i'm a publisher
I'm a publisher. I'm so ashamed to be slumming on this page, where have my standards gone?
If you really are a publisher, you know your purpose in life is to publish me, lavish praise upon my work, and reward me with great wealth. I thought that much was obvious. For a small fee you may have a lifesize likeness of me to worship.
Just in case you'd like to comment/criticise, care for a manuscript, or anything similar,
my email address is below.
You may also wish to contact me for:
1. Co-ordinates of my residence, for air-strike convenience.
2. A small sample of my DNA, for cloning purposes.
3. The location of all my writing, so that such a literary horror can never again be unleashed (see 1.).
4. Full biographical details for Nobel prize nomination.
email@example.com - Spam bots will be exterminated. Publishers will be fearlessly groveled to and supinely obeyed- so watch it.