do with my life? What is the meaning of life? Why do we die? Why is life not a paradise of ultimate happiness and satisfaction? 

I’m sure you’re wondering right now, what this is about. Well... it’s about a number of radical questions that shape the face of humanity. Those questions are what philosophers call “first order questions”. They are those questions that pop into your mind as soon as you find a chance in your fast paced life to sit alone, thinking, contemplating yourself, your life, and the whole of existence. Those are the questions that you find right before you whenever you manage to break off the machine of your programmed daily life. It is the ultimate Why. You’ll find that you have indeed asked yourself such questions repeatedly. What’s the point in living? What’s the meaning of life? Why work? Why do we have to die? Why is the world not a Utopia? Why is it so full of agony, pain, suffering and need? Why earn so much and do so much when I’ll eventually leave it all behind?

Let’s see in what way such questions do manifest in your life…

 

Haven’t you ever wondered; why do I wake up in the morning with an obligation to move out and work? Why is it that no pleasure is pure in this life, and that it always ends up with a deep sense of guilt somewhere underneath my conscience? Why is it that pleasure is always linked with obligatory needs and with different degrees of responsibility, agony and pain? Why does there have to be pain? Why am I limited in such a way? Why does everything in this life have to eventually come to an end? Why am I not immortal? And then, if one day I did manage to become immortal in this life, would I really want to? Why is there a phenomenon that we commonly know as boredom? This fast inversion in my feelings and my appetite for pleasures just as soon as I’m done enjoying them, what does it mean? Why is it in such a way?

When you are hungry (in need) you dream of eating a horse, and once you sit to a table, and start eating, your appetite for food starts dropping gradually until at a certain point, you no longer even bear to sit before that table, despite the huge variety of pleasures that may still be laid out before you. Your emotional capacity for taking in more pleasure is lost very soon, sooner than you thought possible, maybe even sooner than your physical capacity. That is, you may decide to leave the table before you’re even close to getting full. Why is that? Did you not dream of eating an entire horse just a couple of minutes ago? Where did that go now?

 

When you desire a female, you would dream of all kinds of sexual pleasure with her. You would do anything to get to her. And once there, once you got what you wanted, and those five minutes you spent weeks or maybe even months in order to have are over, how do you feel? Do you really still find yourself in desire to do all those things you dreamed of doing with her? A few hours later, would you still even desire to look at her face? After you have done so much, and defied so many laws and rules to get to those moments, once they’re gone, where does that leave you? Even worse, how do you feel when a few months later that female comes to you with shocking news that she is pregnant and that you’re the father?

 

You are prosperous with your work, and you are a fairly wealthy man; a powerful crowned emperor in the market. Can you honestly claim that you are happy or that you are satisfied? You thought that money could bring you happiness and that in order to be happy you must have the power to obtain everything you want to obtain. Now that you do have that power, how do you really feel? If your wealth is around 30 million dollars, why does it have to grow to become a 40? When it is 40, whey does it still have to grow into 50, 60, 100 .. etc? What difference will it make if you had twelve cars or two hundred? Can you not see that you are enslaved? Can you not see that you are slave to a desire to obtain all obtainable? Can you not see that you are a victim of your insatiable self? Do you not know that one day you will leave all this behind? Are you taking anything down with you to the grave? How high do you think you can go in life, and for how long do you think you could keep going?

 

Is it not a fact that the more money you possess the more enemies you will make? Is it not a fact that the more money you make the less trust you will feel towards everyone around you? Did money buy you security? How much security did it buy you? Is it enough? Are you not always worried about loosing your fortune? Are you not always worried about the heavy competition with other opponents? Is it not a fact that every one of them is out to get everything he can get just as you are? Do you think he will agree to share the treasures of the world with you? Do you not want to have it all just for yourself? So does he! Do you not want to become the strongest, and the most powerful? So does he. What will secure you from that? Can that security stop those sharks around you from conspiring to suck your blood and knock you down? Can that security stop you from eventually dying? You don’t want to leave your empire in such a way, do you? But what can you do? And if one day you did stop death from taking you (just for assumption), how much longer do you think you will have before you start feeling bored to death with everything you have?

 

Do you think you are the first man in history to collect so much wealth and power? Do you think you’re going to be the last? All those great people of old, with glories unparalleled, and dominance unequalled… where are they now? Those mighty conquerors who invaded the world just to prove to themselves that they can and to enjoy making people yearn to their will and desires, where are they all gone now? Once upon a time there was a man who ruled the whole world; so what? Once upon a time a man ruled half of the world … so what? Once upon a time there was a man who did so and so and so .. so what? Where is that man or the other now? What good is any of this doing him now?

You dye your hair, put a wig on, and stretch your face in plastic surgery… who are you lying to? Really? Who do you think you’re fooling? Other people? Do they not all know you’re nothing but an old pathetic human being who is hanging on to something he knows very well he is leaving anyway? You’re fooling yourself? Do you not know as much as everyone else does, that this is nothing but a fake mask?

 

You work so that people will remember you? Your goal and purpose of living is to carve your name in their memories? You choose this for a meaning? But then again what good will that do you when you are dead? You envy those people who are remembered in history for the credit they have made for themselves. But what do you know about the place where they are staying right now? Are they enjoying any of this? Is the memory they left among other people, helping him or doing him any good right now? What’s there for you? You’ll go down in history as the one who did so and so, that’s great… but you will be dead, so what good will your name written in a history book, do you there? And what if you were not talented enough for your name to go down in history, to rise high and stay resonant for a longer span of time? What if you were just an average Joe? How many are those? Why were they not all given what it takes to make millions of people remember them just as well? Is this what it all goes down to?

 

And then, how long do you really think your memory is going to last? There is a great number of great people, most of which were much greater, much more powerful, and much more effective than you ever dreamt of being, who had come to this planet once, and are all gone now, with no trace whatsoever to tell about them, not in an artifact, a monument, a document, or even myth or legend. They had their share of people remembering them and honoring their memory for many generations, and now what do they have, when it is all gone? People will remember you for a number of decades… a number of years… a number of centuries? Perhaps even millennia… but even this memory and the material trace it is linked to are, themselves mortal and are, themselves limited, aren’t they?

How many great kings have galloped millions of miles of land, millions of tons of treasures, and feasted their unparalleled glory before your time? How many men have obtained treasures of the earth and kept them in their possession along their limited lifetimes, and where did all that go now? How high did kingdoms rise before you, and fell like they never existed in the first place? How high do you think you can go, and for how long do you think you’ll keep going? Forever? That’s exactly what they all thought before you, but where are they now? What’s left of them, or of their “eternal” memories?

 

What is the value of a great reputation you made in your life so far, a few decades, or years, or months or maybe even minutes from this very moment, when you are dead? Do you know when you will die? How long do you know for certain that you still have left before you’re out of here, and on to somewhere else? Everyone leaves traces when he dies, your mere belongings, your fortune, the things you now cherish, the very piece of cloth that covers you right now, everything you have will suddenly be left for remains that people will divide among them. Will they remember you by those remains? Well, maybe, and maybe not. However, I believe the question that should concern you much more is; where does all that leave you?

 

Einstein was a great scientist in his time, and today the majority of educated people still remembers him and his name has turned into a pure legend. All this is great, but where is he now? What is the act of people remembering him or honoring his memory, doing for him right now? What difference did all that work he did do to him in the current stage of his existence? None at all? Of course not. The meaning and value of life is justified only by the meaning of death. Everything that starts, will eventually end, but only when its purpose is done. So start, do your purpose, and end, that’s ultimately the definition of everything that exists in the mortal universe that we know. If life is a place of work, then it must be that every single deed you do in it has an impact on whatever comes afterwards (i.e. after death).. Otherwise, the fact that life is the way it is, oriented around motion, work and causality will make no sense whatsoever as we shall discuss later on.

Life is a workshop and that man (in our example; Einstein) did get himself busy. So how did he prepare for this current stage he is going through right now and what is yet to come afterwards? What answer do you think he had to this question: why do I exist and why am I going to die? Life is a workshop, we have all tolls, all machines and all options, but do we really know what we are supposed to be doing with them? Do we really know why we are given choice? What decision are we supposed to come to? When the moment comes for us to leave the workshop, what product are we supposed to have accomplished? This is the question. This is why deep inside of you, you are never satisfied with your work, and in the greatest moments of your earthly glory, and once you give yourself enough time to contemplate your life, you find yourself wondering, what is this all about? You’ll find that in fact, despite everything you have done for yourself, the truth is that you feel empty.

 

Many people who searched for an answer to this question, decided to jump off their balconies or shoot themselves in the head for not being capable of coming up with a satisfactory answer. Just check out suicide reports and see how many cases take place in your society on a daily basis. I do not think this will shock you because I suppose you already know that. But what I’m sure you do not know or understand is the motive beyond so many such cases of suicide. What on earth would drive an ultimately successful businessman to end his own life in such a manner? What is he afraid of? What is it that could drive a fairly “happy” woman that people would envy for her apparent happiness, off the ledge of a balcony by her own free will?

 

Serial killers, assassins, and war criminals of history are much more famous and much more memorable, and may sustain a much bigger trace in the memory of humanity than most of you good guys out there … What justice is that? Regardless of the way the majority of people feel about those felons, if this is what life is all about, then how is it fair for such monsters to get the “honor” of fame, popularity, and “eternity” in such a way?

So to claim that carving your name on a stone for people to read after you and to leave a mark that says “I was here”, is all that you are about… this is as false as it is pathetic, and holds no satisfactory meaning for existence, life, and above all, death. If making one’s name, proving one’s self and getting people’s consideration are all that life is about then life would be unfair, wouldn’t it?

 

When you read a story and come to its happy ending, do you believe it when the writer says they lived happily ever after? How long is that “ever after”? And when did any human being manage to live a life of ultimate and pure happiness for the rest of his life, without a single moment of sadness, doubt, or fear of tomorrow?

Do you think the good should live longer than the bad? Or perhaps the bad should not be allowed to come to existence itself… you think it is an error in the program of existence that such scum does come to life? Why is that? Because life is supposed to be a paradise? Because death is a sickness that should be cured? You think it’s unfair that the good may die young? Or perhaps you think it’s unfair that anyone should die at all!!

 

If life is all about the material building and achievement, and I keep working all my life to build and to share in building, and so does everyone else, who gets to enjoy all that in the end? If I’m not staying here forever, and yet it is a place of work and building, then how is it fair that I leave all that behind, and the fruits of my material work without enjoying them or living to see the good they do to others or how others would build upon them? Why are those who came to life hundreds of years before me less “fortunate” to enjoy the civilization I’m enjoying now? And why am I less “fortunate” than those who will come after me? If there was a time when a certain illness was deadly and killed many people, when today it is not anymore, why am I now more fortunate than those people? If I was killed today by a disease the cure for which will be discovered just a few months after my death,

 

Is it really a question of fortune? Is it all about civilization and rising up the ladder of construction and knowledge? If that was true, then life would be unfair.

 

If a few decades ago, a man was “lucky” enough to find the woman of his dreams, and to give birth to a beautiful child that became you… have you never asked yourself, what if your father was not that “lucky” the day he met your mother and decided to marry her… would you have ever come to this life? What does it mean or what would it be like if I never came to life?

How then do you define “luck”? A random act of chance? A resultant of an unbalanced nonlinear equation? You think tomorrow is a resultant of random interaction of collective actions and events? Who then should you be thankful to for your existence or your good “luck”? Who then should you run to when in the midst of heavy winds and storms in a boat in the middle of the sea, you are about to drown and there’s no way out for you? And who should you be grateful to when you are delivered safe out of it? Can you deny the fact that you do indeed feel grateful to something you may not know what it is? Can you deny that when in the midst of the storm you will blurt the word “Oh, God” or “Oh my God” and face your head up to heaven in so doing? Or that when the storm is over, you may find yourself saying “thank god” even if you do not believe in any form of deity? Why do we do that? Why is it so instinctual inside of every one of us regardless of his beliefs? Why is it part of our design or “brightright” in such a way? Didn’t ever occur to you that the reason you do that could be the very same reason you are searching for answers to those deep questions, and are not satisfied with any of the answers you ever came across to this day? Didn’t it ever occur to you at the depth of your soul that perhaps there really is something you are supposed to know, and that you have not known yet? Do you really think that such questions are unanswerable and that life is whatever you think it is? Why then are you not satisfied with that notion? What seems to be missing?

 

Do you think that maybe one day this “luck” thing the meaning and origin of which you do not know, will be manageable and one could control his own “luck” all the way? Perhaps you think that a totem or a symbol could help bring you good luck!! Does it really? This totem must be a powerful being of godly dimensions indeed so that it could run that “random” equation of events all for your favor!! It must be a god!!

And then, there would be hundreds of such gods in the universe, every one of them is powerful enough to reshape and redirect the equation of life for the favor of his “owner” – it is still just a piece of wood or stone isn’t it? Well, every totem god will desire to run the machine of life at its will… giving good luck to the ones it chooses... favoring those it likes... But then, such is what they all desire to do... and life is singular, the equation is only one big equation... every machine could only have one control panel, for one operator to run it… so how could this be? How could there be more than one entity running the same process of life, fate, fortune and luck as it chooses? Not to mention that entity being a piece of wood or stone!! Humiliating and so degrading a belief, isn’t it? Well, believe it or not, the majority of humans do believe that crap. Some of them were genii, great noble men all credited for their great intelligence. Ask Pythagoras or Alexander the great about their beliefs, and see what they would say. You may wonder how could such gigantic mentalities fail to see how naive and unreasonable such a belief in the multiplicity of lords and gods really is? Well, it’s simple … they took it for granted. If you were brought up as a child on a lie, this lie would be the truth for you … you would even fight for it if you had to … it is also part of your human instinct to feel the urge to fight for what you believe whatever it may be. So yes they were genii, but they never really felt an urge to question their beliefs or search for answers to such questions. But does this mean they never asked themselves those questions you are asking yourself right now? Of course not, they must have, to some extent, at some point, and one way or another, they must have. But still, life took them away, and they told themselves, if such is what my parents and their parents before them used to believe, then it must be the truth …

But is that true? Is it a fact that since this is what the majority of people around me, my society and my parents believe, then it must be the truth? How many “truths” would there be then? An annoying notion isn’t it? First you have to acknowledge the meaning of the truth before you search for it. If I believe something and you believe another about the same topic, then at least one of us must be false, right? How then can two unequal beliefs about the same thing, both be the truth? Could a car be both white and blue at the same time? Could a pen be both here and there at the same time?

 

What is the truth then? Where can I find the answers to those questions?

 

So let’s find out where this goes … shall we ???

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