Slowcooker & Chicken Noodle Soup 

The kind of food you thought only came from people with breasts and an attitude problem.


Nothing annoys me more than the sound of my son playing FIFA Football on the PlayStation while I am cooking dinner, because I know he is getting so good that I will never be able to win a match again.


I find that the time of day I least want to spend preparing a meal is that couple of hours just before meal time.  I want to be able to hang out with my son and then while I’m womping him on Crash Bandicoot Cart Racing, have a meal magically appear in front of me.  Guess what?  This can happen without having to marrying a Philihpino mail-order bride.  What you need is a slowcooker.


Slowcooking is fab.  You prepare the meal when you have the time and you eat it when you are ready.  It is the ultimate cook-and-forget appliance.  The stuff that comes out of it is delicious, with that home cooked quality you thought only came from people with breasts and an attitude problem.


I bought my first slowcooker to make beef stew.  I love beef stew.  It’s the meal I would ask my mother to make on my birthday.  I never got dear old mom’s recipe so I’ve been experimenting and I have come up with a pretty good formula that I have cleverly hidden it in the chapter entitled Beef Stew.  But I’ve also discovered that slow cookers are great for all sorts of stuff.


The instruction book that came with my slowcooker said you should always brown meat and ensure that the ingredients are hot before putting them in the slowcooker.  So I always prepared the meal in a saucepan and then transferred it piping hot over to the slowcooker.  Then I went on-line and found out that the American’s were bonkers about slowcookers.  (When you think about it, America is the ultimate cooking source – keeping one’s ass that big requires work.) I found this American recipe that said - throw four frozen chicken breasts, a handful of frozen peas and corn and a can of condensed tomato soup into the slow cooker and cook on high for 5 hours.  Surely not, I thought - but I gave it a try and it was lovely.  If you forget the five hour cooking time, the preparation is faster than an Iceland microwave dinner.


I’m telling you, slowcookers make it possible to cook stuff that would even impress your mother-in-law and she hates you. Check out this home made Chicken noodle soup recipe. 


Make yourself a lovely roasted chicken dinner – or –


Go to the supermarket and buy one of those cooked spit roasted chickens.  When you get home throw away the thermal bag it came in and put the chicken in a roasting tin and then hide it in the oven.  (Don’t heat it up again they tell you not to.)  Only take it out of the oven when the kids can see you – reinforcing the super-chef persona we are working on.  (You will find that one of the joys of living with children is that they are easier to lie to than wives.)  If you want to work at it, make some mashed potatoes and onion gravy like in the Bangers and Mash recipe but if we are talking about cheating, use chicken gravy granules (don’t let anybody see the jar and use the roasting pan to mix it in, giving the illusion of homemade gravy) boil some rice in a bag and micro-zap some frozen peas.  It’s still a good meal. 


I can almost hear you asking, “I thought you said chicken noodle soup?”  I’m getting to that. 


Whether you cooked it yourself or you cheated - you are now left with a chicken carcass with a lot of meat still left on it.  ('Cause face it you’re a single dad and crap at carving.)  Put it in the fridge and the next morning bust the carcass into smaller pieces and put it in the slow cooker.  Mix up a couple of Oxo vegetable stock cube in boiling water, pour it over the bones and leave it all day on low.  At dinnertime fish out the carcass with a straining spoon and pick off the meat with your clean fingers and throw the meat back in.  Now all you have to do is boil up some noodles (I like Sherwood’s medium egg noodles) Add them to the broth and you have just made homemade chicken noodle soup.  Mazl tov - nothing says I love you like chicken noodle soup –ask any Jewish Mother.