Chris – Erick’s Boyfriend
Ethan – Chris’s Roommate (in “voice-over”)
Chris’s roommate Ethan’s assistant was on vacation for the week. Since Erick was “technically out of work for all intentive purposes” (as he puts it), Chris suggested Ethan ask Erick to help him out in the office as opposed to hiring a temp.
“Everything’s fine,” Erick reassures Ethan over a Skype call. “Just a couple of phone calls. I emailed you those messages.”
“Thanks. Has a package from the Friedman case been delivered yet?”
“It has not.”
“Alright, please call me as soon as it arrives.”
Erick watches as Ethan quickly turns his head to have a side conversation with someone at the courthouse. “Gotta go, Erick. Deposition. If you call me and I don’t pick up, leave me a voicemail, text me and email me. I’m sorry to be so anal about this. It’s just really important.”
“No worries, dude. Have fun in court.”
Erick closes out of Skype. The desk chair he’s sitting in is turned to the right. “Are you coming down here or should I come back up there?” Chris asks flirtatiously from the floor.
“We really should not be doing this here,” Erick says as Chris rises to his knees and unbuckles Erick’s belt.
“Why not?” Chris asks with a wicked smile.
“Because this is an office.”
“I know. I’ve never done it an office before.” Chris replies as he dives into Erick’s neck.
“Would you do this in your own office?” Erick asks.
“If my office was made up of only myself and someone else who happens to be on vacation, absolutely,” Chris answers.
“How would you feel if this was your office and Ethan was about to make afternoon delight with some lady friend of his?”
“I wouldn’t care as long I didn’t find out – and I’m sure as hell not going to tell him about this…are you?” Chris asks with a raised eyebrow and a sly smile.
“What if I did? Think about it. Technically, I am under his employ and I could get fired for this.”
Chris leans in and kisses Erick. “He’s my roommate. I’m your boyfriend. We could film us having sex, download it to his desktop and have it play as soon as he logs onto his computer and your job here will still be secure,” he responds as he slides Erick’s belt through the loops and tosses it onto the floor.
Erick slides off the chair and onto the floor, pulling Chris down on top of him. “This is only until I come up with a rebuttal.”
“You aren’t actually filming this, are you?” says a voice from the computer.
“That’s a good idea, Erick. Why don’t we film this?” Chris responds.
“What?” Erick asks. “Are you kidding me? It’s enough that I have to get naked in front you, let alone in front of a camera.”
“But we’re in an office. We could create a scene and do role play.”
“We could also launch a website, charge a monthly fee and post an update each week.”
Chris gets up and dusts himself off. “I just want to have some fun and you’re making fun of me,” he gripes as he walks around the desk and sits down in one of the chairs.
“I’m not making fun of you,” Erick says, still lying down on the floor. “I just don’t understand where all this is coming from.”
“Where what is coming from?’
Erick stands up in his boxer shorts – his pants bunched around his ankles. “You come over her to have sex that you say you want to film and I’m not supposed to question where this, among many other things has been coming from?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I don’t know what’s going on, but lately you’ve been nearly insatiable. You want it in the morning. You want it before bed. You want it in the middle of the night. You’ve had your way with me in the stall of a public restroom. And then there was that hike…”
Chris stares at Erick for a moment. “I don’t know of too many guys who would complain about the fact that their boyfriend wants to have sex with them.”
“They would if they were exhausted. Before you had your way with me that time in the bathroom, did you notice I had dozed off AT THE URINAL?”
Chris thinks about this for a moment. “No.”
“Did you know that I fell asleep at lunch with April last week?”
Chris sits up in his chair. “You did not tell me about that…so no.”
Erick pulls his pants up. “Well, I did.”
“Well, I’m sorry you’re exhausted,” Chris replies sullenly.
“I’m sorry you like to have sex with me.”
“I do,” Chris responds with a slight smile on his face.
Erick walks around the desk and kneels down in front of Chris. “We could always make an arrangement with Eugene,” he suggests.
Chris laughs. “How would this differ from the one we already have with him?”
“This way it would be all about you instead of being all about ME.”
“Gotcha….but there is something I should tell you.”
“I know. You like Eugene. He’s cute. I’m okay with it.”
“That’s not it.”
“You don’t like Eugene. That’s fine. We don’t have to have any arrangement with him at all. I’m okay with it.”
“Erick, please. This is hard enough without the jokes.”
Erick nods and stands up. He leans against the desk and crosses his arms. “I’m sorry. No more jokes.”
“Remember that occurrence last year when ‘the bass dropped out before the end of the song’?”
“I remember that. It was pretty funny. What about it?”
“It wasn’t all that funny after all,” Chris says. He takes a deep breath before continuing. “We both laughed about it, but it freaked me out.”
“Because I’m going to be 38.”
“And I’m going to be 35. So what?”
“We can revisit this in three years, but since that time my sex drive has not been…as driven. So I started taking this medication.”
“And it worked.”
“A little too well.”
Erick looks at Chris for a moment with a mix of concern, compassion and frustration. “Why didn’t you say anything about this before?”
“Would you have?”
“Yes, I would.”
“You wouldn’t have been worried about how I’d react?”
Erick takes Chris by the hand, pulls him up to him and looks him in the eye. “Not in the least. You love me and I love you. So you didn’t need to worry any more than I would have.”
“Do you want me to stop taking the pills?”
“Do you want to stop taking the pills?”
“Yes…I dozed off in a status meeting last week.”
Erick chuckles, stands up and kisses Chris. “Then stop.”
“But what if I’m not in the mood as much?”
Erick wraps his arms around Chris’s torso. “Then I’ll catch up on my reading.”
“That’s really sweet guys,” Ethan says through the computer. “Judge Kittleson thinks so too.”
“Please tell me I’m finally hearing voices in my head,” Erick says.
Ethan laughs. “Nope. Erick, next time you may want to end the call before closing out of Skype.”
“I thought you had ended it.”
“I was going to until I heard Chris’s voice. Then the Judge, opposing counsel and I decided that you two were much more interesting than this deposition.”
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